I found out that my husband has been calling other females and texting a lot. I suspected that he may be having affair. We talked about it he said that they are just friends. I am still hung up on him hiding it from me. Why would he hide it if they were only friends?. Now I keep checking the phone bills only to find that this has been going on for a few months but he never once mentioned her. How can I move past this?



Related Information:

We met on myspace roughly 2 1/2 years ago on the school forum. When we’d decided to meet up and go to a movie, it was really easy to talk to him about nothing, our conversation flowed over a million topics (which is REALLY rare, my closest friend besides him has trouble getting me to talk)
The day after we met, he asked me out and I accepted. For 3 months everything felt fantastic, then one day I woke up and was like…this isn’t right, this isn’t going to work. I broke up with him after figuring out why that feeling came so suddenly. (I’m really not a big fan of commitment, my parents are a fine example of jumping into a commitment too fast)
We didn’t talk for a few months; he’s the kind of guy that attaches and doesn’t let go so I think I broke his heart then. I sent him a message asking how things were going. After a bit we were back to talking like before. For the next two years, I’d thought that we were just friends, that he was over his crush. I’ve always been protective of him, but I figured it was because I didn’t want his easily-hurt feelings messed with. But awhile back he told me that he wasn’t over me, he couldn’t handle me dating, breaking up, and then crying to him that there was nobody out there for me. So he cut off contact again. The next few days were…I didn’t bother getting out of bed, with the exception of using the bathroom. After that, I thought that I was okay. I tried to off myself once, but for another reason. My mom and my friends noticed the difference that I didn’t see, though…I didn’t talk as much, I rarely laughed and if I did it sounded forced.
I didn’t realize how beat up I was over the whole thing until one day I wanted to go sort issues out with someone who showed serious stalker-like tendencies. I had a fight with my mom, and she was like "well maybe he’s just jealous and overprotective" and I said that that seemed to be a problem I had with lots of my guy friends and I started crying a little bit. My brother said in a very rude way "Why the heck are you crying? It’s because your a little Wh*** that attracts perverts right" and I said ‘No, it’s because I miss him you a**hole’ and I just absolutely broke down. That night, he called. When my mom told him how messed up I’d been, he drove over at 1AM on a school night to come comfort me because I’d started crying uncontrollably when I heard his voice on the other line.
We sat in his car for 3 hours just talking. And I’d ended up falling asleep with my head in his lap after he put his jacket over me because I was shivering. I realized that maybe I do have deeper feelings for him…
Now here’s the drama…one day I came over, and I don’t know what happened, I kissed him. And it escalated. He stopped me and said ‘I can’t do this, I have a girlfriend’. I was…devastated. Not only because he’d rejected me, but also because I hadn’t known that he had a girlfriend, and I basically just totally skewered their relationship. The guilt was so great that I’d tried to choke myself while he was downstairs. He pulled the hairties off my neck and held me until I stopped crying. We’ve still gotten closer since then though. He broke up with his ex, and now he’s talking to me about our futures…and how he hopes that they could possibly be combined. I don’t think I deserve him, and I’m horribly afraid to commit to something like that. I’m just so confused…
And I’m just…afraid to hurt him again. He’s the best person someone could know. But my commitment issues are just absolutely out of control, and I’ve been scared of getting into relationships lately. Also; some days he’s attractive to me and others I just see him as my best friend. It’s making me mad, because it’s even more proof that I don’t deserve him.
The summary is:

He liked me, I liked him. I stopped liking him, I dumped him. We didn’t talk for awhile, then we started again. For awhile I thought things were awesome, then he said he was jealous and stopped talking again. I got really down, and he came and made me feel better. The whole thing made me think that maybe I do have feelings for him, my emotions are just crazy around him. I kissed him not knowing he had a girlfriend and he proved how decent he was by stopping me. We’re closer then ever before, but sometimes he’s the guy I’m n love with, other times he’s just my best friend.

And I need to add that when I’m laying next to him on the couch justlounging, I feel so at peace it’s amazing…

Basically I’m asking for advice about what to do, if I should act on it or if I’ll just end up hurting him again..



