Me and my ex have been broken up since the 23rd of January.He hasnt spoke to me,called or contacted me.Its as if he has forgotten me completely.I had made a mistake begging for him back,and making myself feel less than i am.That only made me feel worse.You cant force someone to love you.Two days after the breakup i asked him if he still loved me,he said no he didnt,which really hurt,because how can u possibly forget someone soo quickly.I mean we spent 9 full months together doing everything.He was my best friend.He was my first true love,which i heard takes alot of time to get over.I had made some mistakes of my own.I have disrespected him several times,made him feel as if he had to choose between me and his family,distracted him from God.this all happened when i was selfish and too confident in the middle of the relationship.My sister had told me If he really loved you he would have pushed and never gave up on the relationship no matter what.She is now married to a man that she says puts up with everything she says and does,because he loves her.His reasons to why he broke up with me were You never changed,we werent going anywhere,and i feel that God wants me to be single,and focus on him.I respect that,but i mean seriously i do not deserve this hurt,and do not believe it.His ex-girlfriend before me he had visited her in Ohio before we were dating last last christmas.It was a long distance relationship,he had payed 200 dollars plus the christmas gifts.when he arrived she had broke up with him,and had flirted and talked to one of his best friends.He had missed her from what he told me,but that is absolutely ridicolous.5 months into that relationship by phone and email and he still spoke to her,and 9 months with me and no contact whatsoever.im confused.I mean yeah i gave him emotional hurt i didnt see,but i still holded on to him and kept going strong.i had lost my dog and i begged him when he could to pay half of my new one and i would pay half.All i could do was apologize and make him see that i did not want his money or materials soo i returned them back to him.all i wanted was his support and love.from s guys perspective,do u know if he will come back,and is hiding his feelings right now?or should i just move on and let it go?why do you think he discontinued talking to me?Is he thinking bad things about me that he didnt see and telling everyone?It hurts to feel like you are the bad person.
Thank you soo much everyone for your answers.it helped.one more thing is age a problem.i mean im 17 and hes 19.im in high school hes out.i see love as a risk you have to fight for.love is not harmful nor excusable.i still do love him and miss him alot.it sucks when memories come at you like knife in your brain.its almost march when we first started talking.its almost april 17 when we first met:(.this couple of months are going to be like hell.he had another excuse that he doesnt have time to be in a relationship.in my opinion there is time for everything.its dedication,determination,sacrifice,and love what we need.i wonder how he is doing.i wonder if he still loves me even though he said he didnt.i wonder if he cares.I never knew i could fall in love with him.we were completely different.
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My nephews 20 year old father committed suicide just 5 hours ago. He felt so alone and hopeless that he hung himself in his aunts basement. Now i didn’t hate him but because of some words we had had between us i had said and done some mean things to him since than, such as making him sit outside to visit his son because i was angry with him and didn’t want him in my house, or making him feel unwelcome when i did let him stay with me because he had no place else to stay. But i did still care about him i was just angry and this was my petty way of showing it i guess.This was awhile back and me and him haven’t even spoken since last christmas where we were very civil to each other because i was over being angry by than. However now the guilt is overriding me i have cried so much my face is raw because he has had such a hard life he really did as a child he was abused, molested, bounced through foster home to foster home. And as an adult he has struggled with drugs, trouble, and mental illness, i just keep seeing him and imagining how alone he must have felt, and i feel i am one of the reasons he felt so unwanted and unloved in this world that he didn’t want to live in it anymore. I know that isn’t realistic with all the other stuff he has had happen to him but i just want to take it all back and tell him how sorry i am and that he is cared about and its too late and its killing me.He was only 20 years old and he felt so unwanted and hopeless that he endured the suffering of hanging for 45 minutes before he was found, i cant get that image out of my head it will haunt me forever. How do i at least let go of enough of the guilt that i can move on enough to cope? I am a single mom of four kids and i have really not been all that much good to them since i heard the news cuz i cant stop crying for more than 5 minutes at a time. I think i have post partum on top of this and i’m just a real mess right now as you can probably tell. I wish i could just go back 5 hours and call him and tell him he’s not alone, i know what it feels like to feel all alone and i wish i hadn’t let him feel that way
