Bit stupid asking on YA! But should I get back with my ex?

Me and my ex were together 4 years, we have a 11 month old son.
We had our life planned out.. We were engaged and had a nice little flat. We’d been together so long that we kind of became the same person? We were really connected. :/
About 8 weeks after having our child, I started to think I didn’t love him, well that I wasn’t IN love with him… I stayed in the relationship not wanting to hurt him or our son.

In February I asked for a break, and the following week explained everything and called it off completely.

Only A COUPLE OF DAYS after we split.. A friend asked me out for a drink.. I accepted.. And we somehow sort of ‘got together’. I’m still with him now. We’re really in tune and on the same level..
We’re living together.. NOT because that’s where the relationship was.. But because I let my ex have the flat. It was me leaving him, it wasn’t his fault so I signed it over, and would be potentially homeless.

My current partner does not cook (Well he’s cooked 3 times since last month! Woo…. -_-) He does not clean.. He wastes his life away on his Xbox getting stoned. (Not smoking it in the house.. I have a baby :/) We argue quite a bit now too.. Mainly over him smoking weed.. Really trivial things like.. He hasn’t got enough.. Or He won’t do ANYTHING when stoned.. I dunno :/ I know he loves me though.. I feel bad.

I just find myself wanting my ex back more. We’ve both said we still love each other. He’s the father of my child ffs. :/ We know each other inside out.. But I’ve torn my family apart! And hurt him.. And he doesn’t know if he can trust me.

I do have some feelings for my new boyfriend :/ I would not be completely unhappy if we were to continue with this relationship.

Right now.. I can’t even comprehend WHY I thought I didn’t love my ex. When I compare feelings… With my new boyfriend they’re like.. Exciting? And that’s it I guess :/ With my ex.. They’re so much deeper.. And exciting too.. But for different reasons.. Excited about our family, and being together.. I dunno. :/

I’m just so confused. I haven’t mentioned any of this to my current.. I have told my ex. :/ My mum says me and my son can stay there until I’ve got the money for a deposit on a house, but I don’t know if I can do it??

I have a good time with my current partner :/ And it would be sad to end it now. I know that we couldn’t be friends if we split. That bothers me. :/

I am fully prepared to stay with my mum.. Get my own place.. And wait until my ex is ready :/ If he ever is… I’d wait years to get my family back.

I’m just so confused. I’ve spoken to my friend about it .. She says "It’s completely YOUR choice" Which it is. But I can’t decide. I can’t just keep plodding along like this, it feels unfair to my ex and to my boyfriend. :/ I feel awful.

How can I decide?
What are your opinions?

I’ve ended up in a ridiculous situation :/
I don’t understand what happened to my feelings with my ex at the time.. I now do not understand how I thought I did not love him. :/ So soon after having our son too.. That should have been the happiest time of our lives. :/


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Should I get back with my ex-girlfriend?? Please help?

Ok so I had a girlfriend last year in the middle of June 2008. We met through a site and I was 16 at the time and she was 15. She lived (and still does) about 50 mins away from me. We of course, flirted and eventually met. We met at a movie theater near where I live and made out. It was my first kiss and it was the best night of my life.

She’s a very good girl: smart, funny, attractive, etc. and she trusts me with a lot as she told me about issues she’s going through with her family and friends and so on. I was the best boyfriend I could be and always made sure my baby was ok. I listened to her and comforted her and everything like that.

So we were going out for about a month until she told me that she had to go to a different state because her parents enrolled her into some educational thing for business. Before she left, she promised me that she would msg me through the site we met on in order to keep in touch. She arrived to her destination and we still messaged each other and texted. But, as time went on, I didnt hear back from her for a while. I would leave her a comment on her page on the site showing my love for her and I guess she would delete it as to not let it show to page visiters. BUT, her friends’ comments were still there. I thought something was up and even when we instant messaged, she would be very short word responsed and she just seemed a little different.

So a couple of days later I started to IM her. I left her a couple of IMs hinting that something felt wrong to me. I got no response but she was online though. So, I felt maybe she was ignoring me, so I said some short last IM that signaled that I was going to sign off. But right before I could she responded and asked me what was going on.

I told her what I felt and that we only met once and it’s tough to see her because of the distance. So I broke up with her that night and we agreed to just be friends.

Now, that was all in the month of June. A couple of months later, sometime during September of October, she started to talk to me again through the site. We caught up to see how each other’s lives had been during the silent months and she told me she had a bf. I was single at the time, but she said that she really wants to leave him and be with me instead because she had never met a caring and selfless guy like myself before. She told me that she’s with him because his parents told her that he is suicidal and that she could make him happy. I know right? Isnt that kind of weird?

So, she was already his friend and so they started going out.
So her and I were IM’ing and she was talking about this whole thing. Then it hit me, she randomly blurted out the topic of sex. I was really caught offguard.

She asked me all of these questions and everything through IM and she told me she wants to have sex with me. I of course agreed. Why not? The average 16 year old would have. Plus she’s gorgeous. So, we started talking about it and about the next time we would see each other. BUT everything changed.

