This one is complicated I’ll try and clarify the best I can.
I was dating this guy (Jake) and things were going great. Then my ex (Sam) started calling and begging me back and of course like most naive young girls I took him back. Naturally about a month later I found out I was pregnant. Go figure.
The doctor determined a certain due date and according to that due date it would mean paternity was in favor of Sam. Then I had a bad episode and had to go to the hospital about a week and a half ago and it’s looking more and more like I am about a month farther along than previously estimated which coincidentally matches my last period. This would mean paternity was in favor of Jake. I had a feeling from the get go that it probably is Jake’s. Sam and I slept together unprotected for 3 1/2 years and I never got pregnant.
Jake is back with his ex (who he left right before me). When I left him he was devastated and badly wanted me to come back. He talked many times (before our breakup) of having a family in the future and how bad he someday wanted a son (and of course the baby is a boy). I’ve had many people tell me he is unhappy with her. There is now a really good chance this baby is his. This is my question. By the latest ultrasound I had I’m about 37 weeks meaning baby could come at any time. Even though it is this late I did just find this out and I feel the right thing to do is to tell him. I know how much family means to him especially a son. But I don’t want to tell him and be wrong. However chances are looking far more in his favor (like 75%) and I wouldn’t want him to be angry or hurt that I didn’t tell him. The only problem is I don’t want to cause problems with him and his girlfriend because I know they’re not real steady and have problems. I do still have those strong lingering feelings especially now that it looks like he is the father BUT I do want him to be happy. I know that most men would want to know even if it’s just a chance and I think he has that right. What would you do?
I am getting a paternity test done anyway but I wouldn’t want him upset that I didn’t share this with him before hand. I know he’s the kind of guy who would step up to the plate but as I said I’d just rather him be happy. What do you think is the right thing to do?
Additional Details
Silly me forgot to mention. Both Sam and Jake know that I’m pregnant. From the time I found out I was pregnant until I was 4 months I was still with Sam and now am single focusing on the baby. Up until I went to the hospital paternity was thought to be Sam’s. Now it looks like paternity lies with Jake. Help please. Guys especially. Should I tell Jake now that there is even a chance paternity is his?
