ending a bad relationshipBad Relationships

If you are in a bad relationship self help techniques may not work unless you seek the right type of advice. If you walk into any bookstore you will see shelves of books written on relationships. They will cover all topics and be written by men and women; some of whom will have very impressive credentials.

But how do you know they will work? How do you know that these same writers are themselves happily involved with someone? Quite frankly I believe you have to be in a great relationship before you can help other people with theirs. After all you don’t go to a nun for sex help do you? So why ask a single person how a partnership should work?

You need to use self help guides like the M3 System i.e. a created by a real person, who is very happily married and writes to help real people just like you; with similar relationship problems. You want someone who cares whether you and your partner make it or not. Someone who will answer your emails should you wish to ask them a personal question because just sometimes the books don’t always cover everything.

Any relationship can be improved. There is no such thing as a ‘perfect one’ just as no human being is perfect. But you can have a great relationship with your existing partner. They are probably Mr or Ms right for you, just you have hit a couple of hurdles you need some help in getting over.

Self help marriage counseling may be an answer for those of us that don’t want to sit down with a stranger; to discuss the intimate details of our relationship. But unless you know where to start and what to look for, you probably aren’t going to achieve much more than another argument. The problem is that when you are involved in the situation you often can’t see things from the other person’s perspective. It is important that you learn as it takes two to tango as the old saying goes.

You will have to deal with painful issues and discussing these will take patience and practice. For example, sex may be causing an issue between you but it is often very difficult to discuss making love. Both of you may feel embarrassed or ashamed or annoyed that this subject is coming up again.

So before you dive into sorting out your relationship, make sure you have done some reading and thread carefully while you apply what you have learned. Take things slowly and don’t let your discussions turn into an argument. If things get heated, walk away and cool down. You cannot make the other person speak to you, so if they are not into a chat at that time, then leave it, and wait for a couple of days. Usually you will find that your partner is just as eager as you are to sort things out. Pick your moment before applying the relationship self help approach.

Learn more about the M3 System Here


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marriage prediction quiz
Are you ready for marriage quiz? If you want some light entertainment one evening why not do a marriage quiz together? These tests are designed to be a bit of fun but sometimes they can be used for other purposes. Some people will use them to sort out the problems in their relationship which is rather unrealistic unless both of you have taken a truth drug. For example, if you are both in a loving mood then you will score highly on these tests as you will both be open to the suggestions that your partner is wonderful. However if he is less than Romeo in your eyes or she resembles your mother in law more than the wife you married, you can get all the wrong results. For example, they can be used to check compatibility, although one could argue that it is a bit late checking that when you are already married!

So you have been warned, what can start as a game can quickly turn into an argument if you have underlying issues already. So if you two have been fighting a lot lately perhaps this is not the type of fun you should engage in. But that being said, they can be a useful way to open up a discussion particularly if you find it difficult to talk about your problems. You may find that the quiz opens up some doors to better communication between you. If you want to start talking about a difficult topic you might want to introduce a quiz as an idea for an activity that both of you can do together when the kids have gone to bed. Just be careful as these things can spiral out of control very quickly if either partner takes offence easily.

Where can you find these marriage quizzes? They regularly appear in magazines and are also available online. But if you are having problems in your relationship this is the not the way to resolve them. You need to get some help whether you try a relationship counseling service or some self help books and courses. If you are not sure where to start you could try the Magic Of Making Up which helps to develop proper communication between spouses and partners. Sometimes it can seem like men and women are from two different planets. They often want the same things but are not sure how to put this into words.

Every couple have days where they argue constantly and appear to have lost all love for one another. It is only when these days outnumber the good ones that you need to be concerned. A marriage quiz is meant as a bit of fun and we all need some fun and light entertainment in our lives particularly if we are going through stressful times. One of the best ways of keeping your relationship alive is to laugh together. Try renting an old funny movie or doing a quiz. Whatever works for you.

 

 


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He’s Torn Between Leaving And Staying:

How Do I Make Him Stay?

My boyfriend and I broke up less than two days ago. I love him more than anything in the world, but I made our relationship very difficult because of my emotional instabilities.

I will do anything to get him back.

I am going to counseling to deal with my issues (they apply to my life in general, not just to my relationship with him), I’m reading self-help books, and I’m giving him as much space and time as he needs. I’m not forcing him to come back, but I hope more than anything that he does.

There really is no one else for me, and I think that I can really make him happy once I become a better person. But I want to be a better person not just for him, but for myself, for everyone else I love.

How can I convince him to give me another chance? He loves me dearly, I know. He told m yesterday (he sought me out himself) that he’s miserable without me, but the thought of getting back together doesn’t make him happy either, because I hurt him so much. He hugged me for half a minute, kissed me very passionately, told me he loved me, and then said “I shouldn’t have done that.”

He’s torn between leaving and staying, and I just want him to stay, to just give me another chance to make him happy like he made me happy.

I’m leaving him completely alone so that he can make a decision on his own. I’m trying to exemplify the person I’m promising to be in the future by being supremely kind, understanding, and emotionally stable. I’m a determined person, and I really can change. Not just for his happiness, but for my own.

I even wrote a letter to him explaining how committed I am to making us work, how even if he chooses not to stay, I’ll find a way to repay him for the wonderful things he’s done to me, that I’ll love him forever (I haven’t sent it to him yet. Don’t know if I should).

But is there a way to convince him to stay, to give me a chance to make him happy? Am I doing the right thing now? I don’t want to push him, because I want him to be happy and secure in his decision. But can I convince him somehow without pushing him?

Oh and we’ve had some fantastically good times, too. We both know this. He’s just overwhelmed at the moment by the not-so-good ones. All I can think about are the happy times, and how I want to make them happen again.

Any advice for me?


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i’m 22 years old and am dating an amazing guy. i have never been this serious with anyone – we’re talking about marriage. but over the course of our relationship i have morphed into the bitchy girlfriend, and am constantly on his case about everything. i’m a very analytical person by nature, and don’t have the highest self-esteem, so i tend to take things personally, for example if he does not want to hang out, i automatically assume it was something that i did. he told me last night, after a fight, that he was miserable because i’m always yelling at him. i know the obvious thing would be to stop yelling, but it’s almost as if i can’t control it. i’m horribly embarassed about my behavior and just want to relax. i have a feeling, the way to fix it is to fix myself, but i’m not sure how to do that. i don’t know, maybe you guys have some advice, or know of some really good self help books out there, because i’m feeling a little crazy. i’m a very good natured person, i just freak on my man


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I’ve been separated from my husband for 3 months now. He doesn’t love me anymore and he refuses to work with me on our marriage. He refuses to go to counseling with me, whereas, I’ve been to counseling.
I even tried to read marriage self help books and got him to read but he said the book(s) make sense but it doesn’t apply to him because he doesn’t love me anymore and quits on our marriage.
I invited him to where I was living and he stayed with me and my son for 3 weeks before flying back home. He didn’t do anything to help improve our relationship while he came to visit. He keeps rejecting me over and over and constantly disrespects me. It’s frustating to save my marriage on my own.

I’ve been seeing another man while I was separated. We just hang out as friends and he knows about my situation and he’s okay with it. We have NOT been intimate but we have feelings and care deeply for each other. I was advised by my lawyer that if I’m going date while I’m still married, to not introduce my children to him and to keep my relationship "discreet".

Need your opinions.
This man I’m seeing happened by accident. It’s not like I was "looking" for someone on purpose.


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