During the holiday season I like to get liquored up, dress in a monkey suit and tour the department stores, trying to get my picture taken with Santa. Nine times out of ten I get thrown out by security, but that one time I got a photo vomiting on Santa whilst being restrained by the elves, makes up for it all. That’s the magic of Christmas.
My boyfriend and I have been dating for 5 years. Since we started dating his mother always warned him that I’d "trap" him into staying with me. We now have a 15 month old daughter together and his mother totally denies her grandchild. She wants me to get a paternity test because we are not married so she’s just so sure that my daughter is in no way related to her son, even though she looks like all of her children. My daughter never got a Christmas or birthday present from her. Also, his mother treats him like he’s 14. He is 26! For example, he is "not allowed" to have a cell phone. Seriously? So, I’ve agreed to get this test done because nothing would make me more satisfied than to shove the results in her face. She told my mom that she should have dragged me by my hair to "take care of" my pregnancy instead of letting me trap her son. What? I’m 24 years old. I’ve been with her son for 5 years. I love him and he loves me. How do I tell this crazed woman off without making her loathe me even more? I need to tell her that I’m an adult and I insist on her treating me that way. I’d also like to tell her to cut the cord already. Her son now has a family of his own, she can’t be breathing down his back forever. Right?
Um.. I’m sorry but it’s 2009. Not 1950. Having a child out of wedlock isn’t really socially unacceptable anymore. I mean sure, for some religious views it is, and that’s fine. I promise you I wont burn in Hell though because I had a child with someone I love. I did not just "spread my legs". That being said, my boyfriend’s father just got up and left one day, and got remarried without telling ANYONE. Including his children. So I feel that his mom has some abandonment issues and that’s why she’s holding onto her kids for dear life. I dont want to yell at her and make her feel bad, I just want her to know I dont appreciate the way she treats me. My boyfriend is only just realizing that she’s irrational and he’s about to burst himself. If she starts to say bad things about me to my face I have no right to tell her to back off?
I was and still am in love with this girl, she is my best friend. I went four straight months thinking of nothing but her, spending all my time with her and dedicating my whole life to her. She has a boyfriend though of 3 years so i could never make a move. I mean i was IN LOVE! Then over christmas break i hardly talked to her, also her boyfriend was home. But i started talking to this other girl ALL the time, i kinda had feelings for her but not love like my best friend. Well i finally thought that i was over my best friend in the way that it wasnt all i thought about anymore and that i didnt get jelous. But school has started back up i see her everyday and we are about to start spending a lot of time together again because of school activities. I cant fall for her again but i love her so much, What should i do????
I’m asking this one on behalf of someone else, but the book sounds fascinating. Any help would be appreciated!!
Many years ago (mid to late 80’s) I read a time travel romance and loved it. I think there were 2 novels. Unfortunately, I can’t recall the author or the title of either novel. I think the author’s first name is either Lisa or Jill but I’m not sure and I have no recollection on her last name. None what-so-ever. (There’s a good chance that the female character’s name was Lisa or Jill.)
If I remember correctly the story starts with a woman driving when bam! A gorgeous man appears in the passenger seat dressed in early to mid 18th century apparel. One thing leads to another she freaks out, they fall in love, marry and have a child when on Christmas he goes back to his own time right before the heroines eyes. The second novel she ends up going back with their son Kitt, becomes a maid, and tries to find out what happened to her husband in her spare time. Next thing you know her employer is hosting a party and low and behold her husband is a guest.
So this past year has been very rocky for my husband and I. I was at my husbands military christmas party and one of his lady co-workers seemed to be acting very strange. I felt funny about it. When we drove home I asked my husband about it. I also asked him how he felt about her. He casually said, "he was close to her, No really close to her". I about dropped my jaw at him saying that so openly. I talked to him about it and asked him what he meant and he said, "we’re just friends close friends from being in the same platoon together for so many years." I still didn’t feel very good about it, So I got snoopy. (No Im not proud of it) But glad I did. I found in his e-mail that he left open on accident that he was e-mailing her and asking to have lunch with her at drill weekends. He was e-mailing her regularly. The e-mail did just seem friendly – not sexual or anything, but he would say maybe we can have lunch this weekend. Then I found he was also signed up for a Adult web site. Which REALLY HURT. I have always loved my husband and been faithful to him so this was a blow to me. Because I had already forgave him for cheating on me when we lived over seas in Italy. He went to school (in the military) and on his off time he would go to a bar and drink with another Navy guy and was sitting with two ladies which over the five weeks turned into dancing and kissing. I was so hurt the first time because I was pregnant at the time and far from all my family. Took a long time to get over but he promised it would NEVER EVER happen again. So to get back to the recent…..I am having a hard time dealing with all of this again. He swearer’s he did nothing with the lady from the military other than a dinner and talking at lunch and swearer’s most of the time other people from the platoon was there.
