How to make her fall in love with me again?
I’ve been dealing with a breakup from a girl I’ve been with for the past three years. We met at the end of senior year in high school. I went to school 10 hours away freshman year and we stuck through it. I felt stronger and stronger about her each day. I decided to come back home and go to school with her for sophomore year. Again, it was a fantastic year and I loved every minute I spent with her. We were best friends, inseparable and we connected on a very deep level. I knew I loved this girl but I felt like I needed to go back to my first school to get a significantly better degree. At the end of sophomore year I told her I wanted to go back. She began to pull away until I told her I was doing it for us and to better my future. That made her feel better but she still pulled back. I kind of changed too as a result. I felt weird about her actions and I knew she took my leaving as a slap in the face. I began to be more short with her and our relationship took a turn for the worst. I thought everything was fine until one day a couple weeks before I left that she came in my bedroom as I woke up and said she wanted to be single the next year. She said the way I had been acting, the distance, and everything made her want this. I went through many stages of falling apart, anger, upset, numb, happy, just every emotion. A few weeks ago I got to school and my feelings stabilized. I realized that this is a girl worth fighting for. I took a look at myself and the way I had acted to push her away. I think God forced me to make the decision to leave to better myself and now I feel like I can be the most amazing boyfriend to her. I’m now going back home because I don’t feel this is the place for me right now. This decision was not because of her, but it doesn’t hurt that the love of my life is there. She’s been kind of seeing somebody now. She says she likes him but still loves me. She asks me why I’d deserve a second chance after hurting her. She says maybe in a few years we can try again. I know I’ve changed and I know that our relationship is right. I know I can be everything this girl could ever want. I know her better than anyone in the world. We are still best friends. I’m afraid she’s already written me off because she is unsure and doesn’t want to be hurt again, even though she hasn’t told me this. I’m going back in a few days and I’ve gotten her to go to dinner with me this upcoming weekend. She says its strictly as friends. I want to show her I can be a great boyfriend but how can I do this as just a friend? How can I show her I’ve changed and will always make her happy? What about this other guy, I’ve been supportive but how do I approach it? If you’ve read this far then I really appreciate it and I look forward to hearing back. Thanks.
No need to be a dick Linah. Thanks to everyone else who’s taking me seriously
@ LM: correction, shes not with another guy just seeing him. she says she doesn’t want to be his girlfriend even though hes asked…makes me think even more shes confused as to what to do
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Tagged with: anger • best friends • couple weeks • dealing with a breakup • emotion • feelings • freshman year • girl worth • god • love of my life • relationship • second chance • senior year • slap in the face • sophomore year
Filed under: How To Get Her Back
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give her flowers and tell her you’re really sorry and you made a stupid decision and if she’s still in love with you she should see that.
Next time dont make it so long! so f off.
it is to late you blew it dude she will only want you as a friend better luck next time
I not sure but I have a song for you To make her love me Rascal Flatts.
Good Luck
This is too long, so I’m not gonna read it all…but if someone doesn’t wanna date you, they don’t wanna date you, so move on, there’s gotta be someone else.
You can’t make someone love you, either they do or they do not. She has moved on, and you need to do the same. Eventually you will get over her, in time. Find something/someone else to focus on.
do what you did to make her fall in love with you the first time.
Well, I honestly don’t know how to answer this question. But I wanted to tell you that you seem like a very smart, very sweet guy.
I think you made what you thought was the best decision for yourself and that maybe she took it the wrong way.
I wish you the best and i’m sure that everything will work out the way it is supposed to.
It sounds like her big issue with you is the long distance relationship thing. Sometimes it just doesn’t work for people. You’ll have to find intelligent ways to show her on a regular basis that you being away for school doesn’t mean you don’t want to be with her every chance you get. I’m not sure how far away your school is, but coming home every weekend or every other weekend to be with her is a good start (even if it’s just as "friends" for a while. Call her each day even if it’s just for a quick hello, send her ecards every once in a while… just do everything you can to show her how much you truly love her.
The most important thing of all is to tell her exactly how you feel. She needs to know exactly how much you love her and the future you’d love to have with you in it. BUT… if she asks you to back off, do it (you don’t want to seem like a stalker.) You don’t want to smother her and cause her to pull away even more. Good luck!
If this is the complete story, then I do understand you when you say how you want to receive the best education for a bright future.
However, it’s always a great challenge to have a love relationship when you are in college because it’s necessary to focus on your studying and it’s hard to balance love and school because if the breakup happens while you’re in the middle of the semester, it can have a devastating effect on your grades and perspective at that time.
It probably would have been better to both be brutally honest about things and only see each other in between semesters because then both could focus on school and then both of you could decide if this relationship was worth going forward with.
You really should respect the relationship she is in right now because you have to think that how would you feel if she was creeping out to some other guy to see him for dinner, and he really wanted her back? You would be able to trust her if she were completely yours again if she had plans to meet up with a guy "friend"?
Be strictly friends. Respect her new relationship and don’t wait for it to falter. Date other people platonically. That doesn’t mean you have to be intimate, unless you know in your heart that you are completely done with her.
You might be the kind of person that it’s all about the challenge of the conquest. Once you knew she was there, you started getting scared and making excuses to run away from love or you began to take her for granted. Dating for over two years can become a rut.
If you really love her, let her know that, but also let her know that you have respect for her situation and that you want what is best for you and if she wants to be with him, gulp, then so be it.
But let her know that if she needs you, that you will be there if you can.
Give her some time. Don’t play games, no mixed signals but don’t put your life on hold either. I find when people whom you have been involved with are with someone else, they tend to act more cold.
This is a great metaphysical affirmation that creates clarity almost immediately:
What ever is meant to be will be, if not, set me free.