I know i’m doing the right thing but it’s still really hard. It’s been 2 1/2 years and it’s just not working but I still love him. Advice please? It wasn’t a bad break up or anything, I just need encouragement that people out there have gone through the same thing and are okay 
He’s Torn Between Leaving And Staying:
My boyfriend and I broke up less than two days ago. I love him more than anything in the world, but I made our relationship very difficult because of my emotional instabilities.
I will do anything to get him back.
I am going to counseling to deal with my issues (they apply to my life in general, not just to my relationship with him), I’m reading self-help books, and I’m giving him as much space and time as he needs. I’m not forcing him to come back, but I hope more than anything that he does.
There really is no one else for me, and I think that I can really make him happy once I become a better person. But I want to be a better person not just for him, but for myself, for everyone else I love.
How can I convince him to give me another chance? He loves me dearly, I know. He told m yesterday (he sought me out himself) that he’s miserable without me, but the thought of getting back together doesn’t make him happy either, because I hurt him so much. He hugged me for half a minute, kissed me very passionately, told me he loved me, and then said “I shouldn’t have done that.”
He’s torn between leaving and staying, and I just want him to stay, to just give me another chance to make him happy like he made me happy.
I’m leaving him completely alone so that he can make a decision on his own. I’m trying to exemplify the person I’m promising to be in the future by being supremely kind, understanding, and emotionally stable. I’m a determined person, and I really can change. Not just for his happiness, but for my own.
I even wrote a letter to him explaining how committed I am to making us work, how even if he chooses not to stay, I’ll find a way to repay him for the wonderful things he’s done to me, that I’ll love him forever (I haven’t sent it to him yet. Don’t know if I should).
But is there a way to convince him to stay, to give me a chance to make him happy? Am I doing the right thing now? I don’t want to push him, because I want him to be happy and secure in his decision. But can I convince him somehow without pushing him?
Oh and we’ve had some fantastically good times, too. We both know this. He’s just overwhelmed at the moment by the not-so-good ones. All I can think about are the happy times, and how I want to make them happen again.
Any advice for me?
Does no contact when you want your boyfriend back work? He broke up with me last Saturday because I confessed a lie to him and he said that once he fixed himself up we could try again but I am starting to not believe that. We went no contact until I called him Tuesday to check on me and he never called back. I just told myself that it is over and I didn’t try to call or email again. I am accepting the break up and the possibility that we may never get back together again. Does he miss me? Am I doing the right thing by moving on? We talked at least 4 hours a day and were on the computer instant messaging all through the day while we worked. I can still see his status on face book and it still says in a relationship and his instant message program still shows our picture together. Does he just need time to regroup? Will he come back out of his man cave? Am I doing the right thing by preparing for the inevitable future without him?
People make mistakes and I made a huge one. I am not perfect and I came to him with the truth. He didn’t find out from anyone else or have an inclination that I lied to him. I wanted to be mature and fix the situation between us and if he can’t forgive me or doesn’t want to be with me through the tough parts and the thick and thin, then maybe he wasn’t the one for me. I should be able to come to my partner and tell my partner the good, bad and ugly about me and he has the choice of accepting me or not. The partner that accepts me for who I am with all of my flaws is the partner for me.
Does no contact when you want your boyfriend back work? He broke up with me last Saturday because I confessed a lie to him and he said that once he fixed himself up we could try again but I am starting to not believe that. We went no contact until I called him Tuesday to check on me and he never called back. I just told myself that it is over and I didn’t try to call or email again. I am accepting the break up and the possibility that we may never get back together again. Does he miss me? Am I doing the right thing by moving on? We talked at least 4 hours a day and were on the computer instant messaging all through the day while we worked. I can still see his status on face book and it still says in a relationship and his instant message program still shows our picture together. Does he just need time to regroup? Will he come back out of his man cave? Am I doing the right thing by preparing for the inevitable future without him?
People make mistakes and I made a huge one. I am not perfect and I came to him with the truth. He didn’t find out from anyone else or have an inclination that I lied to him. I wanted to be mature and fix the situation between us and if he can’t forgive me or doesn’t want to be with me through the tough parts and the thick and thin, then maybe he wasn’t the one for me. I should be able to come to my partner and tell my partner the good, bad and ugly about me and he has the choice of accepting me or not. The partner that accepts me for who I am with all of my flaws is the partner for me.
i think my ex is early stage manic depressive to be honest! he keeps breaking up with me "convinced he’s doing the right thing" and then he comes back begging. before he does it he’ll start getting really withdrawn and stuff. i suspect manic depression because his mom has it and he was on anti-depressants for a year, came off them a few months before i met him. his friends don’t know this stuff but want to have a talk with him for giving me up because they think he’s ******* up his life because i was so good for him. any input on THAT is appreciated! anyway, i can’t be with someone like that.
it’s so hard to look at a photo of him or something, wait for a text back to say hello. it just hurts so much. is it better just to cut him out completely? i’m going to be going away in a month, i’ll be ok then. but i never wanted to just cut him out of my life because he was the best friend i ever had…but maybe i should? is it recommended?
getting guys isn’t a problem, they love me. i’m not the type to ever have a one-night stand though.
it’s just like there’s no one else i’d rather have right now, even though i don’t want to be with him anymore because he’s hurt me so much and let me down too many times for me to have faith in him again.
we had an amazing connection to. he was the best friend i’d ever had.
have you ever replaced something like that?
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