How can I again fall in love with my husband like I did before I married him?
We are married for almost 9 years now, have two boys 5 and 6. Life is not perfect , but still it is good. I don’t feel the intense love and attraction I used to feel for him . We are careful to avoid fighting , we are acting civil and if we are not aware, often we easily get into stupid arguments. I am so sad that we both lost it. Sometimes I give up on him.It makes me think that if I was still in love with him like before, I could never let it go so easily. He is a good man, nothing is wrong with him…..but we are so different. I want not only to make this work, I want to fall in love again. Did anyone ever felt like me ?
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Tagged with: good man • love • stupid arguments • two boys
Filed under: How To Save A Marriage
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I have no idea what it would be like to fall out of love, but you should think about why you might be falling out of love.
Did he change mentally, emotionally or physically, or is he the same person you fell in love with? Why did you fall in love? Could you ever live without him or would you love to be without him?
You could never fall out of love if you’re treating each other with love, respect, trust, communication and doing anything to make each other happy. If that’s not the way you are treating each other, then it will get worse. You cannot be selfish in a marriage, because selfish people should be alone.
The fact that you want the relationship to stay together is a good sign, but WHY do you want to stay together? If it’s for anything other than love, that isn’t good. It can’t be for money, or a place to live, etc. It should be because you do still love him and maybe not even realizing how much. Well bring it out. Bring out the reasons that you want it to work. Don’t keep it cold, make it hot.
Always kiss him, hug him and tell him you love him. Become excited when he walks in the door after a long day at work. Be sexy and look beautiful. Give him compliments. Tell him what you would love him to do or change. Communicate about everything. You will become so close and you will realize that he’s your man for the rest of your life. It could be so exciting.
Good Luck
welcome to the real world..
u were lucky enough to fall in love first time..now ur really being greedy
take a holiday together and get in some role playing… and see what happens…
try 25 years of course u still love him but you need to bring romance back into the relationship get a baby sitter go out and enjoy each others company just the 2 of you x
When the kids are in bed go for a romantic bath together and light some candles. And in the bedroom light candles and maybe give each other a massage and spend time re-connecting. I’ve been married for 14 yrs and sometimes we get the same way. It can be hard and I have 5 kids which makes special time hard and hubby works 2 jobs 6 days a week and I just went back to work recently. We are saving up to go and have the honeymoon we never got to have. Maybe that could be another suggestion for you two. Just even a weekend get away or dinner and a movie, or dancing. Also remember don’t sweat the little things in life. Good luck.
Tell your partner how you are feeling, I’m guessing with the nit picking and stupid arguments he might be feeling the same way or thinking the same thing…You’ve been together for 9 years…You should know eachother enough by now… You both need to sit down and talk about how yous are feeling and gotta get some alone time without the kids.. do something that you use to do before the kids come along…or something..But definately talk things through.,..
it happes when a person get married & have childeren ….as responisbility comes automatically on shoulders …you are no more only lover but a caring wife…a responsible mother..
but yes it’s upto you ..you can still manage to have same love feelings as before marriage but both of you have to put efforts in same…try to take break from sexual relationship for a month & make only hugs & kisses…..both of you feel the difference.
It takes a lot of work to say in a relationship. that lovey dovey feeling you get when you are first with someone will go away, and that will definitely happen with ANYONE you are with. some people divorce to go find that "love" again but that kind of love never lasts.
You have to accept the reality and that is that you become best friends with the person you marry. You share funny jokes with each other, spend time vacationing together, talk about hobbies you do together, etc etc. You also need to have things you do away from each other so that you can talk about it when you guys meet up again.
It sounds as though you are frustrated that you are no longer act like a couple, that’s why you start fights with each other. Even when you have kids, you two need to go out and do things as a couple. dress up and go out on dates, just the two of you. communicate with one another and promise that you will always buy each other birthday gifts or spend birthdays together. if you are not satisfied with the physical relationship then you both need to work on trying new things to spice up that area of your lives. give each other massages or whatever you guys can think of. good luck to you!