But then I found out he was flirting with ladies on Myspace, man things just kept getting worse. I was going crazy. I even found a saved phone number from an old girlfriend. He said they messaged each other on classmates and then later looked her number up and saved it in his work phone, but that he never used it. How do I trust him. He has given all his codes to me and swearer’s I am his only one. But I know Cheaters will lie till they go to their GRAVE. So I am always on my toes. We have been to counseling a few times, it did help, But I am still having a hard time…..He promised me the first time he cheated he would never be with a lady alone again, but then he went to dinner with her and lied to me about it, He says, He lied to me because he knew i’d be mad and there was nothing to the dinner, but friendship.
He gets very mad at me when I bring up his past, or when i tell him I don’t trust him. He just doesn’t get what he has destroyed. We are very very close as a couple, (I know that sounds weird) But we are always holding hands, kissing and everyone tells us how cute we are as a couple and wish they could find a relationship like that. Yes our sex life is GREAT also. At least everyday and usually more than that. Yes we have four kids. Yes we have to be creative. We have been married 19 1/2 years now. But I just don’t know what to think. Does he really love me, Why do men flirt with women "IF THEY LOVE THERE WIFE’S SO MUCH" I JUST DON’T KNOW IF I CAN EVER TRUST HIM AGAIN. I LOVE HIM WITH ALL MY HEART. But I feel like things will never be the same again. We have a week or two that goes great and then all my frustrations come back from a flash back. How does one EVER REALLY know if someone is Truly sorry????????? I wish I could really know if he love’s me. I cry often, but he doesn’t know it. I cry because I miss (the KNOWING my husband LOVED ME) It’s a feeling I wish I could get back.
I haven’t told anyone about all this (except the counselor) and I have to always acted like my marriage is great to our family etc. I don’t want everyone to know what he has done. One its embarrassing for me and I don’t want anyone to think badly of him. I know that’s sounds stupid. But You gotta understand I LOVE HIM and I don’t want him hurt in anyway. We have enough pain between us dealing with it than to involve others. Also another reason is our son went though Cancer for a year and We’ve had enough pain, so involving others just would add to it. This is way I am sharing it here. I need to get it out. I know he doesn’t want to loose "US" when I mentioned leaving him he feel apart crying begging me not to leave. He is constantly tell me that he love’s me and never has Cheated since Italy with the Kiss. He tells me he didn’t realize the things he was doing recently was going to hurt me or that I would call it cheating. But I am so confused & not sure if I can trust him. Guys what are some signs that a guy is really sorry. HELP!!!!!!!
I want to get my ex back!
Ok we dated for two months & a month of it was long distance because he goes to college like an hour away & we completely trusted eachother! We never fought, ever!
The other month of our relationship he was home for Christmas break and let’s just say he took my v card but he wasn’t a virgin..and on new years eve he wanted to go to a party where he went to college & asked me to go but i said no i wanted to stay home with my family & friends..so he comes back the next day and says we need to talk and says he seen his ex at the party and it brought back feelings and it wasnt fair to me and i was completely broken.
They broke up because they fought nonstop and never really were happy I guess you could say but they were eachothers first so he says he loves her.
A month after he breaks up with me there dating and its been like a week into it now and they are already fighting and i was talking to him tonight and he told me why they were fighting basically because he doesnt trust her and its long distance for them too and he told me that he knows he screwed me over but he loves her with his whole heart and no matter how much shit she puts him through he will always be stuck with her even if he does deserve better..
…and he told me i know you wouldnt do something like that but im with her and its not going to change..will he ever realize that he does deserve better and that he can actually trust me and want to be with me again???
They dated over 2 years ago and she just got out of a 2 year relationship is she just using him for a rebound??
Me and my ex husband have been divorce since june 09. We got joint custody. I was never at the divorce hearing because i was never notify of the court date so what he put down he got. My ex has a new child before we was divorce. Even though we live in different states and he is in the army a phone isn’t that hard to do.He never calls to check up on my son he calls like once a month he gives me child support because he has he said he wouldn’t give it to me but since he has to he does. Now I want to take him back to court because I was sole custody of my 2 year old son. My son has been in my custody since day 1. My ex never sent him a birthday card no christmas gifts his mom gets my son gifts and puts my exs name on it. He makes it seem like he is father of the year. everyone knows he has a daughter but they dont know he has a son. So I want to go back to court to get full custody more child support and to make him pay for daycare since I cant get a job in the daytime since both my parents work and dont get home til like 5 or 6. He refuses to pay for daycare or even help me. I start school next month and have to go at night because I have no one to watch my son in days and that’s why its impossible for me to get a job because no one wants to hire me because of my hours of 6-close most jobs night hours are 5-11.