Jessi thank you we did try so much to help him when he first entered our family but it seemed like he always fell back down. I guess he had just been damaged too much by the time he got to us. There were some pretty bad things done that led me to act the way i did to him but now that he’s gone it just feels insignificant and petty and although i know the few things i did that happened almost 2 years ago were probably the last thing on his mind as i said im a single mom of 4 so i know what its like to feel so alone and hopeless and i just wish i hadn’t done anything to make him feel that way if i did. i wish i could apologize and tell him he was still loved and cared for regardless of what he had done wrong. It probably wouldn’t have changed the outcome with everything he has been through but it would have eased my soul a little. The guilt is a big burden an i will never let my babies go to bed without telling them how much i love ever again. thank you for your kind words and prayers
Josh wherever you are i hope you are no longer hurting and are finally at peace like you could never be here on earth. Forgive me if i ever did or said anything to make you feel unloved or unwanted because you were loved and wanted and you will be missed more than you would have believed. I wish someone would have helped you when you were little before you had to go through what you did than maybe things would have been different and my nephew would still have his daddy. I miss you i hope your suffering has ended finally, i’m so sorry we couldn’t give you whatever it was you needed 
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Me and my ex have been broken up since the 23rd of January.He hasnt spoke to me,called or contacted me.Its as if he has forgotten me completely.I had made a mistake begging for him back,and making myself feel less than i am.That only made me feel worse.You cant force someone to love you.Two days after the breakup i asked him if he still loved me,he said no he didnt,which really hurt,because how can u possibly forget someone soo quickly.I mean we spent 9 full months together doing everything.He was my best friend.He was my first true love,which i heard takes alot of time to get over.I had made some mistakes of my own.I have disrespected him several times,made him feel as if he had to choose between me and his family,distracted him from God.this all happened when i was selfish and too confident in the middle of the relationship.My sister had told me If he really loved you he would have pushed and never gave up on the relationship no matter what.She is now married to a man that she says puts up with everything she says and does,because he loves her.His reasons to why he broke up with me were You never changed,we werent going anywhere,and i feel that God wants me to be single,and focus on him.I respect that,but i mean seriously i do not deserve this hurt,and do not believe it.His ex-girlfriend before me he had visited her in Ohio before we were dating last last christmas.It was a long distance relationship,he had payed 200 dollars plus the christmas gifts.when he arrived she had broke up with him,and had flirted and talked to one of his best friends.He had missed her from what he told me,but that is absolutely ridicolous.5 months into that relationship by phone and email and he still spoke to her,and 9 months with me and no contact whatsoever.im confused.I mean yeah i gave him emotional hurt i didnt see,but i still holded on to him and kept going strong.i had lost my dog and i begged him when he could to pay half of my new one and i would pay half.All i could do was apologize and make him see that i did not want his money or materials soo i returned them back to him.all i wanted was his support and love.from s guys perspective,do u know if he will come back,and is hiding his feelings right now?or should i just move on and let it go?why do you think he discontinued talking to me?Is he thinking bad things about me that he didnt see and telling everyone?It hurts to feel like you are the bad person.
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We were ok, if not totally doting in recent years, spent quality time and went away on holidays short trips. My company struggled and my income dropped. I was too proud to involve her, later scared to. about my debts…you pay one to the detriment of another, he who shouts louder usually got sorted 1st. Result being in recent years, about 6, she has had to pay for everything, which she did willingly, but the drip drip conversations with our divorced and separated friends moaning about their Exes and asking if i did this why did she do that, combined with my own failings to deal effectively with my debts and her finding out about them in stages. and my failure to actually say the words "I LOVE YOU" finally came to a head last Christmas. We have tried to sort things out. We went to some sort of councilling at the Church, I cried, then asked why I was crying as she was the one that was hurt….seemed a stupid question to me. I ll leave it there, but as you would expect, there are a lot of other points to raise. What I would like answered is How do I encourage her to love me again. Particularly as within 3 weeks of my sleeping in a local Bedsit she was seeing another guy moved all my clothes out of our wardrobes his clothes haninging in their place and sharing by bed with her, also parking his black Sports car in my garage.
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