So fitting are the melodies
Softly playing in your heart.
Think of moment’s beauty lift
Until the second we must part.
Fascinations’ running wild
Option’s open wide all gates.
Longing’s for that gentle sway
Given to the one who waits.
Leaping into desolation
Reaching out with lonely eyes
Seeking long awaited answer’s
Fighting through emotion’s lies.
Loosing all constructed pride
Now giving in to chance
Fame once more this sleeping love
Awaken our long lost romance.
We are both 25. Dated 2 years. She broke up with me saying we are to different and i don’t show enough emotion on how i feel towards her. We talked of marriage etc. the whole thing. She texted me for a week after till i said it hurts stop. then 6 days later "hey you how was your weekend?" Then i wrote her a long letter telling her how i felt, showing the emotion she wanted. She rebuffed saying she cant right now. i asked her to talk face to face but she said she thought something might happen if we did. Now no contact for a week and i need to switch strategies, obviously. Her friends say there is no other guy and i see no signs of that. I know i need to do no contact for awhile to let the emotional dust settle. Should i just ignore her if she texts and try to make her want me? or keep in touch? how can i show her i have changed? i truly have. ladies help me out here how did your guy get u back? please no just move on answers…. whats my best strategy…. how can i show her if i cant see her?
i want to know the best strategy to get her back i want her back badly
I will try to make this a brief as possible. I love my wife, we are currently going through the worse part of our marriage now. I myself am able to distinguish lust from emotion, my wife not so lucky she is quite the opposite. She gets attached, recently she expressed the urge to kiss a lesbian. Me being the swinger ideal guy allows it with hopes of possibly seeing where it may spice our already great sex live up.
Fast forward a long talk and quite a few tears she has feeling strong feelings for this woman. She wishes to be with her, I feel powerless, I wish for her to be happy even at the cost of my own happiness. Yet I took an oath to stand by her no matter what. Lately I have become restless with the thoughts of my other self seeing the bad before the good. I am incapable of channeling my love to her, she wants to love again yet she is unable too.
I ask you the internet dwellers: Is there anything I can do to show her how much I wish for her to be madly in love me with me again?
No kids on an insanely awesome little Bull Terrier. The funny thing is, I exceed over everything the lesbian is. I have been there when she was crying, holding her telling her it will be alright we can get through it. Example: Out of the 10 times she has needed the new woman she has been able to talk twice! All 10 time I have been there. She begged her to come over and help solve this she refused.
I know swinging can open a can of worms. I am seeing now not all of us can turn that lust switch off and cut ties to emotions. It was a big mistake I am paying for now. I full fill her needs I offer massages, to cook dinner, go to movies, open the door still, kiss her head, rub her feet when shes cold, tell her I love her many times a day.
She does still speak to her, I know she may need to cut ties and only she can do that. It doesn’t help she feel inadequate for such a great guy as myself she has constantly said she doesn’t deserve my kindness, and I deserve better.
I have read notes, I have read cards, I am at the point where I feel I am fighting a lost cause. She is seeking help it just feel like this is going to drag out and I do not wish for that. She is quite indecisive which makes it worse. There is nothing more painful than seeing the one you love and hold over all others not love you back. She barely knows this woman yet holds her in such high regards, even over her own husband.
She, and even her mom do not know why I stay by her in this darkest time. I do, My oath to her, our family, our friends, and to God. I am just having such a hard time keeping positive. I thank you for all your answers thus far please keep them coming.
I have given her my all, every fiber of my being, every time I even thought of her I texted her, telling her I love you. Deep down we all have two sides, a light and a dark. My dark tells my light it has lost her and to move on make the choice for her & be done with it get on to the healing and the bitches. The few years invested can be re-couped.
Even if I feel it is slightly true, I still am bound by the honor of my word to stay with her till the bitter end. I will continue to strive to show her I care, I love, I wish to have her by my side. I will continue to support her in her seeking help, I would even attend sessions with her if she asked. I will because I love her. I wish nothing but the best for her be it with me or without i am her friend before all, I seek to see her happy, that is why I stay.
To show her I am there for her, to show her I stand by her side even in the face of such a monstrous task ahead of us. To pick her up when she has fallen and carry her on my back.
I’ve grown to know when I should stop being an obnoxious critic.
This applies towards all books I read.
The prime example you all might know quite well is Twilight.
