In your book of marriage?

Cheating or Money? Which has a greater ground for divorce.
Someone I know let her husband loss all her saving.. 200,000 on 1 stock. Do you think it’s forgivable?
They just got married in the begining of July, and she wants a divorce.
The reason I’m taking it seriously, it’s because she’s my younger sister, she doesn’t have any support system except for me. She have no friends or other family.

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18 Responses to “In your book of marriage?”

  • snowbirdbabe says:

    There is a real trust issue here. I think that cheating is worse, but, money is the main reason that couples split. If these people really want to save the marriage, they should seek some counselling. If not, they should check into having the marriage annulled. They haven’t been married that long and this may be an option.

    I’m not saying to divorce, or split up, but, all options need to be considered. Unless they can work thru all of their issues, there will always be problems, and, a marriage without trust is just like a day without sunshine.

  • some female says:

    Well, it depends. Did he do this without her knowledge or permission? If so, yep, it’s grounds for divorce because he went behind her back with a lot of money and then lost it all. No spouse has the right to make major financial decisions without the other. In my book, it’s just as bad as cheating because of the break of trust and the lies.

  • BossLady says:

    HE MADE A MISTAKE PEOPLE!

    Yes, that’s a lot of money, but I honestly have to say that is forgivable. What’s unforgivable is that a person lied in front of God and their family in friends and vowed to love them forever, unconditionally, for better or for worst, til death do us part!~That’s unforgivable–so I guess they need a divorce~ she lied on their wedding day, and she loves money more than him!–its too soon to make those kinds of decisions, she’s angry, it will blow over–could that be a possibility? OH’ Yeah–you need to stay out of it!- other people only complicate a situation

  • Geez Louise says:

    How did they lose all her savings on one stock? Don’t sell the stock when it is low….wait and sell when it is up! How would he be able to do this without her permission? If he took her money and did this without her knowledge…unforgiveable in my book. This is a person who is willing to take chances without discussing it with his partner. Cheating and money are both very touchy situations in marriage…it all depends on each individual what are grounds, as we all have different tolerances.

  • madeit says:

    After 26 years of adult life I have noticed that marriges end with a breach of fidelity.

  • Virginia says:

    Wow. I’m sorry for her loss, but she should not let him have control of her money - especially a brand new husband. Yes, it’s forgivable, but he needs to work hard to make it up and pay it back to her.

    Cheating or money - both are betrayal. I think cheating is worse though.

  • frigginhilarious says:

    200,000 dollars? are you kidding, he would be gone as quickly as her money. that’s too much cash to lose just to blow off or "forgive".

  • Mrs.G-unit says:

    It depends on the person and what their marriage means to them. If your marriage is based on fidelilty and infidelity is a deal breaker your going to have a different opinion from someone who is willing to find out why the cheating occured as well making a plan to ensure it never happens again. Now as far as the losing the money in the stock market is concerned. Yes, that is alot of money, and I can definitley understand her frustration, I don’t know if I would end my marriage. I mean after all when your investing your taking a risk. period. Then I don’t think he intentionally tried to invest in a bad investment. I mean if he made 200,000 she wouldn’t leave. I mean you have to be realistic, you can’t have the good without the bad.

  • celticwoman777 says:

    I think cheating is the greater ground for divorce. However, if I were this woman, I’d leave this guy fast. He sounds like a user and a loser. I’d be willing to bet he’ll repeat this behavior again and it will become the pattern of their lives. I don’t usually advocate divorce … but he doesn’t sound very trustworthy. Trust is extremely important for a marriage to be successful. I MIGHT give him only 1 more chance. Otherwise she’s only going to end up losing everything. I pray things go well for her.

  • Joycee says:

    HA! I would keep him if he lost that much money…and make sure he worked 14 hours a day to replace every penny of it, I would sell off all his stuff in a yard sale or ebay and he would be sleeping in the extra room ..once it was repaid..then I would divorce him.

  • YIN&YANGWOLONGQLKM!!! says:

    HIMEI SWEETIE PEA, as a CHINESE WOMAN, how would you sum up a marriage? XIEXIE

    It’s only money, they(your sister & her husband) can work for it. Since they’ve lossed that huge amount of money in one stock. They are smart enough to make it up later.

  • CHUCK S says:

    money

  • jcdunton30 says:

    Without knowing the situation…
    Cheating or money, I guess it all depends on the person. Some people are focused more on finances while others are focused on emotion.
    Everything is forgivable. Everything. If you cant forgive someone, at least accept it. If you cant do either of the two, it will haunt you for the rest of your life.
    Remember, marriage and love are two different things. Love is being able to open yourself up to another person while a marriage is a contract saying that you agree to support this person, emotionally and physically, forever until death.
    Is this person saying that money is more important to her than this other person who has opened themselves up to her?
    The root meaning of the word ‘intimacy’ means a journey into fear. Getting involved in a relationship with anyone is truly a journey into fear. Is she afraid of losing more money or is she afraid of losing her husband? Remember, to love anyone you must first be able to know and love yourself first. What does she want in her life to make her happy? Love or money???

  • Dave B. says:

    If some ass managed to lose 200,000 in 1 stock she needs to get rid of that SOB!!! I know very little about the stock market, but I even know better than that! I am sorry but 200,000!! To take someone’s life saving and act so foolishly and selfishly with it, yeah I would get rid of that person, husband, wife, heck my own mother! He just destroyed her financial safety net. He has greatly damaged the life of the woman he swore he would love and take care of. Well he took care of her all right, he turned her into almost a street person in 1 month. Did he have her permission to do that with her money. Yeah I know they are married but lets face it it was her life savings, not his. This guy is a fool, a crook, or both. Either way I think she should get rid of him. I really can not believe a man would do something that stupid to the woman he "loves". I feel so sorry for her. In my book cheating is grounds for a divorce and if a woman stays with a man that does that them she is a fool. Yet, to take your spouses’ life saving and just destroy her financial security that she has worked for!!! Yes that is ground for divorce to in my book. There is something not right with this guy, she should run. I just wish she could have gotten to see what a dumb@ss he really is before she married him. I would cut my losses and get out. That’s just the way I see it. He really has in a way put her life at risk by taking away the only financial security she had. I am so sorry.

  • brooke Adams says:

    I can only say one thing,first I would make sure he really did lose all the money, and didnt just say he did, I would have the police be looking at him. He has the sound of an asian man I think, I am surprised if he is not

  • black phoenix says:

    well you said she let husband put all her money into one stock, well he took a gamble on the otherside what if he would have won big on the stocks and receive millions would she want a divorce i think not,i myself would never put all my money into one stock but if they took that route there are always pros and cons to each gamble , so i say no.

  • Smartassawhip says:

    Please see my answer in your other question, "My sister wants a divorce". As far as grounds for divorce, it depends on the state you live in as far as what the legal grounds for divorce are. The state of Minnesota, where I live, is a "no fault divorce" state. The only grounds needed to get divorced are, "irreconcilable differences.

  • sAm cbt says:

    Lost money can be replaced - loss of trust is very hard to replace. So, cheating is much worse, if the C/couple is truly in love.

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