How do you fall back in love with your husband?
I don’t hate him, I just don’t love him anymore and I don’t know how to make myself. I don’t want out of our marriage I just want to be in love again … this is lonely …
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Filed under: How To Save A Marriage
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i think u should move on in life .u will get better then ur husband . do some job enjoy being single again . dont worry about people they just bark just forget about them.
you were never in love with him. you were just young and dumb when you married i bet.
Candlelit dinners, long walks in the moonlight, passionate sex, intimate conversations – anything that you both enjoy that you can do alone together is going to help.
Another thing you should try is a daily compliment. Every day, think of something sincere you can tell him that you appreciate about him. This mental exercise will force you to think about his positive qualities, and it also has the excellent side benefit of making him feel appreciated!
sometimes you can’t…
sometimes it takes a long break and lots of other relationships to realise what you missed..
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try going on dates walks in the park candle like dinners and bath and lots of love making but do take slow steps
You have to leave behind those things about him that you’ve allowed to come between you. Choose to not focus on the bad and ONLY focus on the good. Remember what it was about him that drew you to him in the first place. Take him out on a date…make love…get away from the kids for a night and focus on the two of you.
I think the first thing you need to do is determine when the feeling stoped and try to pin point what changed in your relatioship. Once you have done that you need to go back and work that area. Alot of women feel taken for granted or not appreciated anymore…if this is the case you need to let him know that the feelings are fading and this _______ is what he can do so you both can work on it.
You have to focus on the things that you fell in love with at first. Also, picture your dream man. The one that you would want to spend forever with. Then match up all the ways your husband IS that man. Act the way you would act if you were "in" love. Send him notes, make naughty phone calls, flirt with him. Make him special meals. Do the things you did when you first fell in love. If you focus on those things, the feelings will follow. It will also encourage him to do the same types of things, which will make you love him even more.
If you really want to love him again, act like it. feelings always follow action. It may take some time, do little things for him you know he would like. Ask his opinion on a little thing and act like you are listening. Tell yourself, I love him, and watch the feeling come alive. It is only a feeling after all, and action can provoke it again.
You’ll need to try to get the "spark" back – try "dating" him again. Let him know there are problems you are going though emotionally so he can be aware – he shouldn’t be in the dark totally about this problem. But I wouldn’t tell him "I don’t love you anymore" – that would be devastating.
You clearly sound like you care for him, so do work on this. Counseling may also help. But work on romantic get-a-ways, and truly getting in touch with him again. Let yourself be open to whatever caused you fall in love initially.
Good luck to you!
Role playing.
You may not have the tools/skills to "fall in love" again. You may need the services of a marriage counselor to help you… or, some self help books. Even after all this…. your love may have just died and there will be no rekindling it.
I refer to them as date nights…no kid – no phone – no chores – just the two of us doing whatever. Also – evening walks are fabulous! A time to chit-chat and catch up on the day. We also both read the Five Love Languages and that also helped us to reconnect and understand each others needs. Love can be a lot of work sometimes…
just when you wake up in the mornings just say to yourself I truly LOVE this man and all that he does for me and I am grateful for him… see if this can’t make it work
The idea of love is a fantasy. Love changes over time. Therefore, it is imperative that the foundation of any relationship is based on friendship. Then a marriage needs commitment, obligation and trust. A great deal of open and honest communication. Those are the relationships that stand the test of time. Do things to rekindle the relationship, things that both of you find interesting and fun. Spending time alone together doing things of interest. Begin dating one another again, put effort as when you first met to attract him once again and he should do the same. Good luck.
Well between you and me, I’ve been down this road myself and my husband and I are just starting to rediscover a new kind of love. It isn’t the same and I’m not sure it ever will be. Sometimes you just have to wait it out before making a choice to leave and abandon your whole relationship. Obviously if you don’t want to leave him, you still love him. Your just not feeling it right now and it scares you. You owe it to him to let him know how your feeling. You both need to talk about it.
