By: Bunny8558

Bunny8558 — Wed, 02 Dec 2009 11:09:49 +0000

Poor thing. My best galpal and I actually lived together with my now-husband a while back. She was dealing with a lot of problems at home, most likely had an eating disorder, and was pushing everyone away with her increasingly odd and juvenile behavior.
I tried to talk to her about this, hint about it, and outright help her with these things, all to no avail. After telling her that she was going to have to depend on me for less as she was draining me emotionally, she threw a pillow at a friend of mine, spilled his drink, and forced him to clean it up– I asked her why she was being such a b—-.
That was the only and last straw for her. She automatically catergorized me as "the enemy," even though I’d tried to be her friend through all of her neuroses, drama, etc. I tried talking to her– she’d decided to not talk to me again. Ever. I tried three more times. She didn’t listen, except to take things out of context in order to turn friends against me (which didn’t really work very well on her part).
I lived with her for four months, moved out with quite a bit of drama (she locked me out while I was moving), and haven’t spoken to her since. I sent an email apologizing for the way I handled myself, as I let my anger get the best of me, even though I knew she had a lot going on in her life. She didn’t respond and hasn’t for three years.
We were best friends, and all it took was one little (on-the-dot) remark to end everything. I wonder about her, about what I could’ve done differently, etc. I’ve come to one very major conclusion– when other people are messed up and it leads to tensions, you can only do so much to make a relationship work. If it’s not enough to keep the friendship going, you cdan’t beat yourself up because 1) the problems started because of the other person and 2) you’ve done all you can to fix it.
Long story short, people move on because of pain, pride, and avoidance. Perhaps your friend, like mine, didn’t want to admit she was wrong in the least. Perhaps she, too, felt that she couldn’t get over the fight, or even worse, didn’t want to be friends with someone who really knew her and her flaws. Maybe you exposed her flaws, and she didn’t like the fact that you knew about them. If she keeps pain inside (like my friend did), she could find great discomfort in being friends with someone who sees through the illusion she creates for the world of a happy, perfect girl.

Comments on: How can a ex best friend move so quickly? Please help. Whats your opinion?

By: Bunny8558