A man came home one afternoon, & announced that he had won Million in the lottery, & asked his wife where she wanted to go. Anywhere outside the country. She was elated! She said, "I have always wanted to go to Paris!" So he called the travel agency & booked a flight for her to Paris. "Me?", she asked. JUST then a MUCH younger woman walked in the living room. "I’m divorcing you, & marrying her.", he said. She asked for 2 days to pack her stuff before she left. He said, "All right. I’ll give you 2 days, but you better not take anything that isn’t exclusively YOURS!" She waited until he had left with the young lady. She went to the store & bought 2 pounds of shrimp. When she got back, she cooked all the shrimp, & ate them. She divided the shells, & put some in EACH of the curtain rods in the ENTIRE house. She left the NEXT morning. The next day, the husband & new wife moved in. At first there was nothing amiss. True to her word, the Ex-Wife didn’t take anything that wasn’t exclusively HERS. The next day the new couple noticed an ODD smell. They couldn’t place it. They looked ALL over the house, but couldn’t find the source. They bought incense to cover it up. A few days later, it didn’t help. They tried cleaning ALL the carpets, floors, & furniture. It STILL didn’t help. FINALLY it got to be TOO much for the couple, & they decided to move. They took their essentials, stayed in a Hotel until they could find a new house. They found one, & paid movers to get their stuff & move them. The movers were paid well, so they made sure to move everything, including the CURTAIN RODS!
She spent the first day packing her belongings into boxes, crates and suitcases.
On the second day, she had the movers come and collect her things.
On the third day, she sat down for the last time at their beautiful dining room table by candlelight,put on some soft background music and feasted on a pound of shrimp, a jar of caviar and a bottle of Chardonnay.
When she had finished, she went into each and every room and deposited a few half-eaten shrimp dipped in caviar, into the hollow of the curtain rods.
She then cleaned up the kitchen and left.
When the husband returned with his new girlfriend, all was bliss for the first few days.
Then slowly, the house began to smell. They tried everything; cleaning, mopping and airing the place out.
Vents were checked for dead rodents and carpets were steamed.
Air Fresheners were hung everywhere. Exterminators were brought in to set off gas canisters,during which they had to move out for a few days,and in the end even paid to replace the expensive wool carpeting.
Nothing worked. People stopped coming over to visit.
Repairmen refused to work in the house. The maid quit.
Finally, they could not take the stench any longer and decided to move.
A month later, even though they had cut their price in half,they could not find a buyer for their stinky house.
Word got out and eventually even the local Realtors refused to return their calls.
Finally, they had to borrow a huge sum of money from the bank to purchase a new place.
The ex-wife called the man and asked how things were going. He told her the saga of the rotting house.
She listened politely and said that she missed her old home terribly,and would be willing to reduce her divorce settlement in exchange for getting the house back.
Knowing his ex-wife had no idea how bad t he smell was,he agreed on a Price that was about 1/10th of what the house had been worth,but only if she were to sign the papers that very day.
She agreed and within the hour his lawyers delivered the paperwork.
A week later the man and his girlfriend stood smiling as they watched the moving company pack everything to take to their new home….
including the curtain rods.
I LOVE A HAPPY ENDING, DON’T YOU?????
Nope! It’s a ’shrimp’y deal!!!
