Ex Boyfriend started talking to me after no word for a year! How do I make him want me back for good?

last i saw him or talked to him was last December. We have been broken up for 2 years now but still saw eachother even after i moved out of his place and 3 hours away. I moved back in to town last november. We still occasionally saw eachother, but only every few months… Just last week he text me out of the blue. Telling me he got a DUI back in january and had been sober for 6 months. He thought not talking to me would make me forget him but "how could i?" I love the guy! He wanted me to fill him in on my life, and what ive been up to… I played cool the best I could, but inside I was going crazy!!! :) Does he want to maybe start seeing eachother again? I know we have to take things slow. The diversion classes and AA meetings made him look at himself and figure out what he wants to be. He told me he wants to be a better person and have a better family relationship. This guy is a bullshitter and total guy…. doesnt express himself at all like he did that night he was texting me. I truely care for him ALOT! and have missed him terribly… I dont want to mess up this possible second chance to get him back. He invited me to a party he may be having in a couple weeks and im STOKED! but also nervious as HELL cuz its been so damn long! I need some feedback and ideas… Hes a Leo and Im a Cancer, if anyones in to the zodiac….. THANKS!

~S~
Thanks for the responses so fast! I just started doing this site. I think its AWESOME! ~~~~ I wanted to add that him an I had never had a serious relationship AT ALL before we met and started dating. We took everything slow. I was 19 and he was 20. Both working an independent… but i was so ready to be serious and i think he got scared. ~~~~ I do not plan on staying the night at this lil party hes having and If i cant drive Im pitchin my own tent… NO SEX. we allready know its good. LOL OMG i juist cant wait to see him. But… IM COOL… im cool…. I have to be….
Oh…. after i asked him why he couldnt talk to me when he was sober, he answered that, he wanted to, but was worried about my emotions. He knows how much i care for him, cuz i never let him forget it. I had drunk dialed him plenty of times throughout the year and text him, yet nothing til now. I thought I may have just been digging the hole bigger by all the messeges…. but they were from my heart. My favorite qoute is: ~~" IF YOU CANT HANDLE ME AT MY WORST, YOU SURE AS HELL DONT DESERVE MY BEST!"~~ That i think goes for both of us in this situation. LOL


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Is my boyfriend still in love with his ex?

I’ve been with my boyfriend for over a year (and been very good friends for about 2 and a half). I just found out something from my boyfriend’s ex girlfriend (I’ll call her Robin to minimize confusion). He told me a couple of times when we were having fights that maybe it would be a good idea to go talk to Robin to see what was wrong with their relationship to improve our own.

Anyway, this situation is complicated. They dated for maybe a little more than 6 months off and on about a year before he knew me. So it’s been like 3 years since they were together. She ended up having leukemia. Her step father is actually my boyfriend’s older brother (which is the reason he said they "couldn’t be together").

He broke up with her 3 times while they were off and on. The first time it was because of difficulties with her being allowed to drive to his house, and his older brother telling him how to treat her. Robin dated someone else. Then she was diagnosed with cancer, and ended that relationship. She went through chemo, lost her hair. Then he started, as she said, "being nice to her", and they got back together. She said she thought it was great. But she was in the hospital and 3 months after they were together that time, he broke up with Robin, because his past love (the one he calls his first true love), came back, and he couldn’t pass that up. So he was with that girl 2-3 months. Then this girl’s father told her he wasn’t good enough for her, and they broke up and he came back to Robin.

She told me at this point "i’m not retarded" and hinted that they ended it pretty soon after that.

My boyfriend says that they ended the relationship because of the new family situation, her step father being his older brother. But when we first got together, he said that he would say I love you, but he didn’t mean it the way he meant to me, like it didn’t mean as much when he was with Robin. He always says "she lost her hair but I didn’t care". And he always talked about it like he fell out of love with her and she was the one that loved him.

I took him up on his offer and contacted her when we were having a big fight. She told me that one time when we weren’t speaking, and we were on a break, that he had texted "I still love you to her". She said that she told him they could never be together, and she cut contact from him.

I told him, and he said he didn’t know how to tell me in a way i would understand. And he told me "anything you need to make you feel better, i’ll answer anything". He was genuine and told me that he was kinda glad I found out because it bothered him to keep it from me, what he had told Robin that night. I asked, and he said that he still loved her, and I asked him when he was going to move on. And he said "You don’t just forget someone". Her cancer came back recently, and he came to me after seeing her in the hospital and just said "I need someone to talk to" and he couldn’t handle seeing her with all the machines. I told him he should let her know how much he cares, because it may be too late.

We’ve been talking and at first he was understanding, but as I kept asking he would get irritated then calm down and be understanding. But he told me that he doesn’t love anyone the way he loves me, (he clarified and told me, that he loves me more than he’s loved any other girl). He’s told me that before. He’s went through the talk of all his different relationships, and I’ve asked him that. And he thought for a second and told me that I mean more to him than anyone.

After I was upset, I asked him what I could do for him to be happy with me, and he told me that he just wants me to be happy, and he hugged me really tight. He just tells me not to worry about it, but I still do.

I feel like I dont’ have his whole heart. Is there someone that’s been through this? Where it bothers you that your partner still loves their ex? Is it ok? Will he get over it. They obviously will never be able to be together. And it’s like those two relationships ended not from his decision but from something beyond his control. I’m the only one that’s been like no-strings-attatched.

