well he was my first love and my first time
im totally over him…but the way he hurt me
just affects my relationships now…its nearly been a year
and i don’t feel nothing for him anymore no hate…no love
ive been messed around by another boy which affected me

but not as much i managed to
get over him really fast
because the 1st one broke my heart
and i don’t even know if it was repaired…well im moved on now
got this boyfriend who treats me like the world…and i trust him
with all my heart.but the thought of that
scares me..t im trying to stop myself from trusting him because

i know deep down he wont hurt me but its like a brick walls around me
and i trust him but i have doubts about trusting him because
how the others have hurt me….

its like when he goes home…i cry because its like my ex left
my house had what he wanted from me and never came back
i never saw him again…so i feel im never going to see him again
even though he kisses me goodbye….

and i get moody with him when he drops a comment that doesn’t mean
bad but i make it the wrong way in my head,,,,im moody with him when he drops plans
which we arranged….well like today he said well for example: i do suffer with urine infections
which hurts like hell so before we do “anything” i ask him if he would wash hes hand
and i go for a pee after and before..because when ive got them

i cant go to college they stop me from walking they hurt so much
and the results say im getting them from bacteria getting pushed up
so i like to be safe so i can keep up on college… and he dropped a comment like so your going
to make every boy you have sex with in the rest of your life do this…well i know he didn’t mean it
as in im bu.gg.ering off but it made my heart sink..

i know he cares because when i tease him and say something about another boy such as on text he
will put an upset face and he says hes glad were together but that hurt me
, i tryed to never fall deep again

but it just happened and i cant loose him i do trust him so i know
it can work but im messed up a little inside… im OVER my ex
because i wouldn’t be with someone else if i wasn’t that would be wrong
and hes not just for comfort because the one who i wasn’t with
but messed me up recently (about september-october time) was for comfort
because when i found out he was messing me around

i got over him quick and relished i didn’t care….which i wouldn’t do again
because it just doesn’t help at all
but i know i love my boyfriend now
as i get the same strong feelings i just get paranoid what can i do to stop this
because i cant loose him? you really have to go though it yourself
to relies hoe much it affects you

Technorati Tags: bacteria, brick walls, doubts, first love, heart, hell, love, Pee, relationships, rest of your life, urine infections, wrong way

I just had a conversation with my husband, and he confided that he would like me to lose some weight. And no, he’s not an awful shallow person – we were talking about areas in our lives we could each improve on, and we asked eachother to be honest.

And I’m not suprised at all. When we got together, I weighed about 200lb, and right now I weigh 255. We’ve been married about 8 months, and that weight gain was all within the last year. I’m 5′5. I honestly know I need to lose weight, and I have tried several times. My husband tells me all the time that I am beautiful, and sexy, and that I turn him on. He is very affectionate, and I never feel like he judges me for my body – he loves me for me, I have no doubts.

A few weeks ago, I weighed 260, and I was able to lose 5lb by eating healthier and going on hikes. But somehow my will power just disappeared. I still walk and play with my dog in the park, but the eating has gotten out of control again. Food has always ruled my life, and I have always been heavy. I use food for comfort, boredom, fustration, and hunger.

Please don’t tell me it’s just a matter of will power – I already know this. My problem is.. it’s easier said than done.

I love my husband, and we want to make our life together long, happy, and healthy. Please don’t put him down for being honest with me – I told him theres some things he needs to work on also. I am willing to do anything I can to make him happy, and to make myself happy. Just like a mom would steal food for her starving kids… a fat wife should be willing to lose a few for her handsome, sexy hubby.

He’s 5′11 and weighs about 195. Very muscley and …Rawr!

Our sex life isn’t hurting any, believe me – this isn’t about looks. He said he wants me to lose weight so I would be happier with myself. I do have issues with how I look, and I pull the "Im so fat!" card more than I should. So he has a point.

Anyhow… what are your success stories? Has any BBW in my situation found a method that worked for her?

Technorati Tags: bbw, Beautiful, boredom, doubts, fustration, hunger, Lose Weight, mom, muscley, quot, rawr, several times, sex life, sexy hubby, shallow person, starving kids, success stories, Success Story, Weight Gain

My wife recently found out that I was having an emotional affair with another woman via my blackberry and we are thinking of divorce after 14 years of seemingly a normal up/down marriage.

When she confronted me with this I initially lied but confessed 5 mins later after a wave guilt

Poor decision making on my part as I met the younger woman through my job. We went to lunch three times and shared "how doing" and "whats going with you?" type of text messages over a 3/4 month period. The lunches were 1 group lunch and two lunches by ourselves.

My wife asked why.. and I gave her a very honest response of the different type of attention that I received from this other woman was something new and unexpected. I just liked the attention from this pretty woman and purposely hid this from my wife as I knew it was somewhat wrong.

