After a painful divorce about 3 years ago, i spent the first 10 months as an emotional mess, and i was not ready to date at the time, nor did i have any ‘game’ or confidence at the time even if i wanted to. Right then i befriended a girl, a very attractive, professional, independant woman. We would go to movies and dinners regularly, just for fun, no romance or anything. Not even ANY innocent flirting ever. At the time i could come off as needy or just very ‘unsmooth’, but even though her friends would tell her unflattering things about me, even things that came across as creepy to them, she stood by me as a friend because she knew i just needed time to get on my feet and over the breakup.

Two years later now….i am totally over the split, i LOVE life, i have gotten myself into top shape, i got my game back, and i never have any problems getting dates or going out or attracting woman, and my confidence is at an alltime high. I’ve been loving the single life the last year and all the freedom and benefits it provides.

But that one friend is the one i have my eye on lately, and she is the only one i can’t seem to get. Perhaps it is because we are friends, and she knew me as the needy emotional mess from way earlier, even though i am a completly different person now. Don’t have a second chance to change a first impression i guess, because it would be totally different if i met her today.

We still go out maybe every couple of weeks or so for sushi or a movie, but last week i gently hinted to her that i think she is very attractive, and now we do little ‘flirty’ things like touch each others hands, or resting my fingers on her knee when we sit at a bar, but it is just innocent and more playful than anything romantic. She once gently removed my hand from her hip at one point, but that didnt spoil the mood or anything, but it did confuse me, because about 10 minutes after she hinted she would love to come on my business trip with me to chicago for fun next week. But i dont think she means for it to be any more than that. i dont want to read anything into it.

How can i gently try to push it just a step further without having it ruin the friendship potentially. She knows that i am popular with women, and have been out on many dates over the last year. Maybe she thinks i am a player, but I would like her to somehow know that she is not like all the others to me. There is a much more genuine connection for me with her, and i would be willing to be much more serious for her.

So how to build a bridge from good friend to girlfriend?

Technorati Tags: 10 months, 3 years, attracting woman, business trip, confidence, emotional mess, Fingers, first impression, freedom, Friends, game, independant woman, love life, painful divorce, romance, second chance, shape, single life, sushi

I have a question, and please respond seriously, no jokes please.

I am a 16 year old christian boy. I attend religious education classes, and for my entire life I have beleived in God.
Recently however, I have begun to… lose faith in him. Im not sure how to word it.

I’ve been living with a father who hates me (it is a looooong story, but beleive me when I say it :\) and ontop of that, he is disabled. My family has virtually NO money, and my poor mother has such a hard time running the house without a husband that can help her.
Not only that, but last year, I met the girl of my dreams. I know I’m young and everything…but she was perfect for me. You have no idea. It was almost a fairy tale come true.We were perfect for eachother… and All i wanted in life was to make her happy… I prayed to god every night for her to be safe and happy, and for the most part, she was.
The only exception to my "fairy tale" is that she lives 6000 miles away… which was a big bummer, but I had learned to deal with it.

But now, explaining my current situation, my family is still in the same shape it was in. Extremely mean father who makes me feel like a failure, no money, small house, work piling up…
But as for the girl in my life… recently, she just…disappeared. She’s been gone for so long with no contact… and I cant get a hold of her….

My life has been empty without her… and I cant do anything about it…

Then i started thinking about where god was… I do NOT expect god to wave a magic wand and make my life better…but I still pray to him every night…begging for Justine to come back… and she doesnt…. I beg of him to help my family in some way… and it just gets worse…

I KNOW god cant magically make my life better…but how come he lets these things happen… how can he just sit by, and watch people like me’s lives fall appart…
Its times like this that I think about the Holocaust, and all the poor starving people in Africa… and it leads me to lose even more faith…

Even the other day on the internet, I saw a picture of a pile of dead bodies. The bodies were all of starved, skeletal looking african people. There was a caption under the picture that said
"God?… I dont see him, maybe he’s under the bodies"…. and it just hit me deep down…

I’m afraid that I’m losing hope in god… and theres nothing I can do about it….

Technorati Tags: big bummer, current situation, dreams, eachother, failure, fairy tale, faith, girl in my life, girl of my dreams, god, god cant, hard time, holocaust, jokes, justine, magic wand, money, Money 97, ontop, poor mother, religious education classes, shape, starving people in africa

OF course, I’ve been thinking about this all my life. But for some reason, it’s been becoming more and more intense. I see certain things in front of my face, like shadows, however, they aren’t the type that you’d think of, they disappear, though I am well aware that they were JUST by me.

