How can I get my kids to like me more than my ex-wife?
I’m at a disadvantage, cuz SHE got custody of them. So she gets to poison them against me constantly. Also, I pay her support, and it looks like she’s buying them shit and I don’t get them anything, but it’s MY money she’s using to buy their love!
What are some good ideas to swing my kids more my way?
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I guess you need to speak with a professional about this. I’ll send you my ex-husband’s number in a moment. Please let him know that you ARE supporting your children, will ya?
Disney World. Disney works. Just put it all on your plastic, you’re going to be working until you’re 80 anyway.
Love CAN be bought.
First, you aren’t paying HER support, you are paying support to the kids. There is not too many things you can do about the poisoning of the children. Just do the best you can when you have them and they will have to make their own choices. Sooner or later they will make their own minds up. Remember, they are people too and when they grow up they will see how they were scammed. Time cures everything. By the way, even though she has custody, you and her still make decisions on the growth and education of the children. Contact her and tell her what is bothering you. If she can’t do it civilly then get the courts to talk for you.
Spend time with them. I know she has custody of them, but every time you spend with them, let them know you love them and that they mean the most to you in life. Call them when you don’t get to see them, just to ask them about their day. This will tell them in time that you love them and are always thinking of them. You can’t buy love, not even with kids. My ex has more money than I do, but my kids know I spend on them what I can. I spend time with them and we have fun without lots of money. My ex buys them everything, but doesn’t spend time with them like I do. Kids know the difference. Don’t fret.
Convince them to live with you. That way you can take all the credit for the money YOU spend on them!
Besides, if that doesn’t work, you could always marry me. When your sons/lesbian daughters hit puberty, how could they resist having this sexy, pink-haired cartoon character as a stepmom?
*blows kisses*
True story, my wife’s evil ex just told his daughter that I was the reason Mommy didn’t live with him anymore. Nothing installs hatred more than blame for destroying the family you know. Just give sob stories about how much you loved her, and she wanted her new life more than the family you had. Even 7 years later, and my kid (I raised her dammit, she’s mine) not seeing her ‘real’ dad for over 5 years because that wonderful guy ended up in prison, she still has some subconscious resentment.
Edit: don’t worry, as soon as they get a little older, and their mother has to control them a little bit, the first words out of their mouths will be "I’m going to live with Dad"
give them your time. pay attention to them. regardless of how you feel about their mother, don’t talk her down to them. be strong and happy and share every part of your life when you are with them. accept the situation and don’t be negative. there is no winner when exes compete for children’s love, but the children lose a lot
You got some seriously skewed priorities. You and your ex-wife may no longer be together but you share a wonderful joy in those kids – why would either of you be preoccupied with "poisoning them" against the other or "swinging the kids" more one way or the other. They’re your kids for crying out loud and regardless of what differences/disagreements drove mommy and daddy apart why are you trying to use them as pawns to continue your crusade against the Evil Ex!!!
Do yourself and your kids a favor and grow up. As a dad your job is to raise those children to be respectable, responsible individuals and the ex-wife spoiling them with your child-support and alimony money doesn’t stop you from still fulfilling that obligation. You’re putting way too much emphasis on combating your ex and not giving nearly enough attention toward supporting your children. The divorce no doubt affected them as well and right now their emotionally and psychologically fragile…they need their father, not some self-centered revenge obsessed zealot who’s sole interest in them is "winning" them away from mommy.
I’ve got a collection of well over 300 Barbie Dolls I’m thinking, and some Hot Wheels. Think that might when them over? I’m not using them anymore….
TELL THEM THAT SHE IS REALLY A MAN!!!!!!!
DO NOT go negative on mom or her partner(s). They do not need the drama or manipulation. Spend as much time and money on them as you can. Show them that you care by calling often and going to their events. Find ways of creating memorable times together that you can afford.
Put some crack in her car, and ring the Police. Then when she gets her nasty @rse thrown in Jail, you’ll get the kids. You can even take them to visit, to really rub her nose in it.
On a more serious note, just keep on doing what you are doing. The Kids will see the truth for themselves when they are older, and they will really resent Her for doing this. Don’t bad mouth her, to them, don’t get involved in stupid point scoring. (Those kind of points are worth even less than Yahoo points) I know it’s not easy when your kids don’t like you, but the most important thing is that they know that you love them. You don’t have to be their friend, but you do have to be their Parent. And she cant buy their love, (She shouldn’t even be trying to) Just try to make sure the kids have fun when they are with you, & make sure they know you love them. That’s all you can do, really.