Comments on: Can a marriage recover intimately and emotionally after an affair?Several months ago I discovered that my?

By: lovelyangel3340

lovelyangel3340 — Tue, 28 Jul 2009 07:16:34 +0000

Well first off here are a couple questions that you need to ask yourself about you him and the relationship.

Do you forgive him?
Did it hurt you?
Has it made you feel less of a person?
Why are you continuing the marriage?
Are you willing to try counseling?

To tell you the truth all that you have said sounds like you are currently in an unhealthy relationship. I understand that you want to try and savethe marriage but the true question is why did he falter in the first place and if you guys have been trying(though it seems the trying only goes one way) and has not worked out why try and push it. Why not try counseling, and if that does not woek maybe it would just be best to move on and find your self someone that loves you for you and accepts you and will cherish you? Someone that will not make you feel undesirable or deppressed?

By: katydid

katydid — Tue, 28 Jul 2009 07:16:34 +0000

You have an awful lot to get through to make your marriage work. I would advise counseling since doing this alone will be almost impossible.
I went through the same thing and although we both tried, I just couldn’t get over the fact that he cheated on me. Good luck and I hope it works out for you.

By: mwilson865

mwilson865 — Tue, 28 Jul 2009 07:16:34 +0000

If you have not already look into couples counseling and it sounds like be may need some individual counseling too. Marriages can survive affairs but it is very hard, it sounds like you want to forgive and move on. That’s great but it sounds like he has maybe not forgiven himself and his guilt is eating him up and this can cause problems with intimacy. It also sounds like he may have some self esteem issues, many men cheat initially to make themselves feel better about who they are. Try and be patient if you can, get some counseling and good luck!

By: ndnqt1966

ndnqt1966 — Tue, 28 Jul 2009 07:16:34 +0000

Yes a marriage can recover intimately and emotionally after an affair….But BOTH of you have to want it and work on repairing the damage to your marriage….the writing is on the wall dear….your husband isn’t wanting to put your marriage back together…..Why would you even want to try and salvage your marriage if your husband doesn’t want to be a team player?

By: southtxcouple

southtxcouple — Tue, 28 Jul 2009 07:16:34 +0000

Sweetie, what does your gut tell you? Trust your gut on this one. If your really wanting to make it work, try couples counseling. But from the sounds of it, it seems like he’s still in a relationship with this other person. It also sounds like he’s moved on but can’t be responsible enough (or man enough) to be honest with you. Or himself!!