Is this something positive for a husband to say to his wife?

One day I was telling my husband that I needed him to take more time out with me to help me practice for my driver’s license. Well, he just up and told me that I need to talk to the man that pissed in my momma’s *****. My husband I have been married for seven years now. We have three kids together. We both are 30 years old. I don’t have my driver’s license, and I really want to get it. My mom died when I was 7 years old. She has been dead for 23 years as of now.. Should I leave him for saying something like this to me? This is not the first time that he has said anything bad about my mom to me. One time, he got so mad at me and he told me to die like my momma. My momma died by getting hit by a car. I think someone murdered her. There was never closure to her death. Why does my husband treat me this way? I love him and I take good care of our kids when he is always gone. I have no job, and no money… I have left him about three times since we was married, mostly for Domestic Violence situations. I have taken him back later down the line, believing that he has changed and that he really loves me and the kids.. I hated to see the kids without a father in their lives. But right now, I am hurting.. I want out of this marriage.. But, I have no help. I can’t work because of a Herniated Disc in my back.. I am waitiing on the results of my SSI appeal. I don’t know what decision will be made.. I have no money, no car, no driver’s license.. I don’t even have any money in the bank nor on me.. I am scared… I love him, but right at this time that is not even enough tp save this marriage. I have been unahppy with him for a while now,. I have even told him so, but still he stays with me.. He wants to work out whatever with me.. But, I don’t know if I can put up with his ways anymore..

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13 Responses to “Is this something positive for a husband to say to his wife?”

  • Me 2009 says:

    he sounds evil. do you have any family that could help you?

  • ♥Bella♥ says:

    He does not sound like a nice man, you deserve better.

  • Black Mamba says:

    What a cu*t sucking d*ck!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    Oh my gosh I’m sorry about my language but this man does not deserve you. Nor does he love you. Does he have a problem with drugs and alcohol? Because if he doesn’t, he is a loser and I would take my children and run because no child deserves to see their mother treated like that and no woman deserves that kind of FOUL treatment.

  • Majiencospy says:

    You will be stuck in this rut forever. And ever. And ever. And ever.

    Well with that attitude anyway, how many excuses have you made now not to leave him? No job, no money – one question.

    Why dont you do a course in your spare time? Then get a job after you leave him? You’ve put up a huge barrier beforehand of ‘no this, no that’ you have mentally convinced yourself that your not capable of achieving things solely by yourself.

    Just get over it and/or Leave him. But dont give us excuses for not leaving him.

  • bAbYmAmA* says:

    Here’s the thing…none of us can tell you something magical that can make you just up and leave your husband for good. That is something YOU have to do on your own.

    First, you need to get your life in order. Get a job, get your license, do what you have to do for yourself and for your children. In the meantime, put up with his s h i t. Be as nice as you can possibly be, because this way, when you bottle your anger, you’ll have a more explosive result. It’ll make it easier for you to leave.

    Hope this helps. Keep positive!

  • sonni c says:

    He’s taking advantage of the fact that you have health concerns and are in a bind. Abusers love this kind of situation so they can act out to their evil hearts content. If there’s a place to go go there leave and don’t look back unless he’s willing to go to counseling and change.

    This is not a good environment for you or the kids so don’t stay because of the kids this is not doing them any favors. You don’t need him, focus on how to have a better life one that doesn’t include all this drama.

    If he won’t go to counseling then go for yourself for support and guidance.

  • Skylight says:

    Divorce the bastard

  • Cristina says:

    You are right, you are surely right, if you want to leave him. He is taking advantage of your unstable economical situation. He gets power from your weakness. He is brutal.
    Talk to a lawyer, or go and denounce him to police, better the lawyer. Do so that he goes far away from you and your children. Please, do it for yourself, you are still young!

  • starkreed says:

    One step at a time..one day at a time…try not to look at the whole problem..break it down into workable parts.. so..the first thing you need is help with your back..find help..there is help for that:Herniated Disc in my back.*..They have treatments that can heal that..look ask google ect..next thing..find work if you can online work ect..then go to a area church and ask them for help with driving a car they will help. or learn a new skill..look around for help..look for help with non-profits in your area..that help women with un-healthy..marriages.. ask for help..your husband is not well..(Seek help for him to..there is hope..always hope but you must open yourself up to it..do you pray..if it is yes..try it..pray anyway you like..just belive that when you do pray..they Will be answered ..Only you can pray for yourself..we don’t know all the things that are wrong..i will promise you..if you ask for help..it will come..ask for help from angels..they say all people have them..in your room by your self…ask your angel for help..first ask your angel name..and what ever name you here in your head..thats the angels name..be quiet in your mind and ask your angel for help..and listen for a soft answer in your thoughts.. Ask Ask Ask..!!

  • mariapavletic says:

    Leave an abusive relationship is a powerful choice. I know it is not easy, but if I could leave, so you can. You need two things, one is handle out an abusive domestic partner.Here’s some tips:
    -Tell him "Do not talk to me like that. I don’t like it" every time, EVERY TIME he was disrespectful to you. After that, walk away, do not talk to him again until he talks to you with the respect you deserve. A great book to learn how to handle out the situation is called Talking Power in an Abusive Relationship by Agata Campos. Easy to follow steps, it help me to figure out an abusive relationship, divorce included.
    In regarding to develop an economic self-sufficiency:
    -Still working in your SS issue.
    -Write a list of works you can do regardless of your background: cleaning services as a self-employed, care giver, selling stuff on amazon or ebay, working at home or for a company.
    -Study:come back college, applied for financial aid
    Keep in mint once you can save money to rent an apartment, you can move out, applied for food stamps, and child support.

    Make a plan, step by step, learn to set up boundaries, educate your partner, you deserve respect like him, and look for ways to develop your own economy.
    If I could, you can!

  • Sandy Ego says:

    Obviously, this situation is not healthy, and you already know it. He hasn’t changed, and he probably won’t. You’re stuck with what you chose, hun.

  • Powder_Puff_Chick says:

    To put it bluntly….

    LEAVE HIM!!!

    This man sounds like dirt and he trweats you like dirt. The things he say ‘go die like your mom’ That’s appauling. Babe, you deserve better, by a mile.

  • Mary A says:

    Love has to be a two way street. It sounds like you love your husband but he does not love you. He is abusive, physically and verbally. He can’t love you because he doesn’t even know how to love him self. I know it is hard to look into an unknown future and wonder how in the world you can make it with out his money. However, sometimes enough is enough. If you think you can stick it out until your SSI comes through, then stick it out. But as soon as your back pay comes in LEAVE HIM and don’t look back. Don’t tell him you are leaving, don’t threaten him that you are leaving. Just up and leave. He can figure it out when he comes home and you are gone. Try to find a friend or another family member to teach you how to drive and don’t even bother telling him you are learning. He doesn’t care any way. It sounds as though he doesn’t want you to get your license so you have to depend on him. If you have any thought of this marrage getting any better just think of it this way "Take spoiled milk and throw it away, wait thirty years and drag it back out of the trash – it’s still spoiled and no good for nothing"

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