Whatever you do, don;t go looking for other men right now because they will just want to coax you out of your marraige and into their beds! Which may seem appealing to you right now because your so lonely but thats the last thing you want to do! Try different thigns with your husband. New ideas that may bring some of the spark back into your marraige again. Don;t forget all the wonderful times you have had together and try to focus on them and maybe even recreate them all over again. We all have times in our relationships where were going to feel like "Why am I doing this? I want to be single,have fun again etc" but I urge you to reconsider before continueing to think this way. Time and effort but if in the end, after you have tried everything you can possibly think of then you owe it to BOTH of you to let it come to an end. Whatever you choose, You’ll know you did all you could to make it work and you atleast tried. Good luck
HEY! FIRST OF ALL THE MAIN THING IS THAT U MUST UNDERSTAND THAT WHAT UR HUBBY WANNA OR INTERESTED.SOMETIMES IT HAPPENS THAT WHAT U LIKE UR PARTNER DOESNOT ; OR U R INTERESTED IN SOMETHING & UR PARTNER NOT REALLY INTERESTED WHICH CREATES SERIOUS SITUTATIONS. IF U REALLY WANNA TO GET BACK UR LOVE AGAIN AS EARLIER THEN JUST " GIVE LOVE TO UR PARTNER WHICH HE REALLY NEEDS……….. IN ANY FORM…………..
AS BY MY PERSONAL BELIEF I WUD SAY THAT " IF U REALLY LOVE SOMEONE JUST LEND URSELF TO UR PARTNER., & C IN FEW WEEKS U ‘LL HAV GREAT ENJOYMENT UR ENTIRE LIFE………
You need to sit down and think about what it was that made you fall in love with him in the first place. Go out on dates again, lots of touching, massaging, kissing and hugs, saying I love you and meaning it….
i know what you mean. i’m guessing you do still love him but you want that feeling of being "in love" again. that feeling we have when a relationship is new. i think most people, women at least, long for that at one time or another. we settle into our everyday lives and sometimes forget what brought us together in the first place.
try forgetting about the everyday stuff, the mundain. start going out more. make it a #1 priority to get to know one another again. sit down and talk about things on you mind and allow him to do the same. you may find that you are both in the same boat, looking to rekindle your realtionship.
This happens in a lot of marriages – things get stale. Successful marriages require 2 things – work & communication. I would talk to your hubby about this – not necessarily say that you have fallen out of love with him, but let him know that you are not completely happy at the moment. Then take the initiative and start being more romantic yourself. Write him little love notes & hide them where he will find them – in a drawer, briefcase, etc. Start flirting with him again. Have a good, old-fashioned date with him – heck, even neck in the car like you were teenagers.
I am not married but have been with my b/f for 7 years. I went thru this…..I still loved him but not in that intimate way. After I had my daughter I felt not as sexy,etc. and I let that interfere with our relationship. For me I had to let go a bit and let him explore my body again. I realized that he didn’t think I was any less Beautiful than before. Ok fast forward cause I know our circumstances aren’t the same….HAVE SEX MORE! Us having sex more led to us wanting to be around each other more just in general and we were nicer to each other and more considerate..then I fell back in love. And my sex drive came back! It’s amazing how much sex really does change a relationship for the better.
Make time for each other..it’s gonna be hard for you at first believe me because I felt the same way towards my man as you do. Once you relive the things that made you happy before you will love him that way again. Talk to him……he probably feels it.
So…for short while, fake it.
Do the same things that you did way back when to fall in love with him. Flirt with him. Laugh at his jokes. Massage his shoulders. Hold his hand. Cook a nice meal. Have sex. Lay your legs across his lap while you watch tv. Kiss him full on the lips. Give him a long hug. Talk to him about how you feel. Say "I love you" frequently and when you say it make it so sound like you really feel love not like "ok bye, love ya. Talk to you later!"
As you do the behaviors that you had while you were falling in love with him, your feelings will follow.
Once that love is gone, it’s gone. And there is nothing he can say or do that is going to make you fall back in love with him. End the marriage now and put an end to your misery.
you cant fall back in love like that…why do you want to stay in the marriage? do you have kids? does he treat you right? People need to realize that in time the type of love changes in a marriage, you still love each other but just in a different way.
Maybe there is something or someone around you that is making you feel like this…