Im not trying to be some bitter women but you just have to put yourself in my shoes. I just think my son deserves better and I dont want to share my son with someone who doesn’t care about him just because he didn’t want a boy but now has a daughter doesn’t mean anything. Any advice how I can get this court case started??? By the way Im 21 I live in VA and my ex i dont know where he stays he lies about his locations with me
(We started going out on April 15th, 2007)
Matt & I went out for 1 year 4 months & 14 days and we were perfect together. We loved each other more than anyone else could possibly imagine. Everyone said we were just so perfect and we were such a cute and perfect couple. For my Christmas and 1 year anniversary present Matt got me a promise ring, and promised to be with me forever. He had everything planned out and he even had when he was going to propose/be engaged to me planned. I was going to invite him to go to prom with me this year (2008-2009), but now that we’re not together I don’t know if that’ll still happen. Everything was perfect & I was so excited because I wouldn’t have to go through the pain of a heartbreak and finding someone to to spend the rest of my life with since I was with Matt. Matt was my first boyfriend, my first love, my first kiss, my first makeout, the first guy I really hungout with, the first guy I actually believed was different, the first guy I held hands with, he was just my first for everything.
Well as we all know that didn’t happen…everything changed. Matt & I broke up and yes my heart did get broken, and it still is. But…We’re still going to stay friends and still talk as friends, just not about the break up. I honestly wanted to try to make it work, I didn’t want to give up and I was hoping he wouldn’t give up either, but he did. Matt told me not to blame myself for the break up that it was all him, but I just don’t see how I couldn’t have any part in that…So I started thinking…if I would have just said yes to one thing I told him no to, maybe it would’ve worked out, maybe we would still be together. Such as dancing…I hated dancing, and I figured out why…because I never had a real boyfriend to dance with and I’d never danced before…but since I started going out with Matt he got me to start dancing, and I like it now, but it was only because it was with him, and I was in his arms. I just really wish that I could go back to every single thing I said no to, and change it to a yes. Since Matt was my first for/with so many things it’s harder for me to let go of him. I wasn’t Matt’s first for a lot of these things so it’s not as hard for him as it is me. We’ve cleared everything up about the break up and now it’s just a matter of time before the heartbreak will get over. I’m glad Matt is actually happy now and all I want is just for him to be happy!! Even though we’re not going out I am glad we’re staying friends, because I don’t want to loose him completely!! Yes talking to him is hard now because I can’t call him on the phone and talk to him like I use to. I also…can’t call him "sweetheart" anymore, I can’t say "I love you" anymore, I can’t say "I miss you", I can’t kiss his soft lips, I can’t just stay in his arms during a hug anymore, I can’t hangout with him like I use to, I can’t hold his hands anymore, I can’t call/txt him to say good morning or good night anymore, and nothing is going to be the same. So it’s going to be hard.
I’ve prayed to god every single night asking for just one more chance with Matt, and to have god just put it in his head, or dream of what use to be. But as of now, my prayers haven’t been granted…sadly to say. I don’t know what to do anymore. I don’t want to be hurt like I am, but I don’t want to forget/get over Matt either. I know deep down inside he still loves me because he’s told me so, but I don’t know anymore.
There’s just something about him that made me be myself. He brought me out of my shell, and I was so happy of the person I became, but now that I’m not with him anymore I can tell that I’m slowly drifting back to my old self. I was even going to ask him to prom, and everyone knows I hate to dance, but Matt made me like dancing, being with him and sharing that special moment with him. I just don’t know what it is about him, but I loved him and I loved who he made me become!!!!
(We’ve been broken up since August 29th, 2008)
On Tuesday, September 9th, 2008 i sent him a picture message, and his had a pic of me and the song what hurts the most attached to it. and then it said stuff like please don’t forget about me even if it is just as a friend and that kind of stuff. and he sent one back saying…
"Theres my pretty girl. Ill never forget u Krystal dont worry"
I get to see him next weekend at a small festive that our town does, and he said that I can still go up and give him a hug and talk to him like we have done since we were 8 years old (before we started going out) But he wanted to know what booth I was working and what times. So I told him and then asked him if he was wanting to know so he could stay as far away as possible, and his response was…"Na juss wonderin"
I’m sooo confused I don’t know what he’s going to do this next weekend, and when he broke up with me it took him like 10 minutes to say that he wanted to break up, and his eyes were all puffy and he was shaking. Also after he
Before he even could say that he wanted to break up, all he could keep saying is "YOU KNOW I LOVE YOU AND ALWAYS WILL LOVE YOU" and since that is all he could keep saying to me, it took him like 10 minutes to say he wanted to break up. Also after he broke up with me he started crying, and when I talked to him that night on the phone he said he cried the 20 minute drive to town and then 2-3 hours in his uncles arms. And when I talked to him on the phone 4 days after the break up he kept calling me his girl and saying I still love you, and I always will no matter what!!!!