I, for some reason, am able to do certain things with elements, like air, sometimes water, definitely fire, but rarely earth. wood and aether have not been used, except when I put something down, (keep in mind that I’m alone in the house,) look away, decide to use it, look at the area where I intended to use it, and there it is, and it leaves behind a sort of wierd feeling that makes me dizzy when I look at it.

Whenever I want something to happen, I don’t even have to do anything about it, it just happens. Like when I get really emotional and begin to think about someone who I hate, next thing I know, they are either sick, hit by a car, or essentially dead.

When it comes to outdoors, I’ve never had a problem with them, until I could command the wind to stop when I wanted it to, and go when I wanted it to as well. This does NOT include tornadoes…

Usually, whenever I have these problems, I look up other people who have the same issues, but no one ever seems to have these issues like me.

And then, once I tried to make up my own spell, and it actually worked!! I really got rid of someone… forever, (not dead, they just moved all the way to South Carolina.)

And for some reason, I’ve been having these strange dreams about standing over a certain shape, reciting this spell in another language, (On pito sen dep on kishi zampa iro nata!), the shape begins glowing, and then I wake up!

I am well aware tht I’m not crazy, because I’m only 13, but I don’t believe in super heroes, hogwarts or anything like that, I’m just starting to get really creeped out by this stuff because it’s been happening more and more often! Please tell me what this is if you know, or your ideas…

I NEED ANSWERS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Alright, I must admit that last sentence was pretty crazy what with the screaming and all, but I really do need answers though.

Technorati Tags: 101, earth, elements, hogwarts, iro, leaves, magic, shape, south carolina, strange dreams, super heroes, tornadoes

Technorati Tags: 3rd child, shape

The guy i was / we were in love and were gonna marry eachother when both of us turned 18. we had little fights and argued over the little things but loved eachother so much. he decided to take a break for 2 months so he could concentrate on getting back into shape for summer. we agreed to get back after 2 months were up. now i’m afraid i lost him. its been 2 days since we agreed to and no phone calls or any contact of any sort. now i’m afraid hes in love with another girl because he said he’s interested in her and doesn’t wanna get back. it hurt so much coming from the only person i truly loved w/ my heart and trusted and came to. i miss him so much and want him back. but then 2 of my friends like me and wanna go out w/ me and every1 said i should go for the 1st guy but i don’t know what to do. i feel so empty and wanna give up on everything. i lost more confidence in myself than i already did. plus this 1 guy won’t get off my ass or take the hint im not interested in him. what do i do

Technorati Tags: confidence, Dating, eachother, getting back into shape, heart, hes, Lost, love, phone calls, shape

I have my first concert in less than two weeks and I am recovering from a sinus infection which has left my throat and my lungs in terrible condition. I am going back to the doctor tomorrow to make sure nothing else has come of my illness, but in the meantime, I need to do everything possible to make sure my voice will be in tip-top shape in no time. If you have any ideas, please help. Thanks!

Technorati Tags: doctor tomorrow, lungs, shape, Singing Voice, sinus infection

every year i try to get back in shape and every year i fall back because i’m not motivated. what are good ways to stay motivated to eat well and get back in shape.

Technorati Tags: Fall 98, shape

I am a 44 year old male. A few years back, I used anabolic steroids along with my gym routine. Unfortunately I have now developed man boobs on top of my muscular chest. How can I get rid of them without going down the drastic route of surgery? I’m in good shape and healthy but no amount of exercise will shift them!

Technorati Tags: anabolic steroids, exercise, good shape, gym routine, M 105, man boobs, muscular chest, shape

I’m 27 and my boyfriend just asked to marry me and I want to say no- not because I don’t love him. but because after listening to all my guys friend and brothers deal with their marriage and relationship, I’m convinced that women get SCREWED IN MARRIAGE.

Let me just say I’m not a man basher- I love men- the world would be boring without them. I’m independent- though I like when a guy does something for me without expectation and thus show my appreciation. I have a good job, take personal development classes, keep in good shape, and love to travel and do it often. I’m just afraid if I GET MARRIED I WILL LOSE MYSELF.

