Comments on: How do I help my wife love/trust/desire me again…I cheated? http://howdoigetmyexboyfriendback.org/1129/how-do-i-help-my-wife-lovetrustdesire-me-againi-cheated/ Your guide to getting your ex lover back into your arms Wed, 17 Mar 2010 14:24:10 +0100 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.8.4 hourly 1 By: cgscm http://howdoigetmyexboyfriendback.org/1129/how-do-i-help-my-wife-lovetrustdesire-me-againi-cheated/comment-page-1/#comment-4713 cgscm Sat, 12 Sep 2009 01:38:05 +0000 http://howdoigetmyexboyfriendback.org/1129/how-do-i-help-my-wife-lovetrustdesire-me-againi-cheated/#comment-4713 Wow, the story is the almost the same, here in my home. I am a mother of five and my husband and I where married almost 9 years. When my husband decided the grass was greener else where. I am still with my husband, and I have good days and bad days also. I still have nightmares of him with her, places they met, or went together. I do not even like 2 go 2 those places anymore, nor do I have the desire 2 go 2 some that I have never been, but he took her. We are going on our 11th anniv. now. And I still only trust my husband about as far as I could throw him all wet and he is 200lbs dry. I am all of 140lbs., so that should give u some idea of how much of the trust is regained after almost 2 years of working on it has gotten. I love my husband 2 death, because I know that if he was with someone else it would kill me. I can say this for a fact, because I was married before 2 another person who decided 2 have an afair on me after I had our son, and had gained some wait. I left and never once was sorry for leaving. And I have never looked back wondering what it would of been like 2 have stayed. So I guess what I am saying is if your wife is still there then she most diffently LOVES U, and it will be hell on her if u do it again or leave her. The trust I can honestly say may not come back, that is a hard one 2 rebuild after broken. As far as the sex goes let her drink before hand, I do and it helps 2 let some of what happen go so she can relax and enjoy. Other wise all she is thinking is did he do that with her, or did he learn that from her. U made a choice 2 do what U did not her, she just has 2 live with a bad choice U made on your own for the rest of her life, feeling that she did something wrong in your guys relationship that made U make that choice, and trying 2 figure it out so she will not do it again, even though everyone tells us it was nothing we did or said that made U make that choice. I am sure U are a great guy, and father if U have kids, U are a great friend 2 others, and a great nieghbor, so is my husband, but losing trust because of another female and your husband having sex with another female when u are married is different then if u are just dating or going out. U made a comment that we believed. Please just do not ever be late and take your wife with U when ever U can, 2 let her know U most diffently want her in your life, give her your acct. information(cell phone, business stuff, checking, savings, get a GPS on your car so she know where U are) so she can check them when ever she wants, U have 2 let her know u have nothing 2 hide from her. This diffently has and still is helping me on my not so good days. Be willig 2 talk about everything even if it brings up past emotions. Work hard, and stay out of trouble, Keep loving your wife as much as u can. And best of luck 2 another family staying together. (Take a surprise trip and remarry your wife is a good idea also) Wow, the story is the almost the same, here in my home. I am a mother of five and my husband and I where married almost 9 years. When my husband decided the grass was greener else where. I am still with my husband, and I have good days and bad days also. I still have nightmares of him with her, places they met, or went together. I do not even like 2 go 2 those places anymore, nor do I have the desire 2 go 2 some that I have never been, but he took her. We are going on our 11th anniv. now. And I still only trust my husband about as far as I could throw him all wet and he is 200lbs dry. I am all of 140lbs., so that should give u some idea of how much of the trust is regained after almost 2 years of working on it has gotten. I love my husband 2 death, because I know that if he was with someone else it would kill me. I can say this for a fact, because I was married before 2 another person who decided 2 have an afair on me after I had our son, and had gained some wait. I left and never once was sorry for leaving. And I have never looked back wondering what it would of been like 2 have stayed. So I guess what I am saying is if your wife is still there then she most diffently LOVES U, and it will be hell on her if u do it again or leave her. The trust I can honestly say may not come back, that is a hard one 2 rebuild after broken. As far as the sex goes let her drink before hand, I do and it helps 2 let some of what happen go so she can relax and enjoy. Other wise all she is thinking is did he do that with her, or did he learn that from her. U made a choice 2 do what U did not her, she just has 2 live with a bad choice U made on your own for the rest of her life, feeling that she did something wrong in your guys relationship that made U make that choice, and trying 2 figure it out so she will not do it again, even though everyone tells us it was nothing we did or said that made U make that choice. I am sure U are a great guy, and father if U have kids, U are a great friend 2 others, and a great nieghbor, so is my husband, but losing trust because of another female and your husband having sex with another female when u are married is different then if u are just dating or going out. U made a comment that we believed. Please just do not ever be late and take your wife with U when ever U can, 2 let her know U most diffently want her in your life, give her your acct. information(cell phone, business stuff, checking, savings, get a GPS on your car so she know where U are) so she can check them when ever she wants, U have 2 let her know u have nothing 2 hide from her. This diffently has and still is helping me on my not so good days. Be willig 2 talk about everything even if it brings up past emotions. Work hard, and stay out of trouble, Keep loving your wife as much as u can. And best of luck 2 another family staying together. (Take a surprise trip and remarry your wife is a good idea also)

