My boyfriend said he wanted space, now he says we might not get back together, how do I change his mind?
We were outside during luch at schoo, it was pouring down rain and we hadn’t kissed in days. I knew something was wrong, he looked at me as I leaned to hug him. His eyes looked as if he was scared or hurt. I pulled back and asked what was wrong, he simply told me we needed a break and he needed space. I tryied to take in what he had said, frankly because I knew we hadn’t been normal since our last break up five days ealier, I couldn’t help but cry, he pulled me in to his shoulder and i immediatley soaked his sweater with tears. He pushed me away and looked at me like he was dying. I asked him if we would be together soon, and he said absoloutley. I wiped my eyes and he kissed my cheek, then he grabbed my hands and said he loved me, and walked away. I walked around the school, looking for comfort and assistance. I found one of my good friends and cried on her shoulder, before i knew it all of my good friends surrounded me and were rubbing my back and helping me. I told them what happened. When I got home that afternoon from school, I got on my laptop and saw he was online, I asked if we could talk, he said no. He said he didn’t want to get back together ever and that I always depressed him. It’s been about 3days since our break up, Last night he told me he thinks we’ll get back together, but not for awhile. I don’t want to wait a long time for him, how do I get him back sooner? Please help..!
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Tagged with: cheek • good friends • hadn • laptop • long time • luch • pouring down rain • rain
Filed under: How To Get Her Back
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This sounds like a very disfunctional relationship. You shouldnt have to force someone to be with you, they have to want it, and well he seems like he doesnt. Breaking up every couple days is definetly not normal, and if you are like this now what is it going to be like if you ever decide to marry??get divorced alot? i thinkyou should just stick with this break, dont pressure him, and let things go where they go.
listen if a dude said give his space then give him his fricking space GOSH!!!
you don’t. sounds like he has things on his mind that need to be worked out. you have to give him time to do that. if you don’t and try and push him to come back to you quickly then you would sound pushy and clingy to him and end up pushing him away for good
….i don’t believe that all actually happened….
Do not get back together! If he told you he wanted space and to break up, then why stay with him? He isn’t loyal at all, and doesn’t deserve a good person. Please listen and stay broken up.
Make him jealous thru another guy, and if he asks about it tell him it’s nothing serious
Accept things as the way they are.
Find another guy. This guy is a flake and will continue mentally abusing you for as long as he can. Trust me, I’ve done it.
go out with another man to make him jealous
You can’t change his mind. Give him his space and if he wants to come back, he will. If he doesn’t, he won’t. I know that’s not what you want to hear, but trying to change his mind will not yield good results in the long run.
Just respect what he wants. If he really likes you he will come back. If he doesn’t come back just move on. There are plenty of fish in the sea!
he wants space cuz hes fat
ask him what did you do that "depressed" him so you change and help him. maybe hes going through some tough times at home. just try to talk to him
give him his space, if he comes back then good…if not build a bridge and get over it. you’re probably better off.
ignore matt over there… what an ass…
he probably has alot on his mind sweety.. some guys just need time, they are too stubborn to admit whats wrong with them and just want to figure it out themselves.. give it a few days
instead of coming onto him like a girlfriend, go up to him and talk to him as a friend, let him have his space but still talk to him, about anything, just stay away from subjects hes not comfortable with
when he is ready he will talk to you about whats really on his mind
you cant force him to get back together with you. if he really does love you like he says he does then he will eventually get back together with you. you dont want to seem too clingy, desperate or helpless though. take control, don’t let him control your relationship. let him know (without actually saying it) that hes not the only guy in the world and that you are not gonna wait for him forever. try to make him a little jealous by ‘innocently’ flirting with other guys. men always want what they can’t have…keep that in mind….
Ok…him breaking it off is his fault. You are obviously upset, but the crappy part is that he is going to make up his own mind of when he wants to get back together, BUT on the positive side, you can move on. It sounds like you really care for him, but if he is gonna lead you on saying "we will get back together", then say "you wont" then he is pulling your chain. Sounds like he is trying to keep you around just in case. ITS NOT FAIR TO YOU. He may have someone else, and you dont need that. You need to give him his space, dont speak to him, and if you do be short winded so to speak (dont say much) and just put happy statuses on your myspace or facebook and let him know you are fine that will make him see wow I am not hurting her and maybe she is a good girl. If you act like you are not hurt it will get under his skin and let him know you arent hurting like he wants you too. Or it isnt affecting you and HE may come crawling back. I hope this helped!
I’m going to be very honest with you. It sounds like you’re in high school. I had a serious relationship in high school that I thought was going to last forever. Sadly, it doesn’t usually work out that way. People change at your age..a lot more than you think. Breaking up is never easy. I was even engaged a couple years ago, and when we broke up out of no where it was devastating. It took a couple months to get over and I didn’t handle it well at all. He said the same thing about going on a break, when really it was over for good. I called him everyday, and asked if we were really getting back together. Soon I just said, "forget it". I moved on dated around and 2 years later I’m with a guy that is fantastic! There’s always a chance that it may not work in every relationship. You have to be dependent on yourself a surround yourself with good friends. It gets easier trust me. It seems like he’s moving on and you need to do the same. Even if you feel like you need him in your life don’t act like it to him. It may seem like the world is ending, but trust me it’s just a bump in the road. Keep your chin up!
"How do I make him do something he doesn’t want to do when I have nothing he wants anymore?" Is that your question?
You get over the unhealthy and frankly arrogant notion that you can tell other people what to feel and when. Then you learn to stop using guys for affection and attention. Then, and only then, do you even think about building relationships with guys, and then only after you have gotten completely over this one.