My ex boyfriend and I were together for 4 years and had decided to get married. However, things with his life got so busy – he was in college full time, starting two businesses, and holding a part-time job on the side. He was never around, and would be home maybe a few hours at night to sleep. He’d promise to spend time with me, go to dinner, etc and it wouldn’t happen.

I on the other hand, had just graduated college and felt like my life was turned upside down. I couldn’t find a good job and i’d been offered an opportunity to move abroad and work, travel, and become fluent in my second language. I finally couldn’t take feeling torn anymore and made a rash decision, leaving my boyfriend, even though I loved him so much, to focus on me and do what I wanted to do.

I was an idiot and got into a 5-monthish rebound relationship while abroad. The guy was wrong for me and I didn’t feel all that strongly about him, so I broke it off. I also never stopped loving my ex, I was dreaming about him, and everything – my new boyfriend, my job, my life – just made it all the more clear that I wasn’t happy and I wanted to be back. I came back home two weeks ago and have sene my ex a few times since then. The first night he was flirty, touching me a bit, talking to me a lot, but since then he doesn’t talk to me much. A mutual friend told me my ex is really upset that I dated someone else while we were apart.

I would do anything to be back with this man because he is the love of my life, and once you’ve been in a relationship with someone that makes you so happy, nothing else can compare. I’m willing to put in the work, make the sacrifices, do whatever is necessary to make it work and show him I’m serious about my feelings for him. But I don’t know how to show him this when he won’t talk to me! What do I do?



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So I meet this girl at the club a few weeks ago. She invites me out one night with her and her girl. So I go out there and her friend is talking to the bar-back because I guess they are F-Buddies and we all decide to go to another bar. While there I’m talking to her friend at the bar and this dude pulls her aside and starts telling my girl that he made a mistake sleeping with her friend and he wants to be with her and he kisses her (I had no clue this was going on). Then she comes back to me and tells me that he told her he made a mistake with the friend, but fails to mention anything else. Anyway her friend and him slept together that night and the next day he tries to pick up my girl again. So that’s the beginning of the drama with her. This is the first night we have hung out since we met.

Well also during that night she tells me that she answered an ad for a housekeeping job and when she got there the 60 year old man (shes 22) who placed the ad told her he wasn’t looking for a housekeeper but a wife. He is loaded and would give her 0,000, pay for her college, buy her cars, blah blah blah. She asked me if I would still be her boyfriend if she married him. I told her that I didn’t know, maybe if it was strictly a business relationship between the two of them.

Well the next day she fills in the huge details that she left out the night before. She tells me that the dude kissed her and she tells me that not only does the old guy want to get married but he wants her to have his kid too. What the hel?

So now shes pressing me on if I want to stay with her. I really don’t know if I should get involved if shes going to be in another relationship. It may be okay now, but what happens when we start seeing each other and I start to love her? I think I will just be setting myself up to get hurt if I do. I told her I need to even see if we are right for each other first so I would make up my mind after we dated a few weeks.

2 days later: She asks me last minute to go to a Halloween party with her since her friend cant go. I tell her I have plans, but she pleads for me to go. So I give in, I go to her place and shes like "Wheres your costume?" even though she didn’t tell me I needed one. Now its this huge deal that everyone HAS to have a costume. All the stores are closed so I agree to go in drag. So we go driving around to all her friends houses to find me clothes. So then I go and meet all her friends at this party dressed up like a chick. It’s embarrassing as hell but I did it as a favor to her. So during the night it came up that I was getting off probation for something minor shortly. Also she asked me something about sex and my ex’s and I told her that I ususally date girls who have a kinky side to them and she cops this attitude and is distant to me the whole night, then she just gets up and leaves me (even though I asked her at the beginning to do me one favor of not leaving me alone at the party). So we get back to her place and shes all distant to me still and says she doesn’t want to have sex with me because I’m a different person than she thought I was. I asked her how and shes like "You seemed like a nice guy when I met you then I find out you date kinky girls and your on probation, why don’t you just go date Rachel (her friend from the beginning of the story)"

What is up with this girl? Why cant I find a decent girl? Or maybe its just me. Did I do something wrong?