Me and my ex have been broken up since the 23rd of January.He hasnt spoke to me,called or contacted me.Its as if he has forgotten me completely.I had made a mistake begging for him back,and making myself feel less than i am.That only made me feel worse.You cant force someone to love you.Two days after the breakup i asked him if he still loved me,he said no he didnt,which really hurt,because how can u possibly forget someone soo quickly.I mean we spent 9 full months together doing everything.He was my best friend.He was my first true love,which i heard takes alot of time to get over.I had made some mistakes of my own.I have disrespected him several times,made him feel as if he had to choose between me and his family,distracted him from God.this all happened when i was selfish and too confident in the middle of the relationship.My sister had told me If he really loved you he would have pushed and never gave up on the relationship no matter what.She is now married to a man that she says puts up with everything she says and does,because he loves her.His reasons to why he broke up with me were You never changed,we werent going anywhere,and i feel that God wants me to be single,and focus on him.I respect that,but i mean seriously i do not deserve this hurt,and do not believe it.His ex-girlfriend before me he had visited her in Ohio before we were dating last last christmas.It was a long distance relationship,he had payed 200 dollars plus the christmas gifts.when he arrived she had broke up with him,and had flirted and talked to one of his best friends.He had missed her from what he told me,but that is absolutely ridicolous.5 months into that relationship by phone and email and he still spoke to her,and 9 months with me and no contact whatsoever.im confused.I mean yeah i gave him emotional hurt i didnt see,but i still holded on to him and kept going strong.i had lost my dog and i begged him when he could to pay half of my new one and i would pay half.All i could do was apologize and make him see that i did not want his money or materials soo i returned them back to him.all i wanted was his support and love.from s guys perspective,do u know if he will come back,and is hiding his feelings right now?or should i just move on and let it go?why do you think he discontinued talking to me?Is he thinking bad things about me that he didnt see and telling everyone?It hurts to feel like you are the bad person.
My ex fiance and i have been split up 3 months. we only broke up because we were growing apart with me going back to school and him starting a new job. Things kind of became dull and he said he was unhappy. Since the broke up we have talked some but not in the last 2 weeks. I know he is thinking about me because we both have blackberries and on his blackberry messenger since christmas he has been putting up status’ that relate to us. One said "wants to hear her say papi" which is what i called him. another state "can’t stop thinking about you" which he has told me when we have talked that he tries but can’t stop. This morning it said "good morning beautiful how was your night" and last night it said "going out but only having one beer because i don’t want to upset you" because the biggest fights we have had since we broke up was over him drinking alot. Knowing him and us being together for 3 years he’s never been one to post things like that even when we were happy together so anyways his last status last night said "talk to me" i’m 99% sure these post are directed at me but to afraid to say something and look stupid. I do want him back and i’m wondering how i can get him to talk to me first or actually show me if he wants me back because he is the one that left. Thanks
So his status last night said let’s make it official cause I want you girl. I wasn’t sure if that was meant to me or not so I waited until this morning and changed mine to show me. Now he just changed his status to waiting on tonight. Not sure if that’s referencing my statement or not. What do you think and what can I put on mine if it is to let him know I’m interested without going overboard?
My husband suddenly left me a few weeks ago and I was stunned. We had just had our wedding 6 months ago, and just a few weeks before he left, his side of the family had thrown us another reception so they could all meet me. I came here with him (600 miles away from my family and friends) to support his military career. It took me so long to find a job and when I finally found one, it was mega stressful. I was considering looking or another job when he dropped the bomb on me. Now I HAVE to stay there, so both my work and home life are hell. He went from being affectionate to extremely mean and verbally abusive, he took me out to dinner and kissed me goodnight, and then in the morning he told me he wanted a divorce. He is always trying to start fights with me, was harassing me at work and calling me to harass me about "just sign the papers!" which there aren’t any papers drawn up yet, and I am trying to get his command to get him a psych eval. He has left the apt (but comes back weekly for more clothes) and refuses to talk to me, only communicating by text. A psychologist told me to try not to take it personally because he is sick, but it’s hard when he’s being ruthless and doing all he can to destroy your heart and get rid of you. I haven’t done anythingto deserve this and I am so hurt and bewildered I don’t know what to do.
I can’t go home for Christmas because of my stupid job, so I will spend Christmas alone. I was so happy just a short while ago, and I pray and pray to God to help me, but I fell like all I do is suffer. I don’t know why this had to happen- I had to be far away from home in a strange city knowing virtually no one (I’m a little shy), In a job I hate, Imeet and grow to love his family and friends etc., and they love me in return. He was bugging me for months and months to change my name over to his last name and now that I have finally changed everything over, he wants rid of me, and says he never even loved me to begin with!