I was never physical with this other woman but it doesn’t seem to matter to my wife much.. I feel like a total scumbag..

My wife questions my true intentions and doubts that we were not physical..I would doubt the same. .. I’ve lost her trust and friendship an want to try get it back..

Thoughts or ideas would be appreciated from today’s biggest Loser.

Technorati Tags: 5 mins, biggest loser, blackberry, divorce, doubts, emotional affair, friendship, group lunch, guilt, honest response, job, marriage, Met, poor decision, pretty woman, quot, text messages, thinking of divorce, three times, true intentions

I know that you are having an affair with my wife XXXXX. I love her very much and I want to save my marriage and keep my family together. Your relationship with XXXXX is NOT okay. This affair is coming in between us and making it impossible to heal our marriage. Please respect our marriage and end all contact with XXXXX immediately and forever.

If you so much as make any contact with XXXXX, either directly or indirectly, or if XXXXX even finds out about this e-mail, I will not only get LOUD about the affair, I will take LEGAL ACTION against you for alienation of affection. By-the-by (Note: by-the-by is a jab at "the other guy", who uses this phrase all the time) XXXXX does talk to me about everything, no matter how private the information, or how secretive you would ask her to be. Even if she tries to hide something, I can read her like a book. I’ve only been with her every day for almost 10 years.

If you contact her, I will know about it. Period. I already know stuff that you spoke with her about, as well as many of the things that you had discussed with her or did with her when she was at your house last Wednesday. I’m also aware of your dinner at XXXXXXX XXXXXX, and many details of your e-mail exchanges that she forwarded to me. I know of the secrets you shared with her about your mental condition, and XXXXX came to me crying when she told me about your time with her last Wednesday, and she has many times since said she is having doubts about our separation. For such a smart guy with a heart that is so susceptible and vulnerable to prolonged periods of agonizing darkness, you sure didn’t think.

If you now think you can pass a note to her under the table and expect her to keep a secret & not tell me, go ahead and throw the dice. It’s not just the XXXXXX XXXXXX XXXXXXX I can contact. I can also contact the director of the XXXXXXXXX XXXXXX XXXXXXX (his father), her family, your co-workers, etc… I’ll put a big huge spotlight on it, and my family & hers will treat it like a regular intervention.

If she decides to quit her job in order to avoid humiliation, that will be on your head, along with everything else.

If I go public, my claims and evidence will validate an already-existing rumor mill, and it will make things very uncomfortable for you both.

Just stop. Cold turkey. There is no reason for this to get any uglier for either of you. I care about Sarah, and she has a lot to lose, but I have a lot to gain and little to lose if this doesn’t end right here, right now, and forever.

I gave ten years of my young adult life to this marriage; I will make it my life’s mission to save it.
As to why I would want to be with my wife still:
Because she is the mother of my son, I love her, and even if she isn’t committed, I am. I DO have my limits, but they have not been reached yet. I am a very patient and forgiving person.
I am aware of the law in my state, and have read the compiled statutes. This is not blackmail, intimidation, or harassment. I do speak with my wife about it. She is in the fog of a new/exciting relationship and won’t end it herself. She also doesn’t think I will go as far as I will to make it end, and I’m not going to tell her if I don’t have to. My best course of action is to untangle them inconspicuously.

I’ve done much research before deciding this course of action. I just need to know if the letter is ok. Please and thank you.
Please… enough with the middle-brow advice and the suggestions that I divorce my wife. I AM being a MAN; a MAN doesn’t pack up and leave when stuff goes south. I’m not a coward; I’m not afraid that this will happen again. I am aware of the problems in my marriage, I am working toward making improvements in my life and in our relationship… I don’t need advice in that category, thank you.
Confronting the OTHER man face-to-face will not make me any more of a man than will sending him a letter. I feel my words are strong enough; meeting him face-to-face will only be seen as a threat and may end up with me being arrested. I have thought, researched, pondered, meditated, and considered WHAT I REALLY WANT, and HOW TO GO ABOUT GETTING IT. Once again, I am just asking for feedback on the letter.
Actually, she HAS forwarded me emails from him.
Here is some information for those curious about why I’m even bothering doing what I plan on doing:
http://ezinearticles.com/?Is-Your-Spouse-Caught-Up-in-an-Affair?–Stop-it-Now!&id=1869007

http://www.saveyourmarriagecentral.com/getinformed/articles/endingaffair.html
I don’t live in California. I live in Illinois.

Technorati Tags: 10 years, affection, Alienation, alienation of affection, amp, co workers, darkness, doubts, e mail, having an affair, heart, jab, love, mail exchanges, marriage, Phrase, prolonged periods, relationship, smart guy, spotlight, xxxxx, xxxxxx

Hey guys..

