For the longest time now, I find fault with how my MIL raised my husband, how she and my husband’s other sisters use my husband for favors, and how they pretend that they like me.
When we’re all together, his mom says that he blows all of his money. She also says taht she wishes she could go back to school, but she can’t because she’s a single, working mom. My husband says comments like "You hate them, they hate you." Whenever I mention how I don’t like them/ what they’re doing. He tells his mom that I think they hate me, and she denies it. I’m fed up with whatever is going on behind my back. My husband claims that they don’t talk shyt on me, but I think everyone does at one point in time. I even heard my husband say that his mom said, "What’s up her ass?" When we got in a fight at her house, and he said that she stated, "What, can’t you stand your wife?"
Sometimes it feels like a constant battle for my husband. Why can’t I have him to myself? When we first were married, we had a nice 1 bedroom apartment, we spent a lot of time together, he didn’t talk to his mom (she was a b!tch and threw him out) and I felt like I had peace and didn’t have to worry. Now that I had a baby and lived with them for 4 months (moved out in Feb. things just keep getting worse though) it’s like a living hell, no matter how far I live from them!
Are they gossiping about me? How do I find out??? Their phone conversations are usually 3 minutes or less at any given time, but he does go to her house once a week to talk or do favors for her.
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I’ll give everyone some details to better answer my question. I am twenty, "he" is twenty-two, and we have zero contact. I met him through my husband (separated) in 2008. My husband came home one night and asked if "he" could move in because "he" needed to "get on his feet". I had met him a few times before and even went on double dates with him and his girlfriend. He was at my wedding. He moved in about a month and a half after my husband and I married. "He" and I became friends. My husband fucked up REALLY BAD and ended up moving out for a while. "He" and I became very close. He even moved into my room (we lived in a one-bedroom apartment) and slept in the same bed as me. We NEVER did ANYTHING past a friendship though. I HATE facing people when I sleep, so when he came to bed I would turn over. He would sigh, or laugh at me, or something. We would cuddle. He told me to touch him once, lol, but I refused. We then got into a discussion about how neither of us would make the first move. I found out I was pregnant (my husband’s of course) and I updated my status on MySpace (my husband and I had been trying to get pregnant for a long time before my marriage crashed). My status said "our baby". In a message "he" sent me, "he" said "When I saw that status I wished you were talking about me and you". Well…lets skip ahead. We rented a new apartment and my husband moved back in. "He" also got back with his ex-girlfriend (on again off again always). We drifted apart. I remained separated from my husband. One night, we were drinking and "he" kept sticking his face in mine (after he pulled me into the hall to talk) and I kissed him. "He" left with a friend and texted me while he was gone. I think "he" said "he" missed me but I am NOT positive. Well "he" has been saying "I love you" since the second double date (always in a text) so that is nothing new. Well we came close to having sex twice. The first time I think "he" muttered something like "I don’t know if this is right" and "he" went to the bathroom (we had been drinking…we did that a lot…lol). The second time "he" said "I love you" out loud like five or six times but then "he" passed out. So I covered him and went to bed in my own room. "He" ran down every guy I showed interest in. Yet, I wasn’t allowed to get jealous. "He" went through my phone numerous times. "He" found a text from my husband that had a picture of him and our son that read "This is what you have" and another text that had a picture of "him" and my son that read "Not this". "He" sent the same picture text of him holding my son that read "I want this" and he chose my ring tone "I stay in love" to send with it. My friend asked why he would send that and he said he was kidding. I told him I was in love with him and he said "I can’t love you like you love me, only love you deeply" then he said "I’m not saying I can’t get that way with you, but I feel I never had a chance when you had *****(husband) and ****** (son)" Then he said "Well, you showed me you loved me the other night because you were ready to have sex and you only do that with people you love, I know you, and I was ready and probably would have had I not passed out and I only do that with people I love" (CONFUSING!!!) If I would get distant he would bitch, but if I tried to get closer he would push me away, etc. Like if I never texted, he would bitch but when I texted he made me feel like a pain in the ass. Once he brought a friend home and I said "I love your’ accent!" and once his friend went to the bathroom, he goes "I love your’ accent!" ( mocking me ) He always did shit like that, push me away then bitch I was close, get jealous but hate when I did, but then sending texts saying I love you and talking about sex but then AHHHHH!!! I am going insane!!!!!! Well, recently he got angry that I made a picture collage and passed it to every friend at the party. He freaked!!! He said he was mad I put so many pictures of him passed out drunk on it and basically went psychotic on me. I