]]> By: Love to Love http://howdoigetmyexboyfriendback.org/1129/how-do-i-help-my-wife-lovetrustdesire-me-againi-cheated/comment-page-1/#comment-2594 Love to Love Thu, 13 Aug 2009 20:49:52 +0000 http://howdoigetmyexboyfriendback.org/1129/how-do-i-help-my-wife-lovetrustdesire-me-againi-cheated/#comment-2594 Forgiveness is acknowledging your mistake and choosing to not do it again. That is what forgiveness is for you. It is saying to yourself you are still a great person even though you made a mistake. If you blew off the final exam in High School and failed it because you were having too much fun and were given another chance to take it, you'd study your butt off and focus on doing a better job next time. Same thing with all of our mistakes and failures. For her forgiveness will mean acknowledging that you made a mistake but it did not destroy her spirit. She has to let go of yesterday and until she does she will keep the pain in her heart. Forgiveness isn't about making someone else feel better about the mistake is about making ourselves feel better despite the mistake. If you have forgiven yourself realize that because she is still with you and living as a wife with you she is trying. Keep your chin up and make sure to always be available to her. Make sure to constantly shower her with how much you love her and be there for her in ways you had not been in the past. This will be reminders to her when the memory comes up that that was you yesterday, not today. Today you are the man who learned from your mistake and you're more faithful in your heart to her now than you have ever been. She'll realize your mistake was actually a blessing because you became a better more attentive man which is what she needed anyway. Forgiveness is acknowledging your mistake and choosing to not do it again. That is what forgiveness is for you. It is saying to yourself you are still a great person even though you made a mistake. If you blew off the final exam in High School and failed it because you were having too much fun and were given another chance to take it, you’d study your butt off and focus on doing a better job next time. Same thing with all of our mistakes and failures. For her forgiveness will mean acknowledging that you made a mistake but it did not destroy her spirit. She has to let go of yesterday and until she does she will keep the pain in her heart. Forgiveness isn’t about making someone else feel better about the mistake is about making ourselves feel better despite the mistake. If you have forgiven yourself realize that because she is still with you and living as a wife with you she is trying. Keep your chin up and make sure to always be available to her. Make sure to constantly shower her with how much you love her and be there for her in ways you had not been in the past. This will be reminders to her when the memory comes up that that was you yesterday, not today. Today you are the man who learned from your mistake and you’re more faithful in your heart to her now than you have ever been. She’ll realize your mistake was actually a blessing because you became a better more attentive man which is what she needed anyway.

]]> By: Sydney http://howdoigetmyexboyfriendback.org/1129/how-do-i-help-my-wife-lovetrustdesire-me-againi-cheated/comment-page-1/#comment-2595 Sydney Thu, 13 Aug 2009 20:49:52 +0000 http://howdoigetmyexboyfriendback.org/1129/how-do-i-help-my-wife-lovetrustdesire-me-againi-cheated/#comment-2595 Regardless of your remorse, you still cheated. You broke your commitment to your wife and ther isn't any way she can truly trust you again. The best thing to do is accept responsibility and get out of her life - allow her to find someone who truly loves and respects her. Regardless of your remorse, you still cheated. You broke your commitment to your wife and ther isn’t any way she can truly trust you again. The best thing to do is accept responsibility and get out of her life – allow her to find someone who truly loves and respects her.

]]> By: nikki newman http://howdoigetmyexboyfriendback.org/1129/how-do-i-help-my-wife-lovetrustdesire-me-againi-cheated/comment-page-1/#comment-2596 nikki newman Thu, 13 Aug 2009 20:49:52 +0000 http://howdoigetmyexboyfriendback.org/1129/how-do-i-help-my-wife-lovetrustdesire-me-againi-cheated/#comment-2596 Dude, we get the picture. It doesn't matter if god has forgiven you, it's up to your wife to decide. How do you get through it? I'm afraid you're at her mercy. You have to listen to her cry, and whine and nag and anything else she wants to help her feel better, for one year. If she hasn't done it in one year, its not going to happen. Dude, we get the picture.

It doesn’t matter if god has forgiven you, it’s up to your wife to decide. How do you get through it? I’m afraid you’re at her mercy. You have to listen to her cry, and whine and nag and anything else she wants to help her feel better, for one year. If she hasn’t done it in one year, its not going to happen.

]]> By: godiva http://howdoigetmyexboyfriendback.org/1129/how-do-i-help-my-wife-lovetrustdesire-me-againi-cheated/comment-page-1/#comment-2597 godiva Thu, 13 Aug 2009 20:49:52 +0000 http://howdoigetmyexboyfriendback.org/1129/how-do-i-help-my-wife-lovetrustdesire-me-againi-cheated/#comment-2597 Wow. I think one of your friends asked a question earlier about how he could help you. Small world. Are the guy that cheated with the psycho chick that won't stop calling and sending letters to your wife? If not, ignore that. Anyhow, you said you have repented of your sin. So all is well with Him. Now to get everything okay with her. You just have to earn it with time. Show her that you are trustworthy and be steadfast. Wow. I think one of your friends asked a question earlier about how he could help you. Small world. Are the guy that cheated with the psycho chick that won’t stop calling and sending letters to your wife? If not, ignore that. Anyhow, you said you have repented of your sin. So all is well with Him. Now to get everything okay with her. You just have to earn it with time. Show her that you are trustworthy and be steadfast.

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