Mending a marriage?
I know a long term marriage takes work.
We have hurt each other dreadfully, althugh I fear more than I hurt him.
The day we married was the best day of my life.
24hrs later on honeymoon and he didnt want to know me. He slept the entire time.
1 Year later and he slept with a prostitute in Amsterdam. I was drunk and giggly. It was a dare but never thought he’d go through with it. He was sober.
We had a disagreement about having kids. In the end he agreed to say yes. When we told his parents his mother looked at me like I was a whoare. He never stood up for me!
Turns out he doesnt want kids. I now respect his desicion.
We’ve never celebrated a wedding anniversay. Married for 4yrs nxt mnth.
YET he wants to save the marriage! He booked us in for counselling, begged for another chance as I wanted to end it.
NOw he’s not sure. the feelings between us are really sore right now but at least we ARE talking! I realise I have also been responsible for this.
ENcouragement?
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Tagged with: amsterdam • best day of my life • desicion • disagreement • encouragement • feelings • honeymoon • marriage • parents • prostitute • term marriage
Filed under: How To Save A Marriage
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put the past behind and work on your marriage with him. maybe you also hurt him in some ways in the past and when he took revenge, things got messy. as for his mom, my only suggestion is to ignore her completely for now and only focus on your marriage. you know her coz you’re married to your husband so your relationship with your husband is the most important thing. everything else is secondary. don;t be bitter about the past. don;t worry about the future. only focus on today and now. tell him right now that you love him. tell him that a dozen times a day atleast. love him as much as you can unconditionally. if he is willing to go to a marriage consular, do it. that would be really good. and its great that he wants to stay in this marriage. and he wants things to work out. make that your relationship’s strength "both of you are unwilling to let go. so don’t mess things further. and without any delay, start fresh, without grudges and learn to love and respect each other. remember, the only relation between hubby and wifey is of respect, trust and LOVE. nothing else. after all we’re not related through blood with our hubby’s right. so you have to respect each other. and trust each other blindly. and love unconditionally, everytrhing will work out for the best. good luck!!
What is it that keeps you hanging in there apart from the love you have for him?
He sounds indecisive. If you believe he loves you equally than everything should fall into place. However you have more than one issue to deal with. His mother and the fact that he doesn’t want children. You even forgave him for cheating!!
Love is more than just a feeling in your heart, it should be realistic and respected by each partner. He has taken advantage of your love and patience. If you feel that this marriage can work , then go for it and get the counseling, although he has now changed his mind again, what does that mean? If he felt the same way as you, you would not be in this predicament.
Oh my. That whole deal is no good. Life gives little hints and second chances. You need to move very quickly before it’s too late. A husband who loves his wife with all his heart wouldn’t do such things. There’s good men out there, find another who fits what you want out of this short life.
At least give it a chance and try the marriage counseling. Maybe he did not realize what he had. You did take vows. You should have spoken to him about children before you got married. Never give a man permission to cheat. That is like telling a child he can have candy instead of dinner!!!
Sorry for what ur going through but 4yrs en no kids coz he doesent want,en whats the reasons ,thats funny.
Anyway i wonder if u stay all ur life without a baby i know a baby is happyness anyway talk it out en try to solve if u love him