I am just at a loss as to what to do. I have no real friends and family and feel extremely alone. I did nothing to deserve this except love and trust him and I got so hurt. I don’t know why God would let this happen, I was a good and faithful military wife, I gave him his space, I was honest and fair, I could have cleaned him out and screwed everything up for him after he left, but I didn’t. I know everybody is going to say give up and move on, and I am trying my hardest, but this feels like a death has occured and I a grieving very hard.. All our future plans together, I had started fertility treatments because we wanted to start a family. etc., are dead. On top of it I have been really sick lately, lost about 30 lbs, under a lot of stress at work. I feel like I’m in a living hell. What is this happening to me? Why? And what can I do to not be sad and sick all the time? I do not know what to do with my life now, where to go, what to do. I talk to people (who by the way say He left you!? Why you’re so pretty!" guess "pretty" has nothing to do with it), go to a therapist and I’m on medication, but this thing is still so painful I can barely get through each day. Should I be praying more? What am I doing wrong? And starting ove with someone new? I can’t even imagine it because what if I fall in love again and get discarded the same way again. How do I know the man isn’t lying to me? How do I know and relax that he won’t abandon me like the others? I can’t go thru this anymore.
I don’t feel like I can move back home, it would seem like the ultimate failure to me, and i don’t want everyone to know until I am ready to tell them, so going home for me is not really a good option at this point.
Okay So I need some help. This is gonna be kinda long. So anyway I am 14 so is Robert. I know you may think that is a little young, but for me it isnt. So please dont say I am way to young.
So I was dating this guy named Robert for 3 months, then over christmas break this one guy Dylan started talking to me. He would always call me pretty and stuff and tell me how he wanted to go out with me. So I was preswayed by him and the day I got back to school I dumped Robert. Biggest mistake of mylife. Anyway I knew right after I dumped him that I shouldnt have.
so then a week later Dylan asked me out. I relized that I never really liked Dylan. That I only liked having a guy call me pretty and stuff. so then after a month he broke up with me.
I knew then that I should talk to Robert about how I felt aabout him. I talked to him and he told me he still liked me. So we almost got back together, but the he decied that he didnt want anymore drama.
So he knows that I like him, and people have told me that he likes me, but they have also told me that he doesnt like me.
So today I went into the gym(where everyone hangs out after school to talk to him) and well like he was flirting with a bunch of other girls, but like he kept looking at me.
I have a class with him, and I awlays catch him starring at me.
My friend Lulu told me that he always looks at me differently then everyone else. Like he loves me.
I think I do love him!!!!!!
So here are my questions-
1- Does he like me?
2-why does he stare at me? What does it mean?
3-Do you think I will get back together with him?
4-Should I forget about him?
Please write any comments you have about this!!!
-Thanks (:
In November of 2008, I met the best thing that ever happened to me. We met online and fell for each other quickly. We had a great relationship with a few bumps in the road. I was more than your average boyfriend. I cooked her dinner and sometimes we would cook together, bought her dinner, bought her roses on occasion just to say I loved her, helped her financially if needed, and did all of the little things that mattered. She has had a troubled past when it comes to guys. Because of that issue she was very insecure. I always plead and swore that I wasn’t going to leave or cheat on her. About 5 months into our relationship she met a new guy from her work. She had a lot of guy friends that I didn’t mind her seeing at all, but this guy was different. After a week of knowing her he offered to pay hundreds of dollars worth of car maintenance for her car. He offered to pay for a new tattoo, took her our for breakfast all of the time. I knew what he was trying to do, and I demanded that it stop. We argued for a long time over what was going on and I was given the jealous and insecure label. She ended up cheating on me nad leaving me for him around our six month mark. I was devastated. She told me she wanted me in her life still, but I denied the offer. She would still send me text messages but I would ignore them because I was bitter. I gave her a diamond necklace for Christmas, and a watch for valentines day that she ended up giving back to me when she left. I also returned the promise ring that I was going to present to her on our six month anniversary. I wanted to prove to her that I would stay honest, commited, and true to her until we were ready to be engaged in the future. Her relationship with the new guy didn’t last long at all. They only "saw" each other for a few weeks. Months went by and we didn’t really speak to each other. About 3 months ago I decided I needed to get over her and move on. I deleted her off of my facebook to begin the process of healing. About a week ago I received a message from her on facebook asking why I deleted her off. I thought, "Why should I respond?" So I ignored her. She responded again and was upset that I didn’t respond. She told me that she still wanted me in her life and wanted to be friends. She told me that the guy she was dating at the time was cheating on her, and told me she was sorry for hurting me. She told me she understood if I didn’t want to talk to her. I responded back and told her how I felt about what she did, and told her I would think about being friends. She responded back and told me she worried about me a lot and thought it would be nice if we went out to lunch sometime. A few days went by and I accepted her offer for friendship. She was fine with it, and told me she only wanted to be friends because she had just broke up with her cheating boyfriend and wasn’t ready for a relationship. I told her I understood, and I wasn’t ready for one either. I decided to be a nice guy and I told her that if she needed someone to talk to for comfort I would. She sent me a text and thanked me for my thought, but there was nothing anyone could do. She had to get over it herself. She told me she wanted to have lunch and I told her that would be fine and to let me know when. She was okay with it, and wanted to start a conversation. I had to cut it short because I was going to bed, but I told her I would talk later.