As women we are taught to grow up, get educated,get a career, get married, and maybe have children. Men get mad if we make more than them. If we get married, we are constantly told we forced him to settle down despite the man is the one, more often then not, who proposed. We then have children, which takes a toll on our bodies making us less attractive. Now strapped with most of the child-rearing duties and a full time job outside the home (with the economy it is to me expected that both work so that the family can survive) we have no time to get back to pre baby status. And if we try to it costs money (nails, new clothes, hair, makeup) we are then called golddiggers. After making money, raising the couples children, doing most of the domestic chores, men then complain that the wife will not have sex due to tiredness and they wonder why? We can not ask for help because it would be nagging. They don’t listen if we did approach them with a problem anyway. We give them their guy time to get away from the house despite being saddled with most of the domestic obligations ourselves. They put their friends first and we put our families first. They constantly complain about THE WIFE and then expect their wives to stroke their egos Men then use that time to cheat claiming that we became boring, no sex, or bad sex. I’m sorry, but a women with children, chores, and a fulltime job does not have time to get away to maintain herself ie girls night, waxing,take a class, read a good book or anything to she used to do that made the women interesting to the man to begin with. In divorce men complain that they get half their stuff taken- YA SO DO WE. ( I have a substantial saving pot, no debtat all, and two incoming producing rentals that I do not want to lose.) They complain that they lose the children when it has been my experience most of my divorce female friends say that their ex expected them to take the children because they don’t want to hassle with raising them. Anybody with children know that matter how much child support they get it is never equal to half the cost of raising a child. Alimony- I do not believe in unless you can prove without a shadow of a double that the women had to give up her career for somebody to stay home and raise the child -daycare is equivalent to a months pay nowadays making it pointless to have someone else f-up your kids when you can do it the right way by staying home.- In the end the man can go and start a new family forgetting about his old one and a women is looked down upon in the dating world for having children.

What should I do?

Technorati Tags: Bad Sex, Career, child rearing, children chores, clothes, couples, domestic chores, economy, egos, expectation, full time job, fulltime job, golddiggers, good job, good shape, guy time, Independent, job, makeup, Man Love, marriage, nails, personal development classes, relationship, shape, tiredness, Women Marriage

Some think that all it takes is to keep yourself in shape, cook, clean and cater to his every whim. To me that’s not a wife, it’s an indentured servant?

Technorati Tags: indentured servant, Perfect Wife, Servant, shape, whim

I have an older appaloosa, and i’m looking to get him back into basic riding shape. He has been out of work for several years. What would be the best way to get him going again, without hurting or stressing him? I’m guessing I should probably start with some kind of ground work, and then riding?

Technorati Tags: appaloosa, Back In Shape, ground work, shape

A guy that I have been seeing and who is becoming more and more serious just saw his ex-girlfriend. They are now friends and that does not bother me. What does bother me is that last night he went on a motorcycle ride with her. She wants him back. He dumped her. I just thought they were going to hang out and talk which is what I do with my guy friends. I am not sitting on their laps or doing anything intimate. I have sought advice from a few friends so far and am getting mixed reviews. I have no problem with him having her as a friend, but this motorcycle-riding just has me bent out of shape. I am even considering just breaking it off for good. I would like some advice and opinions please. Thanks!

Technorati Tags: amp, ex girlfriend, guy friends, laps, motorcycle ride, shape, Taking A Ride

My bf and I have been together over 4 years now, we have discuss marriage often, and agree we will definitley get married. We have ring shopped, and picked out the rings, he just has to save a little longer and buy it. We talked about the who, what, when, where, and how much about our wedding. It’s dead set we’re getting married, we just haven’t actually decided when, but probably in 2 more years (a yr after I finish college). The thing is, is that we are not "officially" engaged yet, but I found the perfect wedding dress and it’s at an amazing price! (0)!!! I wasn’t even seriously looking, and there is was sitting on the rack all perfect screaming out BUY ME!!! It’s exactly what I want. So, do I buy it? Will it be a psycho move to plan and buy for a wedding and he hasn’t even asked yet? And my big question, should I tell him or just store it and surprise him with it later? (he’s be thrilled to save $ from the budget, and learn how much I saved). What should I do?
I’m going to marry him, we’re going to be together for the rest of our lives, so I think I can handle the next 2 years….

Our wedding will be on the beach, and I have always and will always want that. I hate churches (not to offend anyone, I just really hate going, and I’m not religious in the least) and I’m not paying a ton of money for a huge wedding. The beach wedding is us all the way, and we wouldn’t have it any other way.

The dress is a style that I don’t think will ever go out of style, it’s pretty classic. Even if it does, I love it. My taste in clothes has never really changed, I’ve always had a classic flair, especially when I get dressed up. I’m not trendy at all! I KNOW I’ll still love this dress.

I’ve been the same size and shape since I was a teenager, and I’m in my 30’s now. My mother is the same size and shape she had when she was a teenager, and she’s had 4 kids and is 50. So, that isn’t a problem. I’m happy with my size and shape. I’m sure it won’t change.
And it’s only 0! That doesn’t put a dent in my savings account now, and it certainly won’t matter in 2 years, so it doesn’t matter to me if I do happen to change my mind….I’m worried if I pass it up, I’ll regret it big time. I’m very very picky when it comes to clothes, so to find something so perfect and at such a great price confuses me! I don’t know if it’s crossing the line, or if I should just get it.

