Is My Ex Over Me Already, or does she want to be friends in hope we may get back? ?

Broke up with my long term girlfriend almost 3 months ago. We were deeply in love and cared for each other very much.

Unfortunately my girlfriend had a lot of trust issues, baggage and confidence problems stemming from her past. She was cheated on by her lesbian girlfriend whom she loved…who cheated on her with a man…and then two timed by another girlfriend she really liked…and then she was also disowned for a while by her parents when she came out. So as a result, she is quite messed up.

She always loved me and was kind…but when we got deep..she started to get insecure..and her fears of being rejected crept in. She started lying to me and exaggerating her sex past.

She started off lying about her sex past with men..to apparently relate to me ( I am bi)..which she later admitted was stupid. And then she started upping her sexual partner number and things she did with past partners to sound adventurous and experienced ‘in case I may lose interest in her once our honeymoon period was over’

Besides being confused and angry, i was also baffled why she would lie about her past after 2 years of being together. Why she would need to make her past sex life sound good..when our sex life already was good.

To her, she said it was too good to be true. So maybe she thought it would crumble, like everything good had- in her past.

Anyway, unfortunately i started not trusting her, questioned everything..she grew tired even though she knew it was her fault for lying! we both started fighting too much…because trust was broken.

But i still loved her. She lost energy…as did I. But she started having mild depression…feeling guilty ..not understanding her behaviour…she became exhausted. And lost interest in us. Many times I told her good bye.

But she cried and almost begged and i took her back..thinking i could believe in her again.

Anyway, 3 months ago she said she wanted out. She felt she had lost energy and felt it was not working. The argument took its toll…and she fell out of love. BUT still loved and cared for me. Weird concept.

She also said she hopes we can ‘become good friends soon as we shared a lot and were best friends and close”. I saw this as very dodgy! and a nice let down. But she also added that we need to become friends again she hopes…and see where that takes us. And if it leads somewhere..then she is open to it. But can’t promise anything.

I requested distance and she agreed, we both went overseas on our own trips recently…and we communicated briefly on email (friendly).

Anyway we started texting again. I told her I regret losing the one person I truly cared about. And she told me she doesn’t know what to say, but then says she “does miss me”

I asked her what she misses…and she said the “emotional and physical intimacy we had in the first 2 years, before we started arguing. That was something very special”

Anyway…she really wants to rebuild my trust and keen to become friends again considering that was broken

I asked her why now she is wanting to do this when she had that time to before…and she said that she had problems then and was exhausted. She also said she is working on herself and did a lot of soul searching.

Anyway, she does return my text messages very quickly and emails as well…are almost ultra friendly.

I am being very cautious ..because i don’t know what her intentions are.

I understand if we were to ever reconcile, we need to become friends again first. Cos how can u be lovers if u can’t be friends? and rebuild trust. but, do you think she still has feelings for me?

If an ex said to you, after 2 1/2 months that they missed u? and they said they were working on themselves etc and wanted to build your trust again…what would u think?

Is she over me already only after 3 months?

I do still love her and I want to know how to get her back.

I just don’t want to be mislea.


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