Me and my boyfriend been happily in love for a year until this summer he sat down with me and said that he don’t know if we’ll make it through uni when he is away..and he is going to a really far uni…he says it would be hard to see me and commit to me as i wont b there with him he says he really loves me but it might be possible that we’ll break up …
After that ive started doubting things and wether we should be together soo i would always pick on him for little things and argue with him cus i was so scared to lose him id have doubts and everytime we would have an argument i’d tell him maybe we shouldnt be together or i dont c us working out…but we would stay together then later on we would still argue and he would tell me he’s not commited enough for the stress and really wants to concentrate on his studies so he can make it to uni…he said that we should be having fun not arguing over little stupid things …then we decided to go on a break because i had so so many doubts but this break didnt help as we argued even more then we split up…we go the same college together so it was hard for us to move on everytime id see him in college he would hug me and kiss me and act like we were still together but he didnt want to get back with me cos of college work he wanted to do well….then we occasionally c each other and go cinema and one dayy he told me he really misses me and if there were a chance of us seein each other agen so we did for a bit then i text him saying whats happening with us are we back together or not he said he didnt no what he wanted soo it ended in a big argument again ..and we didnt speak then few days after that i was out with my mates and he were out aswell ..we ended up in the same place…one of the boys was trying it on me and he punched him..he just switched his mates said he still loves you thats why he’s done it…when before when we broke up he was saying how after us arguing so much his feelings changed later on that week he text me saying he really wants to be with me so we got back together everything was fine but we didnt tell each other " i love you" cus of the past break up and we was hurt…but then we started arguing agen and recently we split up again ..because of the whole uni thing and we have been so stressed lately we had an arguement n i told him to split up with me …he couldt later on that day i went to his house to pick up my things and then i said its over then yeah he said please give me few more days so i gave him space…next day he messaged me saying i miss you,i have faith in us …do you??so i said i do…then few hours later we spoke but he acted really off with me he aksed me if i wanted to go out for a drink and a good chat …so we did but he was breaking up with me..i was distraught what made him change his mind in a few hours?That night i stayed at his cos i wasnt in the state to go home so i slept in his spare room but he slept in the same bed wiith me calling me baby and cuddling me…we were still split up so i text him saying why u change ur mind n then break up with me then act like u dont wanna let me go he said he said that he was using his head not his heart atm then i said how hurt i was and he said that he was hurt also and he was really sorry that things were like that and he really did wish things were different and that it was just wrong time for us…i love him and so badly want to be with him…
He also apologised to me cos when he went to college he set himself a goal of not meeting or getting ith anyone but he said he couldnt help how he felt for me…he also said i was the first girl he ever felt close to since he been with his ex girlfriend of 2 years and that he’s been with many other girls but not got with any of them …he also said that i was literally perfect…does that make special?
What do i do know?Shalll i leave him alone?I feel like he wont ever get back with me cus of uni and so much stress cus of me doubting things over uni…when we broke up he said he’ll b there for me no matter what and to call him no matter what the problem was or time he ll always be there for me if i need him …but i said its better if we don;t speak so we can move on …then next he deleted me of myspace and facebook then ive asked him why he said i dnt want to see your profile especially when other boys chat to youu…i dont understand his behaviour does he love me or not and what do i do…do i leave him alone till he contacts me or just move on??He also said to me in the past that he wished he met me years later when he finished uni and was all settled in…specialy that he told me i was the first girlfriend since his ex gives me this hope that he will miss me and come back someday …after dating other girls and realise he wants me…so what do i do?

Technorati Tags: cinema, doubts, feelings, few days, having fun, hey guys, love, mates, one of the boys, Sat 100, stress, stupid things

Tricky one I guees

Basically I am going to meet the exgrilfriend I dumped a couple of weeks ago for a chat over everything that happened and I really fear getting back with her.. mainly because I never trusted her during our time together (8 months) but I still have strong feeling for her but just don’t think it’s right to be together because I know for sure I am going to start having doubts from the moment I decide to stay.

Technorati Tags: doubts, fear, strong feeling

I’m 18 years old and 6 weeks pregnant with my 2nd child by my ex boyfriend.We already have a 1 year old son.My ex boyfriend and I ended up having sex when my current boyfriend and I were on break and I’m pregnant.I’m having doubts about staying with my current boyfriend because he is too controlling.I haven’t told the boyfriend I’m with now about the baby yet.I was thinking about getting back together with my ex boyfriend.My ex boyfriend wants to make it work for our unborn child.Is it wrong to get back together with him just because we’re expecting a child?

Technorati Tags: 18 years, current boyfriend, doubts, expecting a child, having sex, unborn child