My husband and I have been married for 7 years we have a little boy together. We were separated for 9 months and he came back to visit me and my son recently so we could work on our family.
My husband has this female best friend that he’s known for 20+ years he knew her since school. He said he and her never dated or had a relationship besides being friends. This woman told my husband that I cut her off from him back in the day when I never said that. Since my husband never introduced me and her together I introduced myself to her via email (he was there when I sent the email and he knew every word I wrote) and she twisted my words around making me look like a bad person and my husband felt the same way saying I cut him off from her and he also resents me for it!!! I told my husband I am your wife you knew everything I said to her via email I never cut y’all off and that you always had her contact info the least you could do is defend me. He said he didn’t defend me cuz he didn’t wanna be with me anymore I told him you were still with me at that time and you are still with me now! He said I’m controlling and jealous and that I have trust issues and if our marriage is going to survive I have to trust him!
When he came back to visit us, I found a couple of emails he wrote to another woman (I was using his laptop one day). I did some research and it turns out this woman is an internet webcam stripper from iFriends whom he befriended. He spent lots of money on her. He is a guillable man and believes everything the stripper tells him. I told him that he needs to quit talking to this webcam stripper because it’s harming our marriage and he told me to leave her out of it and that he had already spent alot of money on her around 00 for her private shows. He still emailed her wishing her a Happy New Year. He said he only considers her as a friend and isn’t interested seeing her naked anymore and he said that she is a good person and she gave him the emotional support he needed when we were separated and he told me he doesn’t like when I refer this woman as a webcam stripper. And then he said he doesn’t want to lose her as a friend and if I tell him to quit contact with her he will just become more distant to me. I asked him "Why should befriend a stripper what do I have in common with her besides you saw us both naked??!"
I do not know what to do anymore I am trying to save my marriage and stop my divorce but I feel I can’t do it without his help. I had already filed for divorced and he also filed when he was served divorce papers. We both told our divorce lawyers to hold on to our papers so we can try to salvage our marriage but I feel like I am the only one who’s trying on my own.
I went to counseling. I read lots of relationship and marriage books. I try to be the best wife he says I’m beautiful and sexy but apparently I am not good enough for him.
I need advice help!
i do not plan on dating when i am still married even when I’m separated i don’t want to committ adultery.