In the past few months I grew quite snarky with it, and the face I own all 4 books and LE’s as well makes me me pitiful.
Here is my review:
For most teenage girls, it does make them a tad ignorant, but I can relate to the huge emotional and hormonal obsession it engulfs them in. They should learn to be less bubbly with their obsession and moderate, though, but the fact it shoudn’t be an obsession at all doesn’t help.
Meyer’s great with emotion, but she has a huge issue with structure.
Her emotions are a bit played out for me now.
My generation doesn’t see the cliche in some things, and even my brother agrees he sees nothing in this book that hasn’t been done before, though it does have some well written parts.
The only book I look upon to admire is Twilight, and very few portions of it at that.
I will remain anti to an extent, but I’m a Twilight lover at heart.
I keep myself convservative.
And I’m aware she is slightly bad at writing, and there’s much more great literature out there.
I don’t regret drawing mustaches on the movie posters all those months ago, though, teehee. =^.^= I mean, it was very fun. Though very immature.
Antis, you have more dignity than actually taking shots at Twi-hards.
You can state your dignified opinions, but you shouldn’t state obnoxious remarks.
And..Twi-tar- I mean hards.
Eh. There’s nothing I can say to you that you haven’t already heard, just don’t be stubborn. You’ll evolve at some point, I hope.
What’s your take on the situation?
LMAO. god forbid they get common sense now.
For years I’ve had book ideas in my head but never had the motivation to focus and actually write them down.
I also know that once I start, it would become (and have to be) an obsession. I’m the sort of person who stays awake all night to finish something I’ve started, even if I have time the next day to do it. I read all 4 Twilight books within a week and it consumed my every thought during that time (saw the movie for the 2nd time last night so it’s returned to my thoughts again!).
I read all 7 Harry Potter books in 2 weeks and grieved their disappearance when I’d finished the last one.
I don’t do things by halves!
It’s because I recognise this single-minded preoccupation in myself that I procrastinate when it comes to starting something I enjoy doing. I KNOW I’ll become manic and fixated on it and rob time away from my family and friends to feed it.
But, finally I have some time to be obssessed by a project and have thought of a concept that has really inspired me and managed to tear me away from Twilight websites! It’s something I really want to write and that I would want to read.
Problem is, I can’t get my head around a setting for the concept. I have the characters in my head and the emotion of the story, I just can’t piece it together in a way that makes the story interesting, believable and relevant.
The basic idea I have is (surprise, surprise) a love story. I’m a sucker for heartbreaking love stories and I know I want the love story to be the central thread the story is created around.
So here is the nucleus of my story, I just need some help with the setting and conflict.
Girl and Boy (18ish, strangers to each other) have grown up knowing they will have an arranged marriage – some sort of political agenda?
As they get older they (girl especially) rebel against not having a choice in who they marry and they want to marry for love.
Girl meets boy in neutral place that doesn’t give away who each of them are. They fall in love over a few clandistine meetings without knowing who each other really are (the "who they really are" part is one of the things I need help with and will be dependant on setting).
Girl is given birthday gift of a glimpse into the future which predicts that disaster (to her family or herself) will occur if she marries her betrothed.
She takes this to mean that the arranged marriage is cursed and she must avoid it at all costs which ties in nicely with her wanting to choose anyway.
Until she knows who the betrothed is, she won’t be able to figure out what the disaster will be if she married him and so she can’t go to her parents to dissuade them from an arranged marriage. She must hold the secret until the puzzle makes sense in order to avert the disaster and save her family/herself.
INTRODUCING HEARTBREAKING LOVE TWIST
When she is introduced to her betrothed, it is the boy she is in love with.
She can’t marry him because he is the betrothed one, but she can’t be with anyone else because it is him she loves.
They are now able to spend lots of time with each other under the pretence of getting to know their betrothed before the wedding, but instead they fall deeper in love and at the same time recognise the reason why the union will end in disaster (insert your idea here!).
Seeing no way around the problem, Girl flees in hopes that Boy will forget her and marry someone else.
Anguish, despair, tears etc etc etc for month on both sideas.
Boy believes Girl mustn’t love him and so agrees to another betrothal.
In the mean time, Girl discovers a solution to quandry (insert idea here) and rushes back to find Boy, only to be told he is to marry someone else.
More tears, angst, self-torture etc etc.
At altar Boy realises he can’t marry anyone but Girl and walks out on marriage determined to end his life.
