Should i contact my ex if i want him to come back on his own?
Some say no contact at all; some say send him an email saying i’m moving on; some say send him an email saying i’ll be there for him. I really dont know what to do. We’ve been together for a year. He broke up with me 2 weeks ago and he’s not gonna date others. he just wants to be single b/c he has too much at school to handle. But i just found out that something real bad happened to him. i dont know if i should send an email saying i’ll be there for him. B/c i’m afraid then i broke the rule of dont contact he’ll come back faster b/c that way he may think i’m chasing him and doesnt want me back. What should i do? please help.
by the way, he doesnt want me to know about the bad thing that happened to him. It’s his own fault. It’s embarassing and he may feel he’ll lose respect and dignity over that.
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wow .. how stupid !
if you make the contact … he is not coming back on his own ..
you have baited him
jesus christ.
Contact him to ask if he is ok and you are there if he needs any support or to talk. You are obviously going to still care for each other so it is ok to see if he is fine
After your additional info I say just leave him alone
If you send him an email about what happened, he will think you are stalking him. I say, leave it at no contact. If he wnated you to know or needed you, he would have told you.
I was doing the whole no contact thing with my ex, and my dog passed away. I wanted him to know, and I told him, even though I broke the no contact rule.
So if he wants you to know, he will tell you.
NO!!!
Let him come back on his own, and if he doesn’t then hes not worth it and go find some one else thats more loyal!!
Don’t contact him b/c if u do he’ll think u are desperate and u don’t want that. Thats what I did I let him come back on his own and the last relationship I had I did contact him and now he thinks I’m ruing his life. And he said that he’ll never talk to me again.
give him 2 more weeks…..if he wants u back he’ll come find u….dont rush it……and read ur question(the bolded one) out loud…..does it make sense to u?
If you love him tell him that you care about him and you will help him any way you can. Tell him maybe if he tells you what it is it will ease his mind. tell him to tell you and don’t worry because you will not lose respect for him since you care about him. If you want him to come back on his own then you shouldn’t contact him at all but give him time which I think he needs to get his head straight. Don’t rush him or put pressure on him but instead let him decide when he wants to come back and talk about things but when he does try to get him to tell you this bad thing and remember what I have said you should ask about that.
Men breakup at times to get space especially if nothing was really wrong in the relationship. Give him that space. It was meant to be it will. If you push him or force yourself on him it will push him away for good. If he doesn’t want you to know right now respect that. Even if you know the illusion that it is his secret is what keeps him his dignity right now. If you violate that you may never have a chance to repair it. He will come to you in his own time.
I think you should just consistently sending him emails to show that you’re around for him. Not to mention about anything to do with your relationship. Just some plain greetings daily and a little of your life everyday. Short emails will do as you don’t wanna stress him with your concerns. Act neutral and be simple with your words, don’t overdo it. Don’t plan strategy to get him back if you really love him. Guys don’t appreciate complicating stuff that much. I don’t know where you got those so called ‘rules’ from but forget about them. His life has been rough recently and as someone who cares, I think you shouldn’t think so much for yourself now. Don’t have to tell him that you’ll be there for him, just be there for him. Words sometimes don’t mean a shit. Action does. All the best…
*Don’t be irritating while showing that you care… He needs breathing space more than concerns from you now.
well if he told everyone else about his secret then oviously he do not want to put you through anything . he may think that if he tells you that’ll b your short cut at tryin to get back wit him an he don’t want you.
i agree w/ ieshia R. if this guy wants you to know, you will know. when we want comfort from a certain person, we’ll let them know whats happening….even if it takes longer 4 us to tell them than expected. dont sweat the guy. he needs to understand that you have a life & feelings to…if he can dismiss you the way he did for school, then you will have to dismiss him for other priorities….girl even if they’re not priorities….you are just as important!!! dont forget that.