wife cheated, shes home again, how i still love her and make love to her?
wife had a one night stand two weeks ago, i still love her, she says she loves me, wanna work it out. we hav a 6 yearold. first time shes cheatd, said it was the worst drunken mistake in her life. but it was 14 days ago right now, was she doing him at this time that might. how do i still love her , i said i forgave he, we,ve made love the last 2 nights(with protection) cause they didnt. how do i still touch her , how do i still make love to her, knowing what happened. our love life has always been more then satisfying for both of us, 10 years together, but how do i look at her in the same way, how do i touch her the way i did 2 weeks ago, i we both want to start over again together, but how?
Related Information:
Tagged with: 10 years • Cheatd • love life • mistake • night stand
Filed under: How To Save A Marriage
Like this post? Subscribe to my RSS feed and get loads more!
Take a break. You’ve been betrayed.
Go away for a little while, maybe, but this one is going to take some time, if ever.
Stop imagining that she was having sex like she does with you.
Don’t do that to yourself, because I guarantee it wasn’t. Only the two of you have sex like the two of you.
Can you handle the answer if you ask her to give you a blow- by-blow description of the night? A sort of "putting yourself in her shoes" for the night?
It’s risky, but if you can listen, It just may benefit you so you can be angry, and then move on either way.
She should be ashamed of herself, and getting angry at her once and blasting her does not relieve her of the tremendous weight she’s put on you.
You may never be able to trust her again. That sucks for you, because you had no part in it, and want things the way they were.
Was there a problem that wasn’t being addressed before this night?
Does anyone have their head buried in the sand??
You may need to take this time to get right into each others brains and decided what each of you REALLY wants out of life.
Please don’t make the same mistake she did. You’ll hate yourself.
I can say that it is not the worst thing that can happen, but it is way up there.
She betrayed you, plain and simple. maybe she should live without you for a while and the two of you can really see where you’re at. get yourself some legal assistance so you don’t lose touch with your child.
Are you sure you forgave her? If you truely have, then drive onwith your life and dont look back, and dont bring it up again. The only way you should bring it up is if you ever have reason to believe she cheated again, and at that time, I would kick her to the curb.
One mistake is forgiveable, cheating twice, is not.
ur not mad?!?!?!?! id be pissed if i found that out you seriously should divorce shes cheating on you and you know she is and you still want to have sex with her what are you thinking man the reason shes cheating on you is most likly because shes not as interested in you as she is for the other guy talk it over with her and tell ehr you know and ask her why
gee that is a tough one! anyone want a crack at it while i talk to a marriage counselor?
If you have forgiven her and you both want to work things out but you aren’t sure how go see a marriage counsellor.
Well first, this is why I don’t drink alcohol, and don’t allow my husband to drink when I am, or a faimly member is not around, because Sh*T happend. Every heard the country song alcohol, listen to it, it is sooo true. Anyways been down this road before with my ole man! It’s never going to be the same as it once was, and it is going to take a while for you to gain her trust back, but yall can work this out. Make sure you tell her this is her one and only second chance, and let her know how bad she hurts you! Talk to her and tell her how you feel! Ask each other if there is something about the other that makes you not happy, Communication is NUmber one in a Realtionship!
Good Luck Hope it works out!
You can mind things, yall have a child give her a second chance, but ask her if it was really cause she was drunk or if something is making her unhappy, but do not let the child here yall discuss any of this!
Tell
after ten years when one cheats there is always a reason,i am a female and i can honestly tell you that no matter how drunk we are we still know what we are doing and when it comes to cheating getting drunk gets us the coarage to do it if we want to deep down,for you wanting to trust her it might work out,but once a cheater always a cheater that can never change,and you cant just over night feel thast nothing has happened,and it could very well be that she is back with you because you have the stability that the other guy doesnt have but not so much the sexual desire she wants,and thats not to blame you,if you want to know if it will work out dont let her know it is ok you making love to her is degrading your self by doing that,your giving her the okat that it is ok to sleep around on you after 10 years no not good enoug,do you want tto know if your relationsahip will withhold see a counsellor together if that does not work call it quits,
give it a little time.
As soon as possible have tests run to make sure there are no STD’s.
Maybe even a little counseling if the problems linger.
If you truly still love her and want to make things work, then be patient and give it time.
Question…. why was she out drinking without you.? That is problem number one.
I believe when going out separate, that only leads to trouble, there is always that doubt in the back of any-ones mind.
Well, you are a pretty amazing man to forgive her in the first place, and I applaud you for being able to do that. People make mistakes. You know your wife better than anyone, and you know if she means what she says about it being the worst drunken mistake of her life.