All of a sudden when we were IM’ing she said "wait, dont say anything, my bf is here. dont type or anything."
Me- "ok. whats going on? why is he there?"
Her- "We’re gonna get busy. I’ll ttyl"

I was lik WTF!?!? I questioned her why and she told me that I got her horny and it was why he was there. I was humiliated. She signed off and came back in about 15 mins.
She even described exactly how it happened even when I told her not to!

I didnt know what got into her! She never seemed that way at all! I was in shock and I though about it for the rest of the day. it was a mess.

So, I still talked to her and she told me that her bf broke up with her the next day because she referred to him by using my name instead of his because I was on her mind. I don’t really believe it, but yeah

So now its April 2009. Things have changed and she just left another guy because he didnt know how to treat her like a bf would. So she’s single. Ive been single this whole time lol

So we are talking again and we want to meet each other again. She’s apologized for what happened earlier countless times and I really believe she’s sorry for what she did. We havent declared that we will try to go out or anything, but should we?
I know that she’s done a lot that hurt me, but I feel healed and it happened in the past. It doesn’t really bother me anymore, because if I was "in the mood’ like she was, I probably would have done the same exact thing. Was it wrong for her to have sex with that guy? He was technically her bf at the time after all, and I wasn’t her bf at the time so it isn’t her fault is it?

Out of all the girls I’ve talked to she’s been the most caring and charismatic out of all of them. I really want to see her again, and we will very soon, but do you think we should give it another shot?



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First off i Would like to say this is the first time I am posting on this forum site, so i hope that i get this right.
To get started I was injured at my job on Mon. feb 22, 2010. I was lifting a 70 lb. peice of metal and as I was picking it up I sneezed.(I know sneezed but it happened) It hurt like all hell laid on the ground for about half an our let my boss know, who by the way did NOT file an injury report, and woke up the next morning not able to roll out of bed. Then when I was finally able to reach for my phone,3 hours later, called the shop supervise, who is above my boss, and told him what happened asked if i should make a doctors appointment for go to a chiropractor that day so I could get a note. He told me to go the the chiropractor, so I did and it cost me because they did not take insurance…. First mistake I guess… So, she told me that I tweaked my back and to take the rest of the week off. In the mean time I was talking with my parents and they told me to make an appointment with my doctor so I did for the following Tues. and used up all of my holiday pay for those couple of days. Then my doctor tells me that I have severe back spasms and a possible ruptured disc he per scribed me a tone of pills, 4 every 6 hours, but he also told me that I need to talk to the owner and tell him since I was injured at work I have 45 days to file a claim. I talked to the owner the next day on wed. and he told me to go to their doctor on thurs. That doctor told me the exact same thing that my doctor said and they told me to take a bunch more pills, another 4 every 6 hours. So, at one point I was taking upwards of 16 pills a day. So they told me to come back next thurs and I did, they gave me an ex ray and said you still have the severe back spasms and my need an MRI later. Then, my Workman’s comp insurance handler calls me takes my information and tells me that I can not go to their doctor anymore I have to go to another doctor that’s an hour away, verses 10 minutes and by the way they were both the exact same company centegra… ugh… I received a check from the insurance company from the 2/23/10-3/8/10. I continued to see their doctors and they keep telling me that I need physical therapy. Neither my nor the doctors have been able to get a hold of my case manager who never meet her commitment that she said on her voice mail, which was to contact me back by 3:30 the same day i left the messages. In the mean time I moved my motorcycle five feet so i could get my garbage cans out the door and it killed my back. I told my doctor this and she wrote it down and told me not to do it again. So we Finlay hear from Workmans comp that I could start physical therapy on, get this 4/10/2010. Over a month later. So, I have been doing that from now until last week when my Therapist told me that Workman’s comp denied my claim. I called them up and the case manager said that she dined it because if I was well enough to move my bike I was well enough to go back to work. both the therapists and THEIR doctor said that was bs. oh did i mention that I haven’t gotten any money since that first check!!!! I have just recently contacted a lawyer and he is working to get me what they owe me and so i can go back to therapy.
So, in all im broke behind on my rent, car, car insurance, bike insurance, phone bill, utility bills, credit cards, and over drawn on my savings account. I have no idea what my next step is and can I hit these guys so hard that they wont think about discontinuing someones claim before contacting anyone!!!!!!!
Forgot to mention a couple of things I had to drop my dental, short term disability and life insurance because I can not afford the every 2 weeks and can not get them through my work again until next Jan.



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Things have been kinda rocky because of things I did on my end. My boyfriend got sick of it so he decided to break up with me. The very same day he broke up with me several hours later he then told my mother it was not over he just wanted me to change. So about a week later he finally started calling me again which was last weekend. Therefore I had blew it all over again with me being jealous and saying things over text messages to upset him. Once again I pushed him away he didnt talk to me for a week then I am back to the same old person again. Now I am worried that I might of blew my chances. Yes I am going into therapy but now Im worried I lost him forever. Please any help on getting him back? I tryed sending emails throughout the week saying I am sorry. But he hears sorry from me so much. I even text messaged to see if he was doing ok. All I got was I just woke up yes I am ok. Nothing since its been a couple of days. I am really worried I lost my last and final chance. ITS EASY FOR MANY OR MOST OF YOU PEOPLE OUT THERE READING THIS TO SAY MOVE ON BUT WHEN THERE IS A SPECIAL BOND BETWEEN THE TWO HOW CAN YOU MOVE ON?


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