A restraining order was filed against me by my husbands ex-girlfriend for dropping clothes off for my daughter
My step daughter was about to strart first grade at a Catholic School and I knew she would need new school stuff. I made sure no one was home, parked on the street and walked a huge bag of shoes, socks, undies, approved shorts, uniform shirts, ect. ect…The neighbor saw me and told the ex-girlfriend (step-daughters mother) that I brought the items over. She then filed charges of stalking against me then my attorney forgot to show up to court, not me I was there but my attorney forgot, the judge refused to let me speak and the restraining order was issued. Now I have an outlandish attorney bill and a restraining order. How can this be? What do I do to fix this?
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Tagged with: attorney bill • catholic school • clothes • ex girlfriend • first grade • neighbor • restraining order • school stuff • shoes • socks • Stalking • step daughter • step daughters • Step Mother • uniform shirts
Filed under: How To Get Her Back
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I’m going to be brutally honsest. Sorry. Deal with it.
If you have a TRO against you, it’s not because you dropped off clothes. There is a history here that you are not telling us. I’m not saying you have to, but a judge isnt going to issue a restraining order if this is the only incident between you and the mother. I’m not taking sides. She may be a maniac. I dont know about that. According to what you said you did, you did not stalk or break any law. But I suspect there is a history.
As for the attorney, did he "forget" or was he not notified of the hearing. TRO hearings can take place with very short notice and without you or your attorney being present. If he did forget, you do not have to pay him. If he had short notice and could not be there, you do not need to pay him either. In other words, unless he did work on the TRO, you do not have to pay him. Call him and tell him so. If he persists on being paid, call the bar association. Nobody here can help you.
As for the TRO, it can be expunged or vacated in a subsequent hearing. They are granted if the judge feels there is enough cause and pending danger to the child. Whatever you say doesnt matter here. That’s what the judge thought was going on. So, you have to go to court with your attorney or a new attorney, file a motion to vacate the order and present your case. That’s what you have to do. You can post a hundred posts here and nothing will change unless you follow the procedure in your state to vacate the TRO.
I’m an attorney. I know. It’s ALWAYS the laywer’s fault. But as an attorney, I can tell you that the facts you presented do not add up. There is more to this story. Much more. Some of which I’m sure you do not want to discuss, or do not believe is important. There is no way a judge issues a TRO in this situation. Unless he wants to be sanctioned. So I suggest you slow down, think about all the factors that may have led up to this, and assume some of the responsibility. I mean, if there was not animosity or problem between you and the mother, why would you have to "sneak" over to bring such a nice gift, and why would someone feel the need to "tell" on you for doing it?
Don’t do anything,if you give her enough rope she will hang herself
you are screwed. what a sucky attorney. try your local legal aide. they should give you free or low cost advice. i dont know why the judge would not let you speak. that doesnt sound right. i didnt have representation and i spoke. try going to that judge and asking the balif if you could speak to the judge. sometimes this is allowed. in cases or situations like yours it is best to make arrangments before showing up. otherwise people who are stalkers have made it easy to label others who are inocent look suspcious.
May I suggest obeying the restraining order in the first place. Let the attorny bill be a reminder to you to be a good lesson in not violating what the law gavel has come down on. You should not have went over there in the first place, a restraining order is a restraining order! Don’t matter what the circumstances were! Don’t do it anymore.
Not much, there are some laws if your attorney does not represent you correctly but that is a difficult situation and very pricey to sue a lawyer if in fact he was negligent. They do have that right to file a complaint, there is not much you can do except speak to another (better) lawyer. You can show up to court and tell the judge the situation and if he/she believes you they will not grant the RO
Try an appeal. Plus you could file a report or even sue your lawyer who didn’t show up, especially if you still got a bill.
File a complaint with the State Bar. If your attorney is guilty of malfesance then they will likely take action against the attorney and impose some type of discipline. However, I have a hard time believing a Judge would issue a restraining order based on the facts you represented. There must be some history here that you are not disclosing. The fact your attorney did not show may be due to your not having paid the contracted fee or you did not do what you were supposed to do like make the down payment or something.
I too am an attorney and although I have seen genuine injustices occur on a regular basis, I cannot help but believe you have not provided both sides of the story.
There has to be more to this story. And the fact that you said you "made sure no one was home" would imply that you weren’t supposed to be there, for whatever reason. So, if Mom’s made it clear that she wants you to stay away/cease contact (because as a step-parent you have no legal rights here), and you then come on to her property, she can get a restraining order (Dad should have made arrangements from HIM to drop the stuff off). Therefore, even had your attorney been in court, I doubt the outcome would have been different.
I had the same thing happen. My ex’s mom didnt want her dating an “American” and filed a restraining order against me to keep me away from the apartment building that they owned (my ex was living in an apartment there). The commissioner didn’t give me a chance to tell me side of the story and listened to my Ex’s Mom EVEN THOUGH 100% of her testimony was hearsay.
I got imposed with a 3 year restraining order. As I was walking out ironically enough a sheriff deputy followed me out into the hall. He advised me that if I wanted to get my side heard I should go file a De Novo. He also said that it would be in front of and actual judge and the burden of proof would be greater.
Once my ex’s mom was served with the De Novo motion she did some research and realized that she didn’t have any proof of all of my “harassment” and she went back on her own accord and rescinded the order to avoid a possible contempt charge in the De Novo hearing.