How do you fall in love with your husband- again?
It is not that I want to leave him. But he’s hurt me – a lot. He’s also lied about so many little pointless things that I’ve lost trust. He is not a man of his word so it’s hard to find little reasons to gain back trust. I say I love him when he says it to me, but I don’t say it first usually.
He needs to learn to stop lying. He needs to find ways to gain my trust back. Four years of lying and doing horrible things really hurt. I can forgive him all I want, but he doesn’t understand that it doesn’t take pain away or put trust back.
I don’t know how to love him anymore. How do you fall in love again?
What would you tell him if you could?
He IS seeing someone, for about 2 months now. Although I don’t think he’s talking about the right things – he thinks he’s perfect it seems and that I am the problem.
I’m 20 he is 22.
Actually what’s funny is he only does things alone but in the same room as me. He doesn’t involve me with anything. He hardly talks to me, I understand some because he’s not a talkative guy – but he says nothing. He will not read with me, will not do anything unless it’s watch TV or play a video game with me. Which doesn’t make me feel better, I just feel like his brother or roommate.
Exactly what I told you/everyone (above) is what I’ve nicely said to him. He actually yelled at me for it. He thinks I’m holding a grudge and it’s all my fault. I’ve never hurt him, lied to him, never cheated on him or did anything wrong. Most I’ve ever done was call him a jerk or other small name because he name calls me ALL the time.
We have a 1 yr old btw. I’m the only one who takes care of her, even when I want a break, he doesn’t do anything to help me. I love our daughter but I need time to myself and it’s his child TOO.
At this point I don’t know what would put even a fraction of trust back. He’s done a lot wrong, I don’t want to list the horrible things. But he treats me wrong – that’s the point of this. He wants to work things out but doesn’t do anything.
My dad abandoned me and my husband’s new catchphrase is "I’m not your dad" because he thinks I’m mad at him because of him. Which IS wrong, I’m mad my husband spend the first year together, behind my back, trying to get someone else back. I’m pissed about other things he’s done, all the lying/cheating, him being stupid… I’m hurt about that. He knows this, and thinks I have a grudge. I don’t and even if I did, I am allowed to have lost love and trust in him from the things he’s done.
NO HE IS SEEING A DOCTOR that’s what I mean not another ‘person’
Well if anyone is willing to help 1-on-1 my yahoo IM is cizinsmistress
we have a little girl together. He doesn’t help me with her – ever. I’m the only one to take care of her. Even when I’m unwell. I never get a break. As much as I love her – it is his child TOO.
Okay — we’ve seen the movies. Didn’t change a thing.
If anyone wants to help 1-on-1 my yahoo IM is cizinsmistress
Filed under: How To Save A Marriage
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