Does my ex realize what she had lost, and slowly wants to come back to me? I do love her still, and I would give her a shot if she proves that she has changed. Ladies..what do you think..does she want me back? If she doesn’t, why would she want to talk to me again after her breakup? I thought I had women figured out, but I was dead wrong.
I just told me self-destructive finance of 2 years that "I will not take your drama into 2009" and ended the relationship right after christmas. I am slowly recovering like the average person, but I when I think about the behaviors I tolerated it makes me so angry that I feel like I’m having a stroke!!!
I often found myself crawled up in my bed with high anxiety because he was always on the path of self destruction and always failing things and calling me to poor out his failures on.
I saw him through Irag and the torment that came with knowing something could happened to him, as well as him calling and telling me of casualties, even crying sometimes. When he got home he saw everybody exept me for 2 months and rationalized it as him trying to stay away from me so that he does not kill/hurt me in anyway due to post-traumatic stress….
He relocated and moved in with another female soldier while I was away in grad school and never told me until I wanted to come down and visit after my semester was over. They both got on the phone and told me they were not together, although he confessed to sleeping with her. When I walked away from that situation, he along with his mother begged to give him another chance. I took him back when asked me to marry him, then called the wedding off 1 month before and said that he had financial problems, after I already paid for everything
He would call me all the time after that to say that he was broke and that he was planning on killing himself and that I was the only one he kept him going without suicidal thoughts.
He never knew how to spend the money he made. Most recently, I got a call at work from him saying: "this is it, I’m going to end it!!…the navy just found out that I had been lying on my application and now they are taking me to jail…go on with ya life" 2 weeks later, he called me and said that they decided to drop the charges and that he loves me sooo much.
I have been a strong woman, but this one has broken me down…how can I recover?
I was with this guy for 2 years. It was a very very serious relationship. Things started going wrong in the last couple months, we were both really stressed, everything sucked- then he cheated on me. I found out on Christmas 2007, we broke up New Years. He was too scared to even talk to me about it, wouldn’t answer my calls, it ended through a fuckin text.
I was a total mess, then pushed it back, tried to forget, and almost did.
Now, 4 months later, he’s trying VERY VERY hard to get back with me. He’s doing all these dumb boy things trying to prove to me that he does love me, and he even cried the other day because he supposedly gets things now and whatever.
I don’t trust him AT ALL.
I do love him too, but I think I should just forget about it.
I’m terrified to fall back into the same mess I was in before.
Since him, I put steel bars over my heart to prevent this sort of thing, and I’m pulling back.
What to do, what to do….
I already know what kind of answers I’m gonna get,
I know I should be figuring it out myself instead of asking strangers on Y!A,
But maybe I don’t trust myself to make the right decision.
=(
ok so i broke up with her on the 15th, broke her heart. i was upset too but i was going through ALOT of emotional stress, college, parents annoucement of a divorce, and other minor things like christmas and that had taken its toll on my mind along. i told her i would not be coming back and i was interested in other people. but i found myself missing her and i love her and it was utterly stupid to break up over that stuff.
now i went to her house the 31st told her this and she has been talking to a guy since the 25 or so. she told me she cares about me and if i had come back b4 that guy we would be dating again and the only reason she is talking to him is cuzz he treats her like i did- that came out of her mouth. we hugged and cried together and i wanted her back but she said she just cant do it, it was a taste of my own medicine, i asked if she loved me and she said yes. but she obviously likes this other guy. and said she didnt like her heart broken and she wouldnt break her friends heart. she said she didnt even expect them to last long and we would be bestfriends and see what happens
. i am so confused to say the least. please help me. i need advice! i want to just wait it out to show her i care and not really talk to her but i find myself wanting to txt her now, but i just dont know what to do…
she has txted me atleast once a day the past 4 days, she said goodnight on 2 of those days. also we dated for a year before we broke up and have done almost everything together as a couple and she is a real close friend with my sister. does this help my chances? what do i need to do to get her back in my life?
I will start by saying I never had an affair. What I have been into is gambling and yes lieing to her about it. So she caught me when I was talking to my sports book and told her I wasn’t since it was around Christmas she said she didn’t want to make any decisions before the holidays but she would let me know on January 19 which is when she started school again. So around December 7 we found out our daughter was being molested by a family member and our whole world was turned upside down, and we have been devastated everytime we think about this. So January 19 comes and goes On January 22 we are dealing with this mess and she flat out tells me that if this incident would not of happened she would of asked for a divorce. Now she don’t want to do anything till we have healed. I really am done with gambling of course the football season is over but hopefully by August I won’t want to gamble. Anyway I am hopeing we can put this back together as she claims (sometimes) she stills loves me but everytime she gets mad at me she tells me she wants to leave any tips will be helpful
I just told me self-destructive finance of 2 years that "I will not take your drama into 2009" and ended the relationship right after christmas. I am slowly recovering like the average person, but I when I think about the behaviors I tolerated it makes me so angry that I feel like I’m having a stroke!!!
