My DH and I have tried to conceive for 7 months. We went through one miscarriage – and our relationship seemed to be stronger for what we have gone through.
I finally got my BFP on Wednesday. My DH was out of town, and I couldn’t reach him as he seemed to vanish except one text msg. I started cramping on Friday and went to the MD – they said no fetal heartbeat but a sac and to wait and see. When I finally reached my DH – he said nothing except "I am confused over my ex wife."
I went to the MD today and everything is beautiful with the baby. My hCG levels are not increasing quite as quick as they should be so that is very concerning but the baby is there – 8 weeks 3 days and has a heart rate of 171. It was amazing to hear and I burst into tears because I was there alone. I told my doctor and she is horrified as she knows we have been trying. Anyway…
Well I told him not to come home Sunday night – to go somewhere else and he did. I am with my family so I am not alone and today he tells me he is going back to his ex wife. When I told him we are having a baby and the baby is fine, he says he wants to know if I would allow he and his ex wife to have the baby live with them because she is sterile and they always wanted a baby. OMG – is he off his rocker? We aren’t children – he is 38 and I am 28. Not that it matters, but I am a clean cut, alcohol and drug free woman with a stable home, great job, etc and he leaves me when I am pregnant and thinks he is going to take MY BABY to play house with his ex wife?
To say I became hysterical, sobbing and irrate is a gross understatement. I told him over my dead body will that happen and he said he "didn’t want to miss all the firsts and time with the baby" but I am supposed to because he is a selfish SOB? I told him that is the price you pay when you leave your pregnant wife – you don’t get to have it all.
The crappy part is that I am crushed, devestated, irrate and heartbroken. I have this little miracle growing beneath my heart and I know that my DH is wrapped in the arms of his ex wife as we speak. He told me she said "She will love the baby as her own" so I shouldn’t worry about how she will feel towards the baby. I am devestated. I feel like my soul is being ripped out of my chest and my lungs cannot even breath my heart aches so much.
What do I do? I want to hate him, but I am so madly in love with him that my heart is in a million little pieces. My OB/GYN told me she cannot imagine what I am going through, but said this stress is not good for the baby. How do I do this?
I need advice…
