Hello,
I came across this forum looking for some information. I wanted to just basically get everyone’s opinion about the whole situation. My gf has been living with me for about 2 months, she has recently found out she is pregnant. I believe she is about 2 months or so pregant. My gf cheated on my in December with her ex bf….I am scared she is still seeing him because he may possibly be the father, if they place the pregnancy conception back to the end of December. Over the past week my gf has became very distance, we haven’t had sex for a week. She treats me bad. Last Thursday she was gone all day up there where she is from, she came home and told me she felt fine. I came home from work and she said she was sick. I also noticed strange stains in her underwear (like they had been soaked) She cheated on me before badly and I wouldn’t put it past her again. I wonder if she is keeping her ex in the picture because he may be the father? Help!!! Thanks in advance for your opinion
She has lied to me before many times. I have even recently been using some "unconventional" methods to try to find out the truth. I have been placing a tape recorder in her car and using a program on my PC to log her activity. The worst thing was when her 7 year old nephew said she was talking to her ex. I don’t know how a kid could possibly come up with this….unless he did hear or see something. Despite all she has done to me in the past I do love her, I kinda feel like she is using me for a place to live and she is gonna keep lying to me until I blow up. She even acts like she doesn’t care about us at all anymore. I just wish she would tell me if she is seeing him so I won’t end up catching a disease. She told me in an argument the other day that "she doesn’t need me" This is a girl that is supposed to be having my baby….*sigh*
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My ex-girlfriend (25) and I (24) have been through a lot. She had 2 miscarriages and a still birth and all by me (never been preg by anyone else). I haven’t been there for her as much as she needed me to be due to my lack of maturity at the time and also now that I live 2 and 1/2 hours from her. I drove up to see her every weekend and just got my schedule changed so I’m off 4 days a week to make it to her appt’s and be there for her and the baby through the pregnancy. This past Aug she said she didn’t want to be with me anymore but that she still loved me. I asked her if we could try to work it out and after lots of convincing she she said we could try but it was real bumpy.
We were still sleeping together on occasion and she ended up pregnant in Oct. Needless to say because of the history, we were both nervous. Everything was going decent at this point but she was still saying that she doesn’t need to be with me just because she’s having my baby. She is also active duty military and found out right b4 christmas that she got orders 1000 miles away from me (which she had the choice to accept or deny and I know since I was in also). But she says she hates it so much where she is that she is going to leave. When she got the news she said she wanted to talk about it as a family, but yet she was already making decisions for the family, so what was left to talk about? Then when I didn’t tell her right away that I would be willing to go she automatically flipped it on me and said I’m being selfish and not thinking about the baby. I have a decent job and there’s no telling if I would be able to get a job right away where she is going and she’s being unreasonable and uncompromising.
Because of the arguing and her stubborness, I didn’t see her on christmas (that and I had to work the next day) and I worked new year’s eve and new year’s day. I called her new year’s eve and told her I would be willing to go so we could be a family and have a fresh start and that I’ll just start looking for jobs now. I even thought about going back active duty even though I hated being in the military. Pretty much I told her that I would make whatever sacrifice I had to, to be with her and my child. She started screaming at me, "no it’s too late. You had your chance, and now me and the baby are leaving and I don’t want nothing to do with you." We spoke maybe 2 times since then and she doesn’t even want me around to go to appt’s with her. She say’s she doesn’t love me anymore and she’s not even attracted to me now, but she supposedly doesn’t hate me. And if she stays with me our child is going to see how miserable I make her and she doesn’t want negativity around the baby. We haven’t seen each other since the end of Nov and I haven’t spoke to her in a week now and even the last time I called her she answered the phone saying "what!". She doesn’t even want to give the baby my last name anymore and doesn’t care how much I won’t be able to see my child.
What is going through her head right now? Will she ever come around? I love this girl and I really want to be a father to my child. But with her being 1000 miles away, how can I be? And she knows this. I know I made mistakes in our relationship but I never even cheated on her. Just had female friends, which didn’t sit well with her. What can or what should I do? Does she really want to be a single parent like she’s saying? Why shut me out when I want to be there?
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