I often found myself crawled up in my bed with high anxiety because he was always on the path of self destruction and always failing things and calling me to poor out his failures on.
I saw him through Irag and the torment that came with knowing something could happened to him, as well as him calling and telling me of casualties, even crying sometimes. When he got home he saw everybody exept me for 2 months and rationalized it as him trying to stay away from me so that he does not hurt me in anyway due to post-traumatic stress….
He relocated and moved in with another female soldier while I was away in grad school and never told me until I wanted to come down and visit after my semester was over. They both got on the phone and told me they were not together, although he confessed to sleeping with her and she was pregnant with a married man’s child. When I walked away from that situation, he along with his mother begged to give him another chance. I took him back when asked me to marry him, then called the wedding off 1 month before and said that he had financial problems, after I already paid for everything
He would call me all the time after that to say that he was broke and that he was planning on killing himself and that I was the only one he kept him going without suicidal thoughts.
He never knew how to spend the money he made. Most recently, I got a call at work from him saying: "this is it, I’m going to end it!!…the navy just found out that I had been lying on my application and now they are taking me to jail…go on with ya life" 2 weeks later, he called me and said that they decided to drop the charges and that he loves me sooo much.
I have been a strong woman, but this one has broken me down…how can I recover?
ok so i broke up with her on the 15th, broke her heart. i was upset too but i was going through ALOT of emotional stress, college, parents annoucement of a divorce, and other minor things like christmas and that had taken its toll on my mind along with her mother that is single and both of us agree she is a *****. i told her i would not be coming back and i was interested in other people. but i found myself missing her and i love her and it was utterly stupid to break up over that stuff. now i went to her house the 31st told her this and she has been talking to a guy since the 25 or so. she told me she cares about me and if i had come back b4 that guy we would be dating again and the only reason she is talking to him is cuzz he treats her like i did- that came out of her mouth. we hugged and cried together and i wanted her back but she said she just cant do it, it was a taste of my own medicine, i asked if she loved me and she said yes. but she obviously likes this other guy. and said she didnt like her heart broken and she wouldnt break her friends heart. she waid she didnt even espect them to last long and we would be bestfriends and see what happens. i am so confused to say the least. please help me. i need advice! i want to just wait it out to show her i care and not really talk to her but i find myself wanting to txt her now, but i just dont know what to do… she has txted me atleast once a day the past 4 days, she said goodnight on 2 of those days. also we dated for a year before we broke up and have done almost everything together as a couple and she is a real close friend with my sister. does this help my chances? what do i need to do to get her back in my life?
How did he know every time I wondered lifting the porcelain doll in the air. I held it close, admiring every inch of it, even how the light reflected off the tiny glass eyes almost making it seem alive. I smiled and set the doll down next to me on top of the layer of shredded wrapping paper that covered the floor. I love Christmas. I love the smell. I love the anticipation. I love taking those beautifully wrapped presents and shredding them apart wildly to see whatever treasure lie inside. Oh, and I really like candy canes. But what I really loved most was the safe feeling I got when my mom and dad wrap me up and read to me in front of the fire and don’t even complain if I eat more than one cookie.
* * *
Mommy and Daddy don’t lie. I asked them one time. I asked specifically at dinner. I remember because it was over spaghetti with tomato sauce which is my favorite meal. After taking a really long time to chew Mommy looked me right in the eyes and said We might not tell you things the things you’re not ready to hear, but we promise we won’t lie to you. I didn’t understand that first part. What could I not be ready for? I know mostly everything already. I know most of the abc’s and I know which ones are vowels. I know that the difference between red and read is that one is a color and I’m only in kindergarten. But I guess that there are some things that I don’t know too. I don’t know why daddy leaves sometimes and why it makes mommy cry and grandma come over with wine and popcorn and old movies to make her feel better. I asked mommy why she was crying one time and she said it wasn’t daddys fault. I asked again. She shooed me away. I guess I’m not ready yet. There are some other things too. Like how come that one time last year on Christmas Eve when I took my sleeping bag downstairs and hid underneath the dining room table I never saw Santa come down the chimney even though I kept my eyes open until I saw the sun peeking through the clouds even though the moon was still out. I remember falling asleep under that table and trying to ignore the burning of tears that was stinging my throat and eyes. But when I woke up there were so many presents. And I remember being so happy that I started to cry again, but this time happy. And I remember brushing tears away with my hand and then noticing the smudge on my hand where the tears had mixed with the ink that said You can’t catch magic. Love, Santa.
