Went to mediation with my ex because I want to increase my parenting time?

Currently, I have 1 and 1/2 days with my two children, so I filed a motion with the court to increase my parenting time. The judge sent us to mediation. After talking with the mediator for 2 and a half hours, he sent a report to the court recommending I increase my parenting time to 3 1 /5 days (so about half) with my children. He even ended up calling my ex a drama queen and she needs to stop. As well as using derogatory remarks against me on public forums with her friends, which he included on his report.

Naturally, my ex is not agreeing to this. She thinks I should have hardly anytime with our children because "they are always crying to here about how much they hate it over here" and blah blah blah.
Well I don’t see this. In fact, when I see my kids they run to me with big hugs and smiles. We play games and spend quality time together (which to me, 1 and a half day is just not enough, I love my kids) They don’t seem at all intimidated. Sure, they get in trouble and get restriction and are given healthy food at dinner and not have a over abundance of junk food. They are expected to clean their rooms and help with chores around the house. But heck, what kid wouldn’t complain about that? I did when I was a kid. Are these the things our kids are crying about to their mother when they go back to her house? Are they being quized so she can make remarks about me on puplic forums about how much of a jerk I am? I wonder.

All I want to be is a father and have more time with my kids so that I can be a part of their growng up. I do not go about complaining about my ex on public forums (I do go to counseling to do that)

So my question is, can she actually prevent me from getting my increase even though we have a mediators report? I do everything I am supposed to be doing, I house them, feed them, clothe them, make sure they do weel in school, go to school events, and spend time with them. Her only complaint is what she and the kids talk about me. Which I think she should not be doing because she is not a tir party to this. She has a lot of hostility towards me and of course if the kids bring up one thing, she can repond to them making it ten times worse.



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What would you have done to save your marriage?

There was a time I would have done or overlooked or to be honest not only agreed but I would have enjoyed the other side of the woman I was married to, but now I don’t think I would answer the phone to save the marriage. You kick a dog enough times and he leaves…
Just to answer the lket me guess group.
We were under twenty-five when married…
Made over 6 digits for income…
Shared chores most of the time…
Lasted eighteen yrs
Had two children
We went to church regularly..
We forgot to communicate but we had something that was unique….
Dog Owner??? Whats up with the prostitution thing? I never betrayed my wedding vows, she did at every turn, even posting up on web sites for sex and having sex with both of my brothers one of which is the father of her baby due on our wedding anniversery…


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married but wife has lost so much love..?

Ok … I have been married for over 20 years and we have 2 boys a home and so much more but my wife has fallen out of love with me and there is no sex for over 1/ 2 years. I would like to know what i can do to help her fall back again so she will want to have sex again. She may have sex is i pressure her but she would not love me back or go through the motions. I know women or emeotional and they need to fill good and love there man to want to have sex. Its not just a chore for her just because we are married. I want her to love me again. She loves are kids so much that i dont think shhe has any room for her husband. She never wants to do anything together or go out on a date or a getaway with out the kids . Only if the kids are with us. So there is not much i can do to spend time with her. I help at home and all the chores and i give her back rubs and foot messages and i tell her she is attractive all the time. She is a good cook and a great mom and all is good. There are things she complains about and i do listen but i just dont wish to change so much that i am not the same as i have always been. How can i regain her love again.??? She is 43 and i am 50….


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How do I reconect with my husband, I think I'm fallin out of love for him…Advice please!?

