Where do I begin to love my wife again….?
I never really had the deep feeling for her, but I’m committed to her and our children. I’ve never cheated or strayed, but she’s been such a negative person and about a week ago we had a argument that just hit me dead center and it feels like something in me changed. I don’t know what, but I’m just not interested in her physically, emotionally, verbally or visually. Nothing. Be fine with me if she just didn’t come home anymore. Appearently it’s obvious and now she’s starting to question my feelings for her. What do I tell her? I’m just so tired of your crap that I want you to leave, leaving my with alimony, child support and less time with my little ones that fill my life? What the hell?
You shouldn’t be so quick to assume I should not have married her. Please, just stay with an honest answer to an honest question.
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Tagged with: alimony child support • crap • feelings • hell • honest answer • honest question • little ones • love • negative person
Filed under: How To Save A Marriage
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By the fact that you’re writing this question, you want things to change. So that’s a good first step.
In a bad situation, the only thing you can control is yourself, so start changing that. Consider it an investment into your future happiness. Regardless of how she acts, try doing nice things for her – cooking dinner, doing some of the cleaning so she can lie down, giving her a back massage.
Don’t even bring up the issues yet, just show her that you want to improve things. After a few days, try sitting down with her to talk things over – but make it about how YOU feel, not about what she does. So, don’t tell her she has a negative attitude. Instead, discuss how when she says certain things, it make YOU feel bad. Discuss other ways for her to express herself. Start off the conversation, though, by explaining that YOU have let things go, and that you want to change that, and you want to start making her happy again – ask her what’s been bothering her in the relationship, what you can do to make her happier. And although it might be hard to accept whatever she’s going to say, do your best, because as many issues as you have with her, I’m sure there are things about you that bother her as well. And the only way to improve things is to show that you’re truly interested in changing things. Once you start to truly be different on a consistent basis, over time, she’ll start to improve, too. I can almost guarantee it.
why did you marry someone you have no deep feelings for? this is not fair to her
just tell them
u have to tell her the truth now , cuz if u dont, it’s gonna be too late and you gonna be sry ! !
You never should have married her in the first place. But to salvage your marriage, try counseling. Also try to talk to her about your feelings. But speak to a lawyer first before you tell her all your feelings because if she’s feeling vindictive, she’ll probably use it against you later.
Wasn’t fair to marry someone you never had deep feelings for. Waste or your time and heart ache for her.
You need to tell her the truth but don’t be a jerk about it.
Jeepers. That is beyond the pale. You need to invite her to marriage counseling where the unalterable differences in the two of you will become apparent to her without you having to face telling her alone. That would be the better way. Time to get moving on this before it spins out of control. Maybe with marriage counseling she will move into personal counseling and get a grip on herself. Good luck. You’ve got a rocky road ahead of you with a woman like this on your hands.
Tell her the truth… that you don’t particularly have any feelings for her, good or bad, but would be fine without her; however, not without half your stuff, your kids and half your income. Sleep in separate rooms even… then if you’re lucky, she’ll eventually leave and you file for divorce on the grounds of abandonment and maybe keep your stuff.
At least that’s my theory
You can’t change the past. So you need to move forward. If you do not love your wife then you need to let her know, it will be very hard but do not stay for the kids. If you stay for the kids then will actually be hurting them, they know and see a lot more than we know. Good Luck!
You both deserve to be happy, and be loved by someone who loves you back equally. Even if you have no feelings for her now, you know its true.
The only fair thing is to let her go, or you go, so you both have a chance at happiness. Life is short, dont waste your lives.
The things you’re losing (alimony, child support, and time w/ them) are just the repercussions that come with a marriage not working out. I’m sure it hurts, but you wont be the only one losing things, her and your children will be losing plenty too.. even though it may be hard for you to see it.
I hope you both end up happy in the end, good luck.
cut sand paste this question and email it to her. that will start the ball rolling since anything is better than what you’ve got going right now. and you are right about there are things that one says that never can be taken back.
Well…it’s selfish to walk out on your children…but I mean, it’s really up to you. But think…would you want your children to be in a normal family and grow up to know what it is like to be in a normal functional family? They need a father figure man…get over yourself…unless you absolutely hate this woman