Related Information:

so me and my boyfriend have been together for almost 2 months and we really love each other but i always think that hes cheating on me with his ex girlfriend. they were toghther for a year and then they broke up. they talk on instant messaging sometimes. and he says that they are just friends and stuff but i dont know i really do love him and i dont want to break up with him and i want to ask him but im not sure. what should i do ??? thanks!!



Related Information:

me and my bf broke up 3 months ago because it got too complicated to stay together. my dad didnt want me dating until i finished my degree (next year) and he was moving to a new city. anyways, we broke up because it was the best thing to do at the time and we decided that if we had the same feelings for each other in a year, that we will get back together, but for now we are just friends

i miss him so much and really want to be with him and i really hope that he still wants to be with me, but we went through alot with my dad and i worry that over time he might decide its not worth getting back together…

however, he still talks to me several times a week and even flirts sometimes. also, he came to town for my bday and has hung out with me a few times, invited me to his grad…is it possible that he still has feelings for me? if all he wanted was a friendship he wouldn’t act this way right?

do u think it will be possible for us to get back together next yr?
btw i am 22

and i know u will comment on the fact that my dad shouldn’t control my relationship but i live at home and he is very strict and i cant change that…
following his wishes is better than going against them, especially if we want to have a future together…
oh and we dated for a year



Related Information:

its a long read, and i am sorry, but please, help me. if you need any more details that will help you give me a better answer, please ask me, i need all the advice i can get. okay, so first to describe my girl. she’s independent, smart, and has some commitment issues (not talking about cheating or anything, but sticking with someone) she has been hurt before about 2 years ago, and is now skeptical of letting me in again.
heres the situation: me and my girlfriend have been dating for almost 4 months. we have had little to no disagreements, and always got along well. about a month into the relationship, she was scared of it getting too serious, and she broke it off. i didn’t give up because i really care for her and love what we had together. about a week later, she figured her stuff out, and we got back together. everything has been fine since about 3 weeks ago. she told me that she was not ready for a serious relationship, and she was telling the truth. (not like she used it as an excuse to break up, she still had MUCH feelings for me. ) she said she needed some time to think about things and try to let herself know that she is ready for this kind of realtionship. she also said, that we need to be more casual for a while, so we can base our realtionship upon a good friendship. ive put up with the emotional roller coaster for these 3 weeks. we occasionally kissed, and a weve hung out a few times. we still regularly saw each other at school, just not as much. and now, another wrench has been thrown in the picture. about 1.1/2 months ago, i had some friends over at my house, along with a neighbor and her friend. now this neighbor is a "pretend slut". she gets with guys, and has a different bf like all the time, but she never will actually go anywhere with a guy besides kissing them. (but we are just friends). we all went swimming in the saltwater close to my house, so we came in and took showers to wash off the salt after we finished swimming. while i was in the shower, my this girl opened the door, and came in. she had her bathing suit on, and she decided to get into the shower. her friend followed, and (her friend) proceeded to take her clothes all the way off. i did not touch them at all, nor did i let them touch me. i simply went with it, and didn’t say much about it after. i finished, and got them out of the room and got dressed, (end of story) well now, as of yesterday, my girl found out about this whole shower thing from some kid who she’s never met xcept over facebook. now, she has lost a lot if not all trust in me, and dosnt know if she can forgive me. (thats what she told me)
i LOVE her, but not the common high-school meaning of love thrown around so easily nowadays. but i DO know i truly love this girl, because if i didn’t, i wouldn’t have been patient with her in the first place and i wouldn’t have let her back the first, and the second time she hurt me. i still think, deep down she loves me too, because right before she found this information out, she came up to me at school and said "i DO love you, i REALLY do. i just want some time alone so i can figure things out, just give me a few more weeks." she said that <—., which makes me think she deep down does STILL love me. even after this whole shower thing. something i dont understand, is how i have given her my love and shown my love through the many chances i have given her to think her stuff through, and how much i have forgiven her for breaking up with me in the beginning, and also just recently like 3 weeks ago, yet she wont give me JUST 1 chance to start fresh and let me back in.

my questions are:

how do i gain her trust back?
once that happens, how do i get her to give me a second chance?
how do i fix the rest of it?
i think that if we can work through this, it will make our relationship MUCH MUCH stronger.


Related Information: