I love my wife with all my heart. What can I do to make her fall in love with me again? Please help?

I have been missing many signals. I feel like I’m becoming an asshole to her. I can’t let this happen cause I don’t want to loose her. I want to make her feel special, but I’m not a very romantic guy, according to her. Please help me before it is too late. Don’t worry about offending me I’ll do anything . Thank you

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23 Responses to “I love my wife with all my heart. What can I do to make her fall in love with me again? Please help?”

  • chinadoll says:

    I think the best way that my husband and I have kept the love alive in our marriage- is through our weekly date night. EVERY Friday we set aside everything else and just spend a few hours alone. Take your wife on a date. Romance her. It doesn’t have to be expensive- we’re poor. Just have a picnic on your bed or fly a kite or take a walk or make dinner together. Just let her know that you are making time for JUST her and her alone. There’s nothing more romantic than that.

  • latina says:

    wow… that sucks ! whats good is that you want to change. start by letting her know your feelings and apologizing and asking HER and NOT US what she needs or wants out of the relationship before its too late !!

  • pathma cute says:

    hi…. if u ask me…. i think u should spend more time with her… go out more often and make her happy….

  • steve says:

    it sounds too me there is nothing wrong with you..many guys don’t even get this part, as least you did..if you are trying with so much effort, and she’s not givng back, it may be time to either seek counseling, or seperate

  • qweenofdenial says:

    look 4 the book the "love dare" that should help ps do some little things text her and tell her u love her

  • Adub says:

    Write her a long HANDWRITTEN letter. Tell her all the reasons you love her and write down some of your favorite memories of her. Follow it up with some hand-picked flowers. Stop being an ASS and don’t wait too long, if you feel like you are pushing her away, you probably are.

  • christina p. says:

    I love the fact that you are so honest and maybe you can do the same to her. Start by saying "I’m sorry, I love you, please forgive me". My husband is a bit shy with romantic gestures, but I always feel special when he looks @ me ans smiles, tells me how important I am to him, that he’d be lost without me, and the best thing a man can do for a woman? A candle lit dinner for 2. Even if it is from the freezer,

  • Mystery Woman says:

    Plan a romantic getaway for the two of you, and make it a surprise. Be spontaneous! Romance her in any way possible. Even if you cant afford anything big, you can still make it super romantic. This may sound cheesy.. take a day off work (without her knowing) make a romantic dinner, light candles, put some soft music on, let her know how you truely feel about her…. and maybe even propose to her again! This would definitely be something she’ll never forget!

  • agoodquestion says:

    Don’t push her, you may push her away. What was it that made her fall in love with you to begin with? If you can’t think of anything, try just being her friend for a while. Listen to her carefully during this time, she’ll tell you what she needs.

  • scribblerr21 says:

    its good that the first step your taking is to realize that you do want to become a better husband. Start by maybe cooking her a nice dinner, i wouldnt take her out b.c if you cook it shows way more of an effort. Also i believe that the number one thing in a relationship is communication. Ask her how things are going, make sure that you take the time every day to communicate with her. surprise her with little things like flowers or a nice note just because you love her. and sex is also a very important factor, make sure that you are satisfying her enough throughout the week. good luck

  • Cweesh says:

    why don’t you date her? or do some efforts like giving her a flower chocolate, or cook her favorite food, or something that will remind her that day when you are both in love.

    sing outside your house, bring a guitar or cassette player, sing her your theme song… or any song that you know you can win her heart again..

  • Kimmy says:

    When people first meet. It’s the romance in the relationship that makes it grow.
    Compliment your wife on the little things. Write her little notes leave on the bathroom mirror and places where she’ll find them .. Compromise a little more do things she likes to do even if you have to sit through a chick flick!

    Phone her early in the day and tell her not to cook dinner , you’re taking her out … it would be nice to have a dinner out at least once a week or carry in ….

    It’s the little things that mean so much

    Good luck

  • Katie Cake says:

    I hate to be cliche, but honestly sometimes that’s exactly what women want. Think about how it was in the very beginning, were there little things you used to do for her that maybe she appreciated more then she showed? Try massages, offering to help her with simple tasks like the dishes or laundry, go out to eat at a nice restaurant or one that has a lot of sentimental meaning (first date, etc.). Does she like flowers? Bring her one home every day of the next week or so, talk to her and let her know that you’re afraid the flame is being snuffed and you want to rekindle the love you have for each other. Or hey- if you guys have the time, plan a romantic vacation for the two of you. But most importantly, tell her you love her as often as you can, and make it clear you still care about her. If things don’t start clearing up, maybe read a book or two about it, or consider marital counseling.

  • Rev Rob says:

    You cannot change free will.
    Do you know all of her needs, desires, and ambitions?
    Do you meet, satisfy, and support them?

    Do romantic things…….ask her what she thinks that is?

  • Latina_Rica says:

    Hey, you don’t need to be romantic to show you care for her. If you respect her (meaning do not yell at her, do not offend her and do not hurt her feelings, etc) should be ok. Show her you are supportive with whatever she needs and wants in life. Accept her the way she is and see her as how you saw her the first time.

    go to a movie or a restaurant every friday, saturday go to places you both like.

    Every 3-4 months, go to other state, the hotsprings 30 miles away or a night in a hotel, what about a one week trip to Puerto Rico and the Caribbean (some exotic place she will discover, learn from it and never forget? (that would make you special))

    or if you don’t have the money, a night in an hotel with jacuzzi would do it :)

    I don’t know, use your imagination but just respect her and everything will fall in place. Treat her the way you want to be treated, be kind, that is all. And when you feel you want to be an ass**, leave the place and control yourself, breath.

    Take anger management class. Your brain should control your emotions and actions not viceversa.

    Hope that helps and wish you the best

  • ambitionceo says:

    Just do what you did in the beginning of your relationship, prior to marriage. Date her. Do the unexpected. Be patient. Compliment her. Its the little things in life that women tend to cherish. Adore her. You dont have tot do anything extravagant, just do the nice things consistently. (Ie Rub her feet, kiss her on the back of her neck when she’s in the kitchen, go to the park with her, have date night, find a common hobby with her.)

    I hope this helps.

  • Sheri says:

    Wow I’m not married yet but I do complain about a guy not being romantic sometimes. Being romantic is so overrated. I use to get jealous about the women in the movies. But that is so fake!!!! I bet you were more romantic before the relationship rather than after. It’s typical for guys to be romantic before the relationship to woo the woman. Then once they have her, what’s the point right,? she’s all mine!!! Women want the feeling of emotional connection like it’s when the both of you first met. I guess being romantic is being spontaneous. It’s not the roses and card. that is so boring….If you do the same thing over and over, it gets kinda old. If i were you, write a 2 page love letter on how you feel during the relationship. Tell her how much you love her, tell her all your feelings and thoughts. Tell her where you want to go with her in your lives. Ask her what can you do to make her happy?? Tell her the things you want to do with her, things you want to accomplish. Basically tell her of all your feelings and that you really don’t want to lo0se her. TELL HER THE TRUTH! even about being romantic! On the letter, ask her to reply back in a letter. Women love to communicate all your feelings + theirs.. Slip it in her hand or somewhere she might find. I can tell by your question that the both of you don’t have much communication. Write a love letter. It works for me, it makes life a little interesting. There are no arguments, and you can express alot more. Just try it you’ll see.

  • hopefull says:

    Tell her how much you love her everyday. Call her and text her. Buy her roses with a card.. Write a love letter.. Write her a poem.. Take her out to very romantic places.. Do favors for her.. Ask her how her day was.. Kiss her on the forhead Cuddle with her…hold her..at night.. Tell her how pretty she is and why you love her.. Giver her compliments.. Take her shopping and spoil her.. Buy her candles.. Take walks with her. ..that’s what I would want from my b.f of 4 yrs.

  • tashen'ka says:

    Just be yourself. If she loves you, she’ll love you for who you are, no matter whether you’re romantic or not. You could try to be an actor and act a romantic guy, but that will not be you, and at some point, you’ll get very tired of playing that role.

  • Nikki says:

    You are the one that knows how badly you have behaved and how much you have hurt her and how you have hurt her. Try reversing all the wrongs, talk to her, apologize for all that you have done. Tell her you are willing to go get family counseling, this way a Professional counselor can tell you what to do and she can get her pain and aches out so it doesn’t come back to haunt you. Go on a vacation with her. And most importantly support her and love her. Good luck to both of you. Oh, give yourself a pad on the shoulder for wanting to change.

  • Elle H says:

    Start being more of a listener and you’ll be able to pick up on the signals. Romance isn’t just flowers and candy, it’s helping out with the cleaning, bringing home a special "chic" flick, even something as simple as running her a hot bubble bath. Take time when making love to let her feel good (it really isn’t all about the Mr).
    Simple things like noticing how good she looks in her jeans (and telling her without just rushing to remove them), buying her a sappy Hallmark card once in a while, just asking her to sit on the porch and watch the sunset.
    Lots of ways to show how you feel, and it doesn’t hurt to say it either!

  • First Time Mom says:

    Find out from her what she feels is missing, and what she needs from you. Have a respectful conversation with her. Give her your undivided attention, and talk with her for as long as she needs to. If she gets upset, don’t take it personally. It’s because she is hurting, so try not to get upset back at her. Don’t take personally or get upset with what she might tell you. Just really listen. Try to see where she is coming from. Even if you think she is overreacting or being ridiculous.

    Just be there for her. TELL HER you DON’T want to loose her!!!!! Find out what it is/was that she loves about you, why she fell in love with you. Try to be that for her. When she tells you what she needs, then THAT IS what she needs. Do that for her.

    It goes both ways, but she will come around and meet your needs if you can lift her up by meeting hers. DON’T give up on her!!!! And make sure she knows you won’t.

    Women are notorious for "dropping hints" which are usually not picked up by men. But try to be more sensitive to those signals. If she seems upset, and tells you she’s fine, she’s probably not fine. Inquire about her feelings.

    Anyway, in a nut shell, just find out about her and how she is feeling, and what she needs from you. Take it to heart. Show your concern for her. Try to be what she needs.

    Marriage counseling is always good if you try and things don’t improve.

    I hope that you and your wife can find a balance again.

  • Moonbaby says:

    I read this in a relationship book once, tried it and it brought me and my boyfriend much closer. We were slipping into a rut, and picking on eachother for stupid things. I could see the relationship falling apart. EVERYDAY, we would take 15 minutes, sit facing eachother, hold hands, and look into eachothers eyes. Each had an opportunity to say what was on their mind, calmly, in a loving way. Even if we had nothing to say, just keeping eye contact is meaningfull. Don’t feel silly, after all…. this is your wife, let me know how it goes if you try it…..good luck

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2. Learn to control your emotions.

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