do I need to break up with him? How do I fix this?
Okay, so I have been in a relationship for about a year and a half. Everything was great until around December, when I started getting these obsessive thoughts about falling out of love with him… It completely destroyed me. I felt like I was going crazy and losing everything good. The Thanksgiving before I went to visit my family in Oklahoma, and I hadnt seen my mom in about 10 years (she was/is a drug addict, etc) and she showed up, unannounced, with a kid that I didnt know about. I was in shock and I never really got upset about it. I actually thought that It was kind of funny. In fact, I never cried about my mom even when I was younger. I was alway numb to it. When I got home I had mono. During mono I got very depressed and I didnt even realize it.
The first day I was better I was with my boyfriend and I were talking and all of the sudden this rush of unfamiliarity and doubt rushed over me… I dont know why. Ever since then I have been obsessed with "what ifs" what if I dont love him anymore, what if we arent right for each other anymore, what if I dont even like him, what if I never loved him? And so on… I just obsess about it and then eventually convince myself that I dont care about him… and then it just goes away for a while. I see everything clearly and nothing feels forced, he doesnt annoy me much, and I just feel natural and like myself. I dont know what is going on. I just feel numb! I feel like I am sabotaging myself!!!
Oh, by the way, I am 18, and this is my first real relationship. I am on zoloft.
PLEASE HELP ME
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Tagged with: 10 years • break • Doubt • drug addict • falling out of love • Funny • love • mom • Mono • obsessive thoughts • quot • relationship • rush • shock • thanksgiving • zoloft
Filed under: Breaking Up Tips
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It sounds like it could be a reaction to your medication frankly. You’ll probably want to talk to the person who wrote the prescription, and see if the dosage needs to be adjusted.
You seem to realize that your feelings are unfounded. A certain amount of uncertainty is normal, but too much for no reason would indicate SOMETHING is going on. Maybe being with your mother brought up feelings that you’d forgotten about. Either way, talking to a psychiatric professional would seem to be the best thing to do.