Anyone want to vent with me?
I have been ttc for 8 months now. 12 dpo, 1 day away from expected af , and BFN this morning. I have no pregnancy symptoms or signs of AF showing but I know she is on her way. My DH and I are getting so discouraged and just feel like it’s never going to happen. Everytime I go on the pregnancy forum, I see questions about abortion and it just breaks my heart. I am already blessed with two boy’s, 9 and 10 years old from my previous marriage so I am thankful but I am soooo wanting number 3. I really wanted a girl but at this point, I don’t care what sex the baby would be, I just want another child so bad. Why is this so hard. My first child was unexpected, I was on bc…hence the first marriage and I went to get on bc again after my first child because the ex was cheating and guess what, I was pregnant. So even though I got a divorce while I was pregnant, I am so glad I conceived my two boys but I just don’t get it, why is it so hard this time around. My dh was checked and his sperm count is great and all of my test came back good, so I am at a loss. I’m sorry, I guess I am just extremely frustrated and looking for some words of encouragement. And god bless you ladies who have been trying for a year and more. My heart goes out to you, I don’t know how you deal with the disappointment of not conceiving month after month.
Congratulations emma’s mommy…twins, you must be so excited:)
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Tagged with: 10 years • abortion • dh • Disappointment • divorce • emma • god • heart • marriage • Mommy • Number 3 • pregnancy forum • pregnancy symptoms • signs • sperm count • twins • two boys • Words Of Encouragement
Filed under: Ways To Get An Ex Back
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AMEN babe. Im right there with you. I must say that I have found comfort amongst other TTC’s and it has helped me get through a very difficult year. I’ve been married for 2.5 yrs and we decided to wait to have kids until we were settled and had stable jobs. So I took myself off the pill last November and we just had sex for fun, no pressure of TTC at all. Then in May 2008 I feel pregnant and it was a very pleasant surprise. In fact I was soooo slow that I initially read the test wrong and threw it in the trash – I saw two lines but one was faint and so I thought that was a negative, my hubby later took the test of the trash and was like "you realize that you ARE pregnant right?" We were sooo excited! Unfortunately all that excitement came with so much pain. I lost the baby at just 9 weeks and had a D&C June 30th. I knew things weren’t looking right after my first ultrasound the tech scared the crap out of me when she was unable to locate the sac. We were referred to a specialist who just confirmed my fears – my pregnancy had stopped and was reversing :*( It was sad and I was angry. Angry at God angry with everyone. I couldn’t understand why it happened to me. At the same time I found out I was pregnant – I had several friends and a sister-in-law who were also pregnant. of course they are still still pregnant and due at the end of this year/beginning of next year. I will never know the answer to my question "why did this happen to me" and I still get teary eyed when I talk about it. It hurts ALOT. So I started coming into this forum to seek advice. My doctor told me to wait at least 3 months before trying again. So this is my first active month of trying. I was diaappointed last month b/c for a split second I thought I was pregnant since AF was late.
This month I have driven myself INSANE with taking my temperature, checking CM, charting adn trying to pin point ovulation, taking OPK’s. It’s almost like sex has become a chore and isn’t even fun anymore. Means to an end. My husband tries to comfort me but he will never truely know how I feel and how badly I want a baby too. Its like when you REALLy want something you can’t have it – but yet it seems that everyone around you has it and gets it soo easily. It annoys me when I see a 14 yr old impregnanted by her 24 yr old bf and she is thinking about abortion. Like its just something easy to toss aside. But thats how life works – the people who are careless get whatever their hear desires. I honestly don’t think I can handle another month of obsessing over body temps and CM and what not. I don’t know how the women who have been trying for years can still have hope every month after disappointment. I admire their strength and wish I could be as strong as they are. Sorry for rambling and thanks for listening. Just know that your not alot babe *hug*
I am sorry you can’t get all that you’re hoping for. It doesn’t seem fair that women (and men) who would make excellent parents get so fustrated and denied. Meanwhile, women (and men) who don’t even want children are popping up pregnant and get rid of it.
Vent all you need. I empathize.
just keep trying! thats the fun part!