I think time is the only thing that will heal things here. You have made the decision to forgive her, which is a very noble and kind thing to do. You must love her very much to do that, and I’m sure she loves you just as much as ever now. You just have to accept that the way you are feeling is normal and understandable after a betrayal like this. She has to understand that too, and accept that you are finding it hard to deal with.
It takes time to really forgive someone. I don’t think you can ever forget this, but you can move on. Perhaps this will work in your favour and make things stronger between you. After all, if you can get through this, you can get through anything. Tell her how you feel, let her try to help (but don’t try to heap on the guilt – that won’t help). Try to take things slowly. Maybe go out for dates again like you did in the beginning. See this as a new beginning for you both.
She has hurt you badly and betrayed your trust, but you can get through it together.
Dude pump her roughly in the backdoor till she cries begging for you to stop but don’t stop cause she deserves it up the tailpipe for doing what she did, plus if it was me, I would do her best friend, and her sisters muhahahaha revenge sweet sweet revenge then after its all done just say (Oops sorry it’s the worst drunken mistake)
You are in a critical situation the pain may never go away and most importantly where will the trust be? you cant have a relationship with someone you cant trust. then again everyone makes mistakes. If you both feel that you can save your marriage it can be possible I would recommend seeing a therapist to help talk out the issues. Hopefully love will conquer all and you can save your relationship. And if not it wasn’t meant to be and there are bigger and better things for you to discover in life. Best Wishes For you and your family!
you don’t do anything the same way, things have changed and everything is different now, there is no going back to the same old thing
Bad news for you —- all you are doing is delaying the inevitable…. odds are BIG BIG time that your marriage is doomed. I would bet the farm no matter what you do you that you will be divorced from this woman in less than 10 years. Dump her and get on with the next phase of your life..which possibly may mean finding another woman and with this experience, hopefully you will be a better judge of character next time.
If you have truely forgiven her then you will put it behind you and move on, people make mistakes and if it is the only time and she was drunk I doubt it will happen again. Obviously have her get tested so it can be completely put behind both of you.
Well you are questioning it, so that means you are upset about it, which you have a valid reason to be upset. I, myself, could not love someone who cheated on me. Sex in my eyes is for two people who love each other. If your love life was more than satisfying, then she wouldnt have had to go out and have sex with someone else. This is the only time that you know of that she cheated on you. You shouldnt have to work it out with her now just because she wants to. By the way you are talking, I dont think you want to work it out or you wouldnt be questioning it. If someone really loved another person, they wouldnt have had to go find someone else to roll around in the sack with. That is not what love is all about. Once a cheater, always a cheater. What is she going to say next time she does it? OHHH IT was a mistake. I was drunk.. Well that is no excuse. Dump her ass. It is her own fault. You are better than that.
dump her get a divorce shes not worth it
Wow man that is a hard one. But you said something interesting…worst drunken mistake..that is a red flag. But here is how I see it. Who was she with that night? What kind of people do she hang out with? Was she at a bar or club by herself? She is home again? Why did she leave? It makes me believe you guys have some unsolved issues that lead to this. Whatever it may be…get them straight. Her being a woman…. most of the times well 95% of the time she expects you to know what is going on in here life. Communication and Insecurity leads to infidelity. But it seems like you really love her. Express to her that although you still want to be with her and maintain a family.. she will have to work hard to gain that trust back. Time will tell if she wants to make the effort. We can say we forgive…but we really don’t. Ask yourself are you ready to do that? or should you give yourself time to think about it before just starting over? If the love is there…even time apart will bring you guys back together.
Honey, I feel sorry for you! Theres not that many guys out their that would forgive their wife 2 times after cheating on them. My husbands ex cheated on him and brought two other kids into their marrage. She has 3 kids with three different guys. And only one if my husbands. And to top it all off the other two kids that arent his, has his last name. If you are staying with her b/c of your 6 year old, think again, you will never be able to look into your wifes eyes and tell her you love her and really mean it. You will never be able to trust her again, you will always want to know what shes doing or who shes with, or if shes lieing and cheating again on you. The best thing you can do is tell her that you gave her once chance to prove that she was sorry, and she did it again. And this time you wont forgive her. Remember this ONCE A CHEATER ALWAYS A CHEATER. You will never be able to "make love" to her, without thinking who else is she sleeping with. Just think about how you feel. Or turn the table around, what would she do if you cheated on her? She would leave your ass in a heart beat. So think about it long and hard honey, cause she is not going to change for any one, shes already prove that to you by cheating again.