At 11th hour Girl and Boy manage to get to each other and vow to never leave each other but to work together on solving conflict.
End book 1.
Book 2 – working together, Girl and Boy try to avoid the future shown to girl and allow them to marry. In process Girl and Boy must separate AGAIN for the sake of the bigger picture. Perhaps girl must pretend she will marry someone else for political strategy with Boy watching on helpless?
Book 3 – conclusion and Girl and Boy FINALLY get it together.
Um, er, that’s it.
That’s what I have going round and round my head and I’m desperately trying to mold it around a setting and conflict I’m comfortable writing about.
So far I have considered and 90% discounted an Indian setting (arranged marriage) because I’m not comfortable with writing a Bollywood novel which is how I imagine it would turn out.
The other option is a fantasy land in days of yore a’la Lord of the Rings. However, I’m not a huge fantasy reader and it doesn’t appeal to me to write something that I wouldn’t be attracted to read myself.
The thought of creating a whole other world is quite daunting and I’m rubbish at invent
Wow! Thanks for the responses so far. Ry-Guy esp. Never in a million years considered the crime/mob angle but it does mean I get to keep my modern setting. Unbelievable food for thought. I’ve got butterflies just anticipating fleshing it out.
I’d still appreciate other thoughts while I ponder a Soprano style setting.
I’ve been dealing with a breakup from a girl I’ve been with for the past three years. We met at the end of senior year in high school. I went to school 10 hours away freshman year and we stuck through it. I felt stronger and stronger about her each day. I decided to come back home and go to school with her for sophomore year. Again, it was a fantastic year and I loved every minute I spent with her. We were best friends, inseparable and we connected on a very deep level. I knew I loved this girl but I felt like I needed to go back to my first school to get a significantly better degree. At the end of sophomore year I told her I wanted to go back. She began to pull away until I told her I was doing it for us and to better my future. That made her feel better but she still pulled back. I kind of changed too as a result. I felt weird about her actions and I knew she took my leaving as a slap in the face. I began to be more short with her and our relationship took a turn for the worst. I thought everything was fine until one day a couple weeks before I left that she came in my bedroom as I woke up and said she wanted to be single the next year. She said the way I had been acting, the distance, and everything made her want this. I went through many stages of falling apart, anger, upset, numb, happy, just every emotion. A few weeks ago I got to school and my feelings stabilized. I realized that this is a girl worth fighting for. I took a look at myself and the way I had acted to push her away. I think God forced me to make the decision to leave to better myself and now I feel like I can be the most amazing boyfriend to her. I’m now going back home because I don’t feel this is the place for me right now. This decision was not because of her, but it doesn’t hurt that the love of my life is there. She’s been kind of seeing somebody now. She says she likes him but still loves me. She asks me why I’d deserve a second chance after hurting her. She says maybe in a few years we can try again. I know I’ve changed and I know that our relationship is right. I know I can be everything this girl could ever want. I know her better than anyone in the world. We are still best friends. I’m afraid she’s already written me off because she is unsure and doesn’t want to be hurt again, even though she hasn’t told me this. I’m going back in a few days and I’ve gotten her to go to dinner with me this upcoming weekend. She says its strictly as friends. I want to show her I can be a great boyfriend but how can I do this as just a friend? How can I show her I’ve changed and will always make her happy? What about this other guy, I’ve been supportive but how do I approach it? If you’ve read this far then I really appreciate it and I look forward to hearing back. Thanks.
No need to be a dick Linah. Thanks to everyone else who’s taking me seriously
@ LM: correction, shes not with another guy just seeing him. she says she doesn’t want to be his girlfriend even though hes asked…makes me think even more shes confused as to what to do
A few weeks ago my wife told me she loves me but is no longer in love. The issues she says caused this are today gone and she knows that. (The issues were that for years I had a very opinionated and controlling personality and that I never got as close to her son as I should have. I realize that those controlling feelings of there is a “right way” or a “safe way” to act were wrong and I will never be like that again. And, I have made amends with her son and will love him forever like my own.) Other than those personality issues, I was a great husband to her. (Never abusive, always loving, always complimentary, very supportive, etc.) We are going to counseling now.
I’d love for you to share – what are things that you did or your spouse did or you & your spouse did that helped rekindle the romance, bring those feelings back, and help you “fall in love” again? How long might this take? It has only been two days since she decided to try to reconcile. Yesterday we spent the whole day together doing stuff (errands, lunch, movie, had a late beer, etc.) – but no emotion from her – no kisses, no hand holding, etc. I know it is very soon but that was REALLY hard for me. I’m trying …
Can you help me (us)?