said I was sorry and it was just a joke that EVERYONE was having fun with. Well then a LOT of bullshit came out. He said he had been miserable living with us since the fourth month (at this point we had lived together over a year AND like three of those months were just us – no husband), I was lazy and he did everything cleaning-wise (he never cleaned!!!), his friends "see right through me", I lost my chance a long time ago, ETC ETC ETC. Well then we worked everything out and were on civil terms, but I was still hurt. Well then another fight happened (I have no idea how this time) and he moved out. He came to get some things, my husband asked for his keys, he said no and said horrible things to my husband, then my husband chased him down and punched him like eight times, now my husband has court, and he HATES me. He told me to lose his number, refuses to talk to me, and told me to stay out of his life. He posts statuses about loving being "free", yet he a
also replies to MY statuses through his (why is he on my profile? he deleted me after that fight…). So…what the hell? Did he love me? Why is he being like this? He admitted through a text I am paying for my husband’s actions. I don’t deserve this!!! Why is he doing this? Why?!?! A friend called me and said she asked him if we ever did anything and he said "No that stupid bitch was on top of me kissing me and I told her to go away". Well I was on top of him and kissing him and he did excuse himself to end it, but he did NOT push me away or even excuse himself til deep into it. I sent him a text "No that stupid bitch was on top of me kissing me and I told her to go away? Want me to forward the texts saying "And I almost slept with you but I never hurt you like ***** (husband)?" He didn’t reply. He sent a text bitching the other day how my smoking was horrible and wrong I wouldn’t even quit for my own son and blah blah blah. I replied "…and shut the fuck up about my smoking! Its MY
choice and more like I wouldn’t quit for YOU. See? Never were worth it." And he stopped replying and got silent again. WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON WITH HIM???????!!!!!!!!!!!!! just met, friends, VERY close friends, fling?, HATES ME?!?!? Are you fucking kidding? This sucks! Please help!!!
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My boyfriend and I broke up on Thursday. We’d been dating and living together nearly two years. Within three months of meeting, he proposed, but I knew he was making a hasty decision and said that we should get to know one another better.
Almost two years later, I am prepared for a more serious commitment, but he isn’t. I wanted to marry him, but he couldn’t say with certainty that he wanted to be in any committed relationship anymore (including our present situation), so I left him. I feel that it will only hurt me more if I wait for him to be ready to commit. I feel like I deserve a man ready for commitment.
We live in a one-bedroom apartment. It’s nearly impossible for me to get over him (or cry, or scream) when he’s in the same apartment. How can I miss him if he isn’t gone?
It’s killing me, but I’m trying to separate myself from him entirely. We’re not speaking unless necessary, but I’m terrified of coping when he finally does find his own place, leaving me in an empty house. I’m also hurting knowing that he’ll probably nail the first girl he can as soon as he’s gone.
Most of all, though, I feel like a failure for not being good enough to make him want to settle down. How could he change his mind, and be so calm about it, when just weeks ago he was crying at the prospect of losing me?
Has anyone gone through this? Can anyone help me move on? And does the "distance yourself & he’ll come to his senses" thing fail-proof? He seems completely fine about the whole thing.
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My boyfriend and I have been together for a good 7 months. He has a 3 year old daughter whose mother hates me, and up until a few weeks ago my boyfriends mother was very hot and cold with me aswell. Basically we had a fight infront of his child and he flipped out on me and said i was turning him into a monster,. Mind you we were in the process of getting a 2 bedroom apartment which I now live in alone. He broke it off saying that we should only see eachother when his daughter is not there, I feel as though he should want to get out of his parents house at 26 and give his daughter a better life. His family is way too into our relationship and now both families have tainted opinions. He came over yesterday and told me he hated me, that he never wanted to be with me again, heard i cheated on him (which is a lie told to him by his ex’s uncle) anyway he basically cut me up. I told him I wanted my TV back that i bought for his bedroom bc it was supposed to come with us to our apartment, that turned into a huge argument over a 2 way and both of our families were yelling in the background. I talked to him late at night and he and i were both crying, we feel as though we finally understand how to make our relationship work but now it might be too late, do i really want to be with someone whose family blames everything on their sons girlfriends and scares every girl away? and do I want to be with a guy who is still taking orders from his ex *(who HAS a new boyfriend by the way) He told me to call him after work today, and he is getting his daughter tomorrow, i want to see him tonight, i miss him so much, but so much damage has been done. what should i do?
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