Are there any cute sane women in the Tampa area? If so, hit me up :-)

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about 2 months ago i caught my girlfriend seeing someone else, i forgave her for it and then just last week i caught her doing it again with the same guy so i had her move out, i suspect that this has been going on for about 3-4 months ( we were together 4 years and have a child together) she said that she really didn’t have a good reason for doing this although these are some of the things she also said( i never had the chance to have my freedom, i am unhappy and i don’t know exactly why, i just need some time) so the first night she spent away from our house she came back the very next morning teary eyed and said she wanted to be together, then later that day she changed her mind back to the i need time bit etc… so since then she has spent all her time with this guy now mind you it has only been three days, let me tell you about this guy he is a 43 year old painter, never married no children , hangs out in strip clubs..jiggalo perhaps?lol, she is 24, we still talk and have made a good arangment with our son, you may ask yourself why would i want her back? well it is because i love her very much and i want us to be a family, i know what she did is very bad, so what i want to know is what are the steps to get her back from beginning to end, i do not want links to websites trying to sell me books, thank you for reading


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How do I get my ex boyfriend back, and how do I know if he still likes me at all?

This is long but please help, anyway. My ex-boyfriend and I are in 8th grade. Back in October and November and December we dated, and it was a great relationship.

We both told each other that we loved the other, but it wasn’t the shallow kind he didn’t say it for about a month, so I know it was real. SO: Flash forward. I was the lead in the school musical, he was a techie, so we got to hang out a lot. Due to my mom being insane, I was notified with three days notice that when I went to visit my dad for Christmas, that I would not be coming home, as a “punishment.”

So when I told him that I would be leaving after final day of the play, he said. “…F**k. My God, that really sucks.” Than we had to get to class, so that was that. So first night of the performance, he surprised me with beautiful flowers and kissed me on the cheek, said, “You were wonderful,” even though was really bad.

I started crying half because I did so bad, half because of me leaving. I was crying with a bunch of my friends afterwords, and I looked really bad. Second and last night of the performance: I did much better! At the cast party, everybody was signing stuff and everybody was crying and stuff, and my bf said come on, let’s go where noone will bother us. So he put his arm around my waist and we went backstage the long way.

Then when we were alone in the dark, he said, “When you leave, I want you to find a nice group of friends who will watch your back. I want you to find a nice guy (so he broke up with me) who will never let ANYONE hurt you. And I want you to remember that everyone here loves you and will miss you, I more than anyone, and I always will.” I had stopped crying, but back came the waterworks.

Then he kissed me, and I said ” I love you” back. Than we walked back to everyone else, and when I left, he had a few tears on his face, and I have known him for 3 years and never seen him cry, and his best friend says he hasn’t either.

Flash forward: after 3rd quarter, I convinced my mom to let me come back. So three and half months later, I’m back, and when I get there after everyone hugged and stuff, he comes over to me and starts talking. Than in homeroom, he comes up to me and says, “So are we still going out?” This ticked me off a little cause he had dated someone in between but they had broken up. so I said, ” No, cause usually when somebody breaks up w/ somebody, and starts dating sum1 else, they’re not still dating.

Friends, though right?” This is where I think I made my big mistake: I meant no, not STILL, but if he a asked me out again, I would totally say yes. Plus I didn’t know if he meant that he still liked me or if he was trying to do his duty. so

Question 1: Do you think that meant he still liked me?

Question 2: Do you think that he thought that when I said that it meant I didn’t like him anymore?

But anyway, now, he is dating one of my friends, but we talk alot and he broke up with her after 2 weeks and when I asked him why he said I just don’t feel like we have a connection, but they got back together, and it doesn’t seem like they do. But I noticed some things: In one class, I have the class w/ both him and his gf. She sits next to me, and he will sit across from us.

But sometimes we will get a conversation going and his gf won’t even be part of it, and he stares at me alot. and his feet are always pointed twords me not his gf.

Question 3: how would you interperit the whole situation in general?

Question 4: please give me any tips on the two questions in main answer and also, how can I do this without hurting my friend if he does like me at all? If at all possible?

Thanks for sitting through that…

Marine Wife: I did not ask this question so you could pass judgement on me. So you say don’t waste your time on Middle School relationships because you will marry someone else anyway? WHAT a narrow mind. So are you trying to say that if you don’t marry the person it was a waste of time, that your love didn’t mean a thing?

My fifth grade teacher has been married for 30 years, and had been off and on dating her husband since she was 13. So, it’s possible. And if love doesn’t lead to marriage that doesn’t make it pointless. Don’t answer the question if you’re going to try to try to pass your words of “wisdom” on to me, that’s not what I want. I’m looking for advice, not for some strabger to tell me how to live my life.

Marine Wife: Yes, I will remeber dating him; everybody remembers they’re first love


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