hi

i was married 7 years to a man who was very moody and hard to deal with.

when it came to sex, we didnt do it or he would make me feel silly for asking. it kinda made me feel like i was being desperate!! i just wanted to be loved. it made me afraid to approach him and the pain of being rejected cut me like a knife. i will never forget that awful feeling.

before i met him, i was confident with myself. now i am not.

i had to leave my ex as it was making me become ill and i was always crying.

now i live with my new man and he is great.

we have a good sex life and he is a lovely person.

but last night, i flipped out because he said he just wanted to sleep as he was so sleepy from work (he works a 15 hour day- 5am to 7pm)

immediatley old pain came flooding back and i pushed him away from me. he was abit suprised, and i had to go out of the room for 10 minutes to figure out why i had flipped. its because i remembered that awful horrible pain that i used to experience.

i immediatley thought ‘he doesnt want me’

i apologised and he gave me a cuddle and said it was ok.

i mentioned why it had made me flip and he was ok with that.

but i need to let go of my past and be free and be my old self again.

i feel so afraid to come on to my boyfriend incase he says no. and then i also feel stupid for not being able to be feisty and sexy and take control. i am consumed with all these intense feelings.

how do i become more free sexually?

how do i learn that it is ok to be sexually confident?

how do i let go of the bad memories of my ex husband?

why does he still haunt me?

i have to sort this out so i can enjoy my life!

can you help?

louise xx

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