He also said that if his brother didn’t marry her mom, they would still be together. But according to her, she wasn’t gong to stick around.

I asked him that if that impossible situation suddenly went away, and she told him she still loved her, would he leave me for her. And he said, he wouldn’t just leave me for no reason, he’d have to have a good reason.


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I tried to get back together with my ex cancer boyfriend and He seemed he wanted me but we aren't talking now?

About a 2 weeks and a month ago, I broke up with my cancer boyfriend and now I really regret it and I really want him back. What do I do?
He isn’t seeing anyone else and he still likes me but I’m not sure what is going on.
I texted him and told him that I really missed him and realized how much he meant to me and he said he missed me but he was going to need time to think about this. 2 hours later, he texts me and were talking all normal and how much we cared for each other and I though we were going to get back together, but when I saw him in person and tried to talk to him , he completely avoided me and when he sees me, he avoids me.
I’m a Capricorn and he is a Cancer.


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HELP! do u think there is there a chance my ex cancer man will get back together with me?

im a scorpio and my ex brad is a cancer. im in my 20s, hes in his 30s. we were dating seriously about 4 months. i was spending the night at his house 4 nights a week and he took me out to dinner all the time, took me to meet his parents and met my parents, bought me a monthly gym membership and put it in his name. treated me like a queen!! HE EVEN DISCUSSED MARRYING ME!! never been treated so good before! my family loved him! everything was great until he broke up with me a month ago because he said things were moving too fast like me pressuring him to move me in with him and sum little drama. wen we broke up a month ago he texted me this………."i am done! i don’t want any relationships right now. im only wanting to have fun! i did like you alot. but takin a break from dating. and u probably should also. we had alot of drama and need time to get over that stuff! things were too much too fast. need my space" ive been texting him a couple times a week and he usually ignores me since we broke up but this time he texted me back the day before yesterday saying "im takin a break from dating, but if you want to get together for some fun, we can and thats it. if not, dont text me. i hope u find someone else soon!" then i texted him back saying that i dont want only sex or anyone else and i wont being seeing him for jus sex and I LOVE HIM, i want to be with him. then he texted back and said …."i cant give u that. sorry! i liked u alot but not ready for relationship right now. im not dating anyone else. if you date other guys, take it very slow!! never know we may date again oneday."

NOW HE HASNT TEXTED ME BACK SINCE….
IM SO CONFUSED! HES GIVING ME MIXED SIGNALS! WHAT AM I SUPPOSE TO THINK OR DO? I LOVE HIM AND I WANT TO BE WITH HIM SO BAD…ADVICE PLEASE.

THANKS SO MUCH!! ;)


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An Annoying Ex and A Close to As Annoying Future MIL?

So my fiancee dated a girl, Olivia, a long time ago (5 years ago), it didn’t end well – my fiance broke up with her because he just didn’t have the same feelings for her and they just werent connecting. His Mom (Lisa) really really really liked Olivia and she felt bad for the girl when they broke up because Olivia was heart broken and upset. Olivia now lives in New York and we are in Wisconsin.

I have been with my fiancee for a few years now. My future mother in law expects her son’s wives/girlfriends/fiancees to think she is just the most wonderful thing and to almost be afraid of her and bend at her every whim. I am not this kind of girl and I believe in standing up for myself and being reasonable. Thus has created a rift with the mother in law because she wants me to be afraid of her and kiss her feet. She has gone as far as asking me not to invite my fiancee’s step mother to the wedding, and she also requests that she have SPECIAL things at our wedding (things not even MY parents are getting), she also texts her son and says "Who is your favorite? Your fiancee or your mother?" she isn’t joking and does it with mean/bi*chy intentions.

Olivia has since been back in the picture, calling his mom, telling her how beautiful she is, talking to her often, she has started to talk to his brothers and his aunt/uncles again. She knows that my fiancee and I are together and are getting married. She tells my future MIL that she does it because she knows it pisses me off. Olivia and I have never met. My MIL thinks this is funny and eggs it on. In return she tells Olivia how much she misses her too and how she hopes she visits soon – and that she can see how much more beautiful she gets every day. This is getting ridiculous. Each time getting more and more inappropriate.

Yesterday, my fiancee’s grandfather was put in the hospital for treatment of his cancer. Olivia asked my future MIL to call her so she could talk to grandpa and grandma and tell him how much she loves them and that she misses them. Apparently she has also bought a plane ticket to come visit the family.

I think this is completely inappropriate. I think everything UP to this point has been inappropriate but my MIL thinks that I just feel "threatened" by Olivia … and that her and Olivia are just "friends"

I have let it slide to an extent, but I have had it.

How do I deal with my increasingly pushy future MIL and my fiancees even MORE inappropriate ex girlfriend? This is hurting our relationship – and hurting me.

My future MIL recently admitted "I dont know you that well" … my response was "maybe if you stopped talking to his EX you COULD get to know me" … she laughed it off … I wasn’t kidding.

Thanks – and HELP!
Thanks for everyone’s responses … I am committed to him and I love him more than the world … we are moving about 10 states away from his mother so I am hoping it helps. I just graduated from College, I graduated with Honors, I have done more for her son than she does or ever did.
He is afraid to hurt her feelings but I don’t think he understands that means hurting me.

We talk about it often – and he hates that his mom and I can’t get along – and I hate it to – I wish she would take the time to get to know me.

Back to the drawing board. But thank you thank you thank you for responding :)


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