Being together in 2 years, changing my mind about the dress, it being in style in 2 years, and being the same size are non-issues…

Not wanting to let the dress get away, and not making him feel pressured is… How can I have both?
And it’s only 0! That doesn’t put a dent in my savings account now, and it certainly won’t matter in 2 years, so it doesn’t matter to me if I do happen to change my mind….I’m worried if I pass it up, I’ll regret it big time. I’m very very picky when it comes to clothes, so to find something so perfect and at such a great price confuses me! I don’t know if it’s crossing the line, or if I should just get it.

Being together in 2 years, changing my mind about the dress, it being in style in 2 years, and being the same size are non-issues…

Not wanting to let the dress get away, and not making him feel pressured is… How can I have both?
alright Just Deal, do you feel better about yourself now? Keep the insults to yourself, and don’t act like you know my man! You have no idea what he would say or think, so maybe YOU need to pull your head out of the clouds. If your gonna have attitude, don’t bother answering any of my questions. I don’t need to hear the opinion of an ignorant bi(ch anyway.
I wish I could rate some of you guys, I’ve gotten some really great answers, and some real $hitty answers.

Technorati Tags: beach wedding, bf, budget, churches, clothes, flair, marriage, money, psycho, quot, rest of our lives, shape, Smart, teenager, wedding dress

My wife left me on Friday, moving back home with her folks. (The same people who she claimed beat her and made her life a living hell!) However, when i asked her in front of her mother she denied it! WTF!?!?!?!? Was she lying? I really dont think so but, I just dont know why she would leave to go to THEM! Her father hates me anyways! She has said that he resents me for having the things that him and his wife didn’t have when they were Jenn’s and my age(26/28) I never felt like I was a member of her family in all of the 8.5 years that we were together and NOW I feel like SHE has sabotaged all of that! Her father is def. loving the fact that she left AND that she/he took both of OUR cars! I legally have rights to one of them but I am not going to shitty like them. It just goes to show how LOW/NO CLASS they are! I always knew that though! I am just so blown! I guess what I am asking for advice on is how long should I wait to go out and start having fun as far as hooking up with the ladies again? It has been almost 7 months since I have had sex(if you were interested) and I was stupidly faithful. I am in THE BEST shape of my life and I am only 28. Green eyes, brown hair, olive complex, 6′1, 180 Italian/Peruvian I think that I am a catch for any honey. They only problem is that I am married! I am catholic and it DOES mean something to me.

She left me after counseling didn’t work! The therapist dumped us because she wouldn’t get her own therapy; i have been seeking my own! (her excuse, she didn’t have per visit to save our marriage) it wasn’t/I am not important enough(my words,not hers) so after that i said there is no point in sharing a bed. she moved to the spare room and then moved out because she claims I told her to. That is her rational behind leaving and taking both cars. She thinks that we are just separated and that we are going to "work" things out! Well its been 5 days and she has made NO attempt to contact me in regards to counseling, talking, anything other than ebay took fees out of her bank account and that I intentionally STOLE the money! Not the case! I am so lonely and she knows how bad its been for me. Were I was emotionally I am not going to kill myself BUT i WAS in DARK DARK place and SHE DI DNT CARE!
that just tells me she never loved me at all! marriage is about honor and commitment and unity!

I want to be happy and I dont want to be alone! I am SO ALONE! I JUST WANT TO BE HELD! i know that it sounds gay(im not) but I havent had any affection for months! my favorite thing before sex use to be kissing and the last kiss that I got other than a dead fish grandma kiss was i would say at least before new years. I know that I did kiss her maybe a month or so ago in the car or somewhere but she didnt like it and she didnt respond well. we were arguing and i figured that we had to connect SOMEWAY! I am not going to pay for sex but I AM TIRED OF J@$#ing off . There is NO REASON( I feel that either she is lesbian now or she HAS to be cheating) i dont know its too late now i guess….

How long should I wait! I want love or atleast a warm touch of a woman’s hand. I miss the scent of her hair, the touch of her skin. I just miss WOMEN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

WTF??????

HOW LONG? I am serious!!!! I am not going to base my life decision on strangers advice, I am just looking for feedback. To base my decision off of. THANKS

Technorati Tags: 7 months, brown hair, cars, excuse, green eyes, having fun, honey, jenn, living hell, marriage, shape, spare room