I can relate to you atleast a little. I became pregnant at age 18 with my first daughter, unexpected pregnancy, her father had been battling leukemia and was told he could never have kids. But I was pregnant with his child. And we broke up the day I found out I was pregnant. He just walked out of my life and has never been involved ever since. After the birth of my daughter in June 2005 , I met a guy who I fell in love with. And we tried to conceive for almost 2 and a half years. We went to fertility experts and everything. And we found out a few months ago that now we are expecting twin girls in February. It was very hard on our relationship and it was draining emotionally trying to have a baby and not being able to. All I can tell you is don’t give up. It may take a few more months but just stay hopeful. I will be sending baby wishes your way.
Awww! I’m sorry to hear you are so frustrated. I know how hard it is to go month after month with no positive. We stopped trying last year and just began again. I too am expecting af (yesterday or today) but no signs at all. Infact the symptoms I am having are not typical of af. I tested today too…big fat negative! I did want a girl too but now I don’t mind what sex the baby is. Just don’t give up hun…it will happen.
It’s definitely tough. I’m due with baby # 1 at the end of November, after 1 year and 2 months of trying to conceive. It was so hard to read the questions that people posted that they conceived by mistake and are seeking abortion. I felt like crying "How could you?! There are women, like me, who cry and pray every day for a baby and you want to throw yours away?" You should know that home pregnancy tests are very often unreliable, inaccurate, and do not detect the pregnancy hormone early enough (especially when you’re TTC and dying to know as soon as possible). The best way to go is to go to your doctor tomorrow or the day after for a blood test. Blood tests are a lot more accurate and detect the pregnancy hormone a lot earlier. So . . . there is still hope for you this cycle. I feel for you and wish you lots of luck. I hope you get that wonderful news you’re waiting for!
I haven’t even been trying as long as you and I know exactly how you feel. I thought that it would be so easy and I would be a couple months into my pregnancy by now, but, no such luck. And I’m always depressed to see AF rear her ugly head month after month. I have to keep telling myself not to get discouraged it will happen when it’s time but it is still just so emotionally draining when you’re TTC. I am sending tons of baby dust your way and I’m hoping that this is our month (if it’s mine I’ll find out on my birthday! How fun would that be?!)
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~BABY DUST~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Brandy you are preaching to the choir lol, we all understand your frustration. I love all of my fellow ttcers and I really hate when people come on here and brag about how easy it was for them to get pregnant and now they are looking into abortion because the "baby daddy" decided he wasn’t into it or the little teenage girls whining about getting pregnant because they had unprotected sex. Then you have women like us who are settled and desperatly want a baby and nothing. We have to worry about cervical positon and mucus, medications BBT and charting. We all know how you feel and I hope you find some comfort in that.
i know just how hard it is! i fell pregnant at the end of june and 4 weeks ago me and my fiancee went to our first scan! we were sooo excited we told every1 we were expecting! such a happy time!
untill we were told our TWINS had no heart beats!
Absolutely devastated!!
we were booked in for a d-c 2 days later! we were distraught! even more so when we over heard the girl next door was having the same op as me but because she didn’t want her baby! its just so upsetting that its easy come easy go for some people but US the 1s who really want nothing more find it so hard!
any way enough of the ranting! good luck to every1 ttc! hope we all fall soon! and when the time is right! love 2 all! soph! ***
So sorry to hear your story. Here’s a place full of ladies who are in the same position as you. They would be happy to vent with you. Good luck.
http://www.fertilethoughts.com/
Brandi,
1st: Hugs to you!!!!!
2nd: I’m not sure if you’ll find comfort in these words but maybe God is taken just that much longer to perfect your little one. I don’t want to sound like all these women on here telling us to just have fun and not to think about it. Because as you and I both know it’s just not that easy! I tell my self day in and day out that God is perfecting our little one and thats why it’s taking so long. He’s molding our child to be so special to my DH and I that we may just have to wait just a bit longer.
I know it hurts to see that BFN everytime but this month isn’t out for you! Maybe it’s just too soon to know.
God is just spending alittle more time on your little one! Try to remember that.
Hugs brandi!!!!!!
i hear ya, this coming cycle will be our 7-8 month trying and we are going to see dr. bob my ob on the 27th, im not really to stressed out this cycle so far though-kinda wierd-i used to be such a freak about it.
anyways, i am 4-5 dpo now so i still got a little ways to go.
hopefully our af’s dont show this time around.
good luck and lots and lots and lots of sticky baby dust your way