lost my spouseHow often have you heard someone say I lost my spouse?  How did you feel when they said that?  Perhaps you are saying it yourself?   It is relatively easy to lose love.  Why?  Men and women are very different creatures and often they have problems communicating with each other.  Add to that the unrealistic expectations that Hollywood or TV productions nurture via their films and you can see why couples often split as soon as the going gets a little tough.

But the fact is that all relationships even the ones others consider to be successful will go through difficult patches. Ask any couple who have lasted the distance and they will tell you that it isn’t all moonlight and roses. You can be living with someone, married to them even and have kids together yet feel that you hate them with a passion you never knew you had.  You don’t really, well most people don’t!  Life has just got in the way and over time you two have forgotten that you need to nurture your love much as a plant needs watering to survive.

It is too easy to take someone else for granted and assume that they are happy with the way things are between you.  It is also easier to leave things be than to try and deal with any painful issues that may have developed between you. Sometimes there is an embarrassment factor as well. For example it is not uncommon for couples to start to experience sexual difficulties when they have been together for a while.  This could be something simple like one partner has a higher sex drive than the other or it could be a medical reason such as the menopause causing problems or the man having difficulties maintaining an erection.  Instead of dealing with these issues together, some couples let them come between then until such a time as the communication gap is so wide you believe you have lost love.

Other couples let their job, their kids or their friends take priority over their partners and this can cause anger and resentment. You should never let anyone not even your children come before your partner, at least not on a consistent basis.  Kids grow up and leave home, friends come and go but your partner is the one person you want to remain by your side forever. The key is to remind them of this fact on a regular basis.

The good news is that most relationship issues can be sorted out with a little bit of guidance. If you have already split up by the time you read this, don’t despair. It doesn’t mean you have to give up on your ex partner forever. You can get them back if you know the right way to achieve it.   So stop thinking I lost love and start thinking about all the ways and means at your disposal to rekindle love and passion.

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