Well its for school and Ive got to make it a mystery so I was gonna have her try and find out who santa really was.
I have just recently become single, because my husband of 9 years walked out on me and our four kids. He did this a week before Christmas. Although he just left we have had no kind of relationship at all for about a year now. With the exception that he still lived with us. For a whole year now I have been going crazy being without a lover. I have stayed faithfull even though it was very hard. Now just recently I have met this guy that takes my breath away. He treats me like I have never been treated before, and I really fill he is sincere. I am torn because I want this so bad but worry it’s too soon. My kids really like him, and he is good for them because their real dad doesn’t have much to do with them. My sister says go for it that I deserve to be happy. What would you do if this was happening to you??
My ex and I were together for 1 yr and a half, and we really loved each other.. we were each other’s first real relationships, first loves, and many other firsts (except we didn’t go ALL the way but we did everything else). We were planning to get married and have kids after university.. i swear we were the loves of each other’s lives. But we used to fight alot- and i did some crap by kissing one of my ex’s while we were on a break. And then he started treating me like crap and taking me for granted and going out with other girls.
The thing is, though, we still talked EVERY night, and told each other we loved each other and still had a "sexual relationship" and we really close but his feelings for me changed. And he left me a few months ago and i think he went to be with his ex. Plus, i’m going away to university next year so he thought we wouldnt have time to work out everything.
I know he really likes this girl and i kinda moved on too, but i mean could it really be over? &He only sent me a stupid text for christmas! How can he be over us already after everything we went through together?
even though i can move on and have feelings for other people right now, he just still is special to me and I still think about him very often.
My ex is coming over for christmas and I do want to get her back very bad we still talk but today should i treat her like a friend? like a girlfriend? or should I just be a friend a little flirty? how should I treat her and what should I do to get her back?
I have been married to a good but cold and sometimes selfish man for 12 years. I worked my but off for the first 6 years and got not much in return. Recently I told him I was done and wanted to leave. Now he has turned over a new leaf and is trying to fix everything and doing the things now that he would not do in the past. 90% of me says to little to late. We have kids 6 and 2. But the other 10% says stay maybe the feelings will come back in time because he is now trying to change the things that made me not love him anymore. I am feeling torn because I don’t want to lead him on by staying and trying to love him again and have it not work. But I also don’t want to walk away without knowing for sure because of my kids.
To James, it is not as shallow as christmas presents. This is more like love and affection. I would go out of my way to show him affection. I would tell him I loved him. He would not return that. He never wanted to have sex. He would put me down when I expressed my opinions. He would not fix up our house instead he would spend all of his time and our money (I work full time as well) on his hobbies. I guess if wanting a loving, caring partnership was selfish than maybe I was.
Last year, I requested that the state review my ex’s income to see if my son was eligible for an increase in child support. I had not asked for a review in 9 years. He had a huge increase in income in those 9 yrs. so the state increased his child support. He was furious and since then, has been doing whatever possible to get back at me. He only sees my son about every 3-5 months, and on both visitations he has exercised since then, he has refused to bring my son back home, refused to meet me halfway, refused to allow me to pick him up early, and even refused to take him to the airport (15-20 mintutes away from his house). This meant that I had to drive over 6 hours to pick my son up at 6:00 pm, and he didn’t get back home until 1:00 am both times, and had to get up at 6:00 am to go to school. My ex isn’t concerned with doing this to my son at all. It is all about getting back at me. I spoke to a lawyer, who suggested that I write my ex a certified letter, before taking it to court.
This lawyer actually said that if he were me, he would refuse to allow my ex to pick my son up, unless he agreed to do what was right for my son and either bring him home at a decent hour, or agree to meet me halfway. He wants me to at least try to write a letter first, informing him of exactly what he is doing to our son, and then if my ex refuses to listen to reason, then I could take it to court.
What should I say in this letter, to make it to the point, and not about what I want or what my ex wants, but more about what is in my sons best interest?
Just to point out: My ex has visitation rights every other weekend, every spring break, every summer, every other thanksgiving, and a week at christmas. HE chooses not to exercise those. I have tried to encourage him to exercise more visitations. He makes excuses why he can’t. I have suggested that he call my son more often than 3-4 times a year. He still won’t. I have asked him to stop leaving our son with family members for most of his visitations that he does exercise. He gives me nothing but excuses. I am not the cause of my ex not seeing my son more often. He does that all on his own.
The reason I am trying to resolve this, is because I have had to watch my son, who by the way is 11, cry when I have gotten him up for school, when he has only gotten 5 hours of sleep. That is what is not fair. His "revenge" against me over the child support, is hurting my son. I am more than willing to meet him halfway, but he is refusing out of nothing more than spite. My son has complained numerous times about how my ex treats him, but there isn’t anything that I would be able to call CPS about.
