So this guy John that I have known for almost 3 yrs dated since July/August of 2009 until Feb 2010.We split up and had no communication for almost 2 months(non-speaking terms).Anyways I saw him around a couple of times at the same bar that he goes to where I was with(once 5 weeks ago or so) and once last week.Last week I asked him if he would like to grab a cup of coffee with me and catch up.I was trying to be civilized etc and just polite.He said "no" which I expected and accepted and I was about to walk away when he started to vent abt. the break up and his life and so forth.I listened to all of this for 20 minutes of so,he was raising his voice,I was telling him to calm down and next thing I know he kissed me and proposed to me.I accepted the proposal(stupid I know!) but hrs. later found out that my ex had a couple of drinks with his friends.Anyways him and I chatted,catched up,all his friends knew that we both were outside and talking.I was introduced that night to his dad who has lung cancer as his fiance.His dad was so happy that his son found someone to make him happy.The ex and I talked until 4am and 9am comes and the ex had some errands to run,I call my ex a couple of hrs later b/c we needed to talk and he calls back.He finally says that the prior night was us moving too fast and that we should remain good friends.I said sure yet even though I was not sure how I would take it.Monday of this week I called and asked him if he meant what he said,he played the dumb role and asked me what part and I told him the whole thing on Thursday.I guess he still remembered since he was not opened to talk about the subject and always said comments like how I should drop the subject and how he does not want any more drama.I asked him my final question which was how someone can say something and 12 hrs later have those words taken back.He still wanted to be friends he said after I asked him all those 2 questions.After that we did not speak for a couple of days.I called him 2 days ago and he was busy and I made it a 20 second convo saying that since he is too busy I will let him go(what he usually does anyways).Today I was polite to call and wish him happy Good Friday.We talked briefly and he had to go since he hates driving and talking at the same time.I told him that I could be his friend but I cannot.I still like him more than a friend so here is my question:do I sit down with him and tell him "John, look I know we have agreed that we ought to remain friends.But I cannot be your friend because I like you more than a friend.I understand if you cannot or do not return my feelings but I cannot be stuck here in limbo."….I just want to tell him how I really feel so I can get it off my chest.I had the guts to ask him to grab coffee and that took a lot of guts.I am not sure how to approach this and tell him how I still feel with out making him uncomfortable.

PS:

Him,our mutual friend Hanan and I were best friends before him and I started to date.Now since I am best friends with Hanan and she is good friends with him as well well it became complicated.Mine and his break up was supposed to be personal but expanded to include a large group of friends,our siblings,close and best friends,etc.Now he gave our mutual friend an ultimatum:that she has to choose who she wants to be friends with either him or I which I find stupid.My friend wants to stay out of the drama and same here except that he does not realize that he,himself is creating the drama or at least most of it now.My friend Hanan and I have stepped away from the whole drama about the break up yet the was the one who could not let go if he made our friend choose.


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Filed under: Ways To Get An Ex Back

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