Ok … I have been married for over 20 years and we have 2 boys a home and so much more but my wife has fallen out of love with me and there is no sex for over 1/ 2 years. I would like to know what i can do to help her fall back again so she will want to have sex again. She may have sex is i pressure her but she would not love me back or go through the motions. I know women or emeotional and they need to fill good and love there man to want to have sex. Its not just a chore for her just because we are married. I want her to love me again. She loves are kids so much that i dont think shhe has any room for her husband. She never wants to do anything together or go out on a date or a getaway with out the kids . Only if the kids are with us. So there is not much i can do to spend time with her. I help at home and all the chores and i give her back rubs and foot messages and i tell her she is attractive all the time. She is a good cook and a great mom and all is good. There are things she complains about and i do listen but i just dont wish to change so much that i am not the same as i have always been. How can i regain her love again.??? She is 43 and i am 50….
My man and I had promised each other before moving to our new location that what happened in our old location stays in our old location. I have made conscious efforts not to mention exes or previous boyfriends. He was married once before, and I understand that they still have business-type loose ends (like a car that she has that he is paying for even after the divorce because she refuses to). However, he still keeps bringing her up and I am sick of hearing about her. For instance, I have been trying to find a job (I was laid off prior to our moving) and he decided to mention how his ex would quit her job in the morning and find another one by nightfall (let’s bear in mind that these were retail and restaurant jobs where the employers never thought to check and see if she was a job hopper. I am not past working those types of jobs, but I have been interviewing for jobs with better benefits and pay so that I can pay my own way and not sponge off him like she did). Of course, that ticked me off.
Then, he and his dad got into an argument because when he married his ex, his family never came to the wedding. Mind you, this argument occurred six months after the divorce was final, and occurred right in front of me, which I found rude. There have been other instances where he would mention what a good cook she was and a few other things. I am certain he is not wanting to go back to her (of course, I know it is not impossible, I am not stupid). The woman stole his money, furniture, and car, plus left him for another man while he was out to sea, and has other issues as well. I am glad he has some fond memories of her, despite all this, but I am really sick of hearing about it. I had a rather tempestuous relationship with my ex, and truthfully find it hard to remember the good times, but have decided to let it go, not only in accordance with the agreement with my man but also because I want to move on and make new memories in my new life. It is hard to do that when his ex is constantly being brought up. He doesn’t understand why I am so angry but has made an effort to stop talking about her. I don’t mind that he has happy memories of her, but am I wrong to not want to hear about them anymore?