We married 1 1/2 years ago. He was 23 I was 18. We got married because I was pregnant.
Ok so i’m 20 years old now with a 11 month old baby. I finished high school and my intention was to go to college but I was having problems at home and on top of that I got pregnant so We moved in together.
I still love my husband and he loves me, we have had some problems but we are working on our marriage, we are trying to make it better day by day. Ok so lately I’ve been wondering if I really want to be living this life, I’m just turn 20 years old and i’m already stuck home doing chores and taking care of a baby. I love my daughter with all my heart but sometimes I wonder if my husband is the right gut for me. A lot of times I find myself wondering What if I had gone to college maybe I would have found someone that was more like me. someone that had the same goals as me. Somtimes I miss going out with my friends and having a good time , I sincerly really miss the single life! I feel like I missed out on so much. My husband was my first and only boyfriend and he is the only man I’ve dated. I feel really bad because I don’t want to make a stupid decision and hurt my daughter in the long run. I would like for her to grow up with her daddy, his a good man and very loving towards my daughter, she’s his world.
So my question is; how do I fall in love with my husband all over again? It’s not that I don’t love him it’s just that I don’t find him intresting anymore…’
Thanks in Advance!


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I feel like I have fallen out of love with my husband…?

My hubs and I met in high school. We dated 6 years before getting married. We waited until after college. We’ve been married for 7 years and we have 2 children under the age of 3.

We’ve been happily married until our children came. I LOVE our babies more then anything. We were always the couple that were touching or kissing, holding hands….

After the birth of our first child I tried really hard to not put my hubs on the back burner, but after awhile I realized I was paying more attention to the baby then him. I tried to fix it and we were ok for a while. Then my hubs started working on a “hot rod” car that he bought to fix.

My son and I basically spent every weekend w/ my mom, even spending the nights b/c hubs was in the gararge from sun up to sun down. My hubs never gave me a break to sleep in. He did care for our son when I specifically asked him too.

Soon I went back to work full time not getting off until 6pm. It was usually 645pm before I got home with the baby while hubs had been home since 4pm. He didn’t help w/ the chores or doing dinner, always working on the car. We grew distant and I actually started taking antidepressants b/c I was so unhappy.

I tried a MILLION times to talk to him about how I felt, he said he was sorry and would help out for a few days… then back to the old ways. I started feeling better when he sold the car and came back to us. I got prego again and was put on bedrest w/ our daughter at 28 weeks. I quit work and stayed home all day w/ our toddler son (ON BEDREST). Again, not much help from hubs unless I specifically asked and had to ask a lot.

After our daughter was born he had 2 weeks off-spending most of the time on projects around the house and helping only when I asked.

He went back to work and worked 1 month straight with no days off (at a power plant) working 16 hour shifts. We never saw him. He came home to shower and sleep only. So I had to take care of a newborn and toddler by myself. I was resentful towards him for not helping out, when he could have asked off…. especially when he decided to go hunting out of state and asked off a day from work!!
Now our daughter is over a year old and I feel nothing for him. I’m angry a lot of the times for him not helping me out, for not giving me a break. I’ve stuffed my face w/ food and gained weight, I don’t care about myself at all. I have no self esteem b/c he’s also been hiding an addiction to porn all these years. I’ve caught him looking at it online so many times and he’s promised to stop, but always looks again soon. I feel like I’m a failure as a woman and don’t want him to even look at me.

Everything makes me mad at him and everything irritates me. We haven’t had sex in over 2 months and before that it was 1 month for sex.

Tell me what to do! How do I get those feelings back? I don’t want a divorce. I’m a Christian and have struggled with these feelings. I know I should love my hubs. He’s a great provider, he is great with the kids, he’s nice to me. I should be so thankfull.

I remember what it was like to love him. I just don’t know how I got off track. I’ve talked to him until I’m blue in the face, HUNDREDS of times. Things are good for a few days, then back to normal. I’m tired of living this way, tired of stuffing my face full of food (as my only comfort), tired of feeling inferior to those porn girls he looks at, tired of having no self esteem, tired of crying. I don’t want to leave him, I just want to feel better and love him again.
Checkita: My mom tells me the same thing. She says marriage is the hardest when the babies are small and things will get better when they are older. I just don’t know where I went wrong. I always thought we would have a great marriage, we used to talk about everything…..

Now I don’t say anything half of the time b/c I don’t want to be a “nag”. Thank you!
Miko: He’s always looked at porn, since high school. I just didn’t know until after we were married. I am not taking any anti-depressants-I stopped when I got prego w/ our daughter.


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