A few weeks ago my wife told me she loves me but is no longer in love. The issues she says caused this are today gone and she knows that. (The issues were that for years I had a very opinionated and controlling personality and that I never got as close to her son as I should have. I realize that those controlling feelings of there is a “right way” or a “safe way” to act were wrong and I will never be like that again. And, I have made amends with her son and will love him forever like my own.) Other than those personality issues, I was a great husband to her. (Never abusive, always loving, always complimentary, very supportive, etc.) We are going to counseling now.
I’d love for you to share – what are things that you did or your spouse did or you & your spouse did that helped rekindle the romance, bring those feelings back, and help you “fall in love” again? How long might this take? It has only been two days since she decided to try to reconcile. Yesterday we spent the whole day together doing stuff (errands, lunch, movie, had a late beer, etc.) – but no emotion from her – no kisses, no hand holding, etc. I know it is very soon but that was REALLY hard for me. I’m trying …
Can you help me (us)?
So, did your partner (oops! Now your "ex") just declare that it was all over between you both? You must be going through a very rough patch now. Life must seem meaningless and black and white to you. We understand.
Go Here To Find The Magic Recipe For Making Up
But then there are certain things that you need to understand as well about the stages of breaking up. No matter what you lose in life there are stages that you go through every time you break away from something or someone.
These stages of break up can be categorized under the following heads:
1. Shock: How did you react when he/she called it quits? Weren’t you shocked? Maybe even speechless for a quite a few seconds! You are not the only one to have reacted this way. Most of the people, when exposed to the prospect of a break up get too shocked to react. There are so many people around the globe who get shocked and thus become dumb when subjected to the news of a dear one’s death.
2. Denial: Those people, who don’t react to the news of a loss by getting shocked, inevitably try to deny the fact that they have lost something or someone. You will find many people simply disbelieving and discrediting the fact that a near one is dead even though there is evidence enough to prove the death. In romantic affairs, people tend to make themselves believe that the whole situation is a joke.
3. Anger/and depression: even if you have never experienced it yourself, you must have noticed the presence of these patters in people around you who are going through the stages of breaking up. Once the idea of the loss sinks in the person starts to ponder on what he/she has lost, and this of course leads to depression. In case of those who want to pretend that the loss has not affected them the change takes over them in the form of increased anger. They tend to over react to things and become very short- tempered.
4. Acceptance: as it is said, everything has a limit. And it is the same even with the changes that take over you due to a break-up. Time is the best healer of a broken heart from love. Always remember that. And so you will not realize it yourself how quickly the effect of your loss starts to wear off and you get ready for moving ahead in life for new relations and new achievements. But then always remember that even though time heals every wound and you will definitely overcome your stages of breaking up there is something you need to remember. You also need to give life a chance to give you new happiness and new possessions. What has been lost cannot be retrieved but if you welcome the gifts that life bestows on you then you will surely be able to retrieve your happiness.
So don’t hesitate to move on in your life. Remember that time waits for none!!
Go Here To Discover The Magic Of Making Up Now!
How to effortlessly make your ex want to come back to you without begging or using "fake" persuasion tricks and "sneaky" manipulation tactics visit: http://www.MendABreakup.com
Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Daniel_Hartman
Related Blog Posts:
Saving A Relationship After Breaking Up
Almost nearly every adult as experienced some kind of a break up, and most just work on moving on rather than looking for ways to get an ex back. But if you are over playing the victim and [...]
Do you miss your boyfriend a lot after you broke up and would give the world to have him back, then it’s a wise decision to think things through before you make your move.
Im Having Trouble Dealing With Break Up
As I have told so many, you have two ways to go about dealing with break up. First, and you are going to say WHAT?? but its true the first thing you must do [...]
Can You Save Your Marriage?
When you are having trouble dealing with break up it is only natural. There is nothing to be ashamed of because everyone does.
Tips To Repair A Broken Relationship
If you fell that she is the one for you and it is destined that you are to be together, don’t give up. Achieving happiness should be a top priority in any person’s life.
How To Get Your Ex Back If You Were Too Controlling
The question is, did you learn something from the experience of being dumped by your mate. If so, that is something that can actually help you get your ex back.
