Tell me, is this psycho or smart?
My bf and I have been together over 4 years now, we have discuss marriage often, and agree we will definitley get married. We have ring shopped, and picked out the rings, he just has to save a little longer and buy it. We talked about the who, what, when, where, and how much about our wedding. It’s dead set we’re getting married, we just haven’t actually decided when, but probably in 2 more years (a yr after I finish college). The thing is, is that we are not "officially" engaged yet, but I found the perfect wedding dress and it’s at an amazing price! (0)!!! I wasn’t even seriously looking, and there is was sitting on the rack all perfect screaming out BUY ME!!! It’s exactly what I want. So, do I buy it? Will it be a psycho move to plan and buy for a wedding and he hasn’t even asked yet? And my big question, should I tell him or just store it and surprise him with it later? (he’s be thrilled to save $ from the budget, and learn how much I saved). What should I do?
I’m going to marry him, we’re going to be together for the rest of our lives, so I think I can handle the next 2 years….
Our wedding will be on the beach, and I have always and will always want that. I hate churches (not to offend anyone, I just really hate going, and I’m not religious in the least) and I’m not paying a ton of money for a huge wedding. The beach wedding is us all the way, and we wouldn’t have it any other way.
The dress is a style that I don’t think will ever go out of style, it’s pretty classic. Even if it does, I love it. My taste in clothes has never really changed, I’ve always had a classic flair, especially when I get dressed up. I’m not trendy at all! I KNOW I’ll still love this dress.
I’ve been the same size and shape since I was a teenager, and I’m in my 30’s now. My mother is the same size and shape she had when she was a teenager, and she’s had 4 kids and is 50. So, that isn’t a problem. I’m happy with my size and shape. I’m sure it won’t change.
And it’s only 0! That doesn’t put a dent in my savings account now, and it certainly won’t matter in 2 years, so it doesn’t matter to me if I do happen to change my mind….I’m worried if I pass it up, I’ll regret it big time. I’m very very picky when it comes to clothes, so to find something so perfect and at such a great price confuses me! I don’t know if it’s crossing the line, or if I should just get it.
Being together in 2 years, changing my mind about the dress, it being in style in 2 years, and being the same size are non-issues…
Not wanting to let the dress get away, and not making him feel pressured is… How can I have both?
And it’s only 0! That doesn’t put a dent in my savings account now, and it certainly won’t matter in 2 years, so it doesn’t matter to me if I do happen to change my mind….I’m worried if I pass it up, I’ll regret it big time. I’m very very picky when it comes to clothes, so to find something so perfect and at such a great price confuses me! I don’t know if it’s crossing the line, or if I should just get it.
Being together in 2 years, changing my mind about the dress, it being in style in 2 years, and being the same size are non-issues…
Not wanting to let the dress get away, and not making him feel pressured is… How can I have both?
alright Just Deal, do you feel better about yourself now? Keep the insults to yourself, and don’t act like you know my man! You have no idea what he would say or think, so maybe YOU need to pull your head out of the clouds. If your gonna have attitude, don’t bother answering any of my questions. I don’t need to hear the opinion of an ignorant bi(ch anyway.
I wish I could rate some of you guys, I’ve gotten some really great answers, and some real $hitty answers.
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Tagged with: beach wedding • bf • budget • churches • clothes • flair • marriage • money • psycho • quot • rest of our lives • shape • Smart • teenager • wedding dress
Filed under: How To Save A Marriage
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Ok, slow down! Have you even tried it on yet? If you haven’t, do that first before worrying about it! If it fits nice, then you can worry! Are you tight with his mother? Do they know and agree to you guys getting married? If so, ask her what she your fiance’s reaction would be! Go from there…
I think your completely nuts! He won’t be "thrilled" he’ll think your looney tunes! Get your head out of the clouds!
Go ahead and buy it ifs its such a good deal. you dont have to tell him, but if you do tell him you plan on getting married eventually, atleast you have one thing out of the way lol
Buy it if you really want it, but in 2 years your taste may have gone through a drastic change, and your body may change as well. What I wanted 2 years ago is definitely not what I want now. However, if your heart is set on it, then buy it. Don’t tell your boyfriend that you bought it, then store it away until that day. Good luck.
If it’s two years away it’s a risk, you may not be the same size, you may not be getting married, and you may change your mind about the wedding plans. Buy the dress if you want but don’t spend too much on it, may be wasted money.
don’t buy it tell him about it and let him know how much dresses cost and ask him if he thinks it’s a good idea if you too are as open as you say then there would be no harm done.
Well it is kind of creepy to buy a dress before you are engaged. But if you do, keep it a secret!
I worked with a girl who had her wedding dress before her and her boyfriend were engaged. He ended up leaving her, and there sat her dress!
Heck, for 120 bucks, just buy it and store it away (I wouldn’t tell him about it). Even if something were to happen (not saying that it will, but you never know), you wouldn’t be out much money.
If you want the dress, buy it. But if it’s going to be a few years down the line to get married, then remember that dress styles change and you may find one you like more later.
I would be careful about telling him you bought the dress. He may see it as you are "rushing him to the altar" and may take it the wrong way.
If you want to buy it go for it. Although you never know if you might find an even better dress within the next 2 years… If you don’t buy it you might look back and wish you had… but if you find something you like better you won’t be out a fortune because that is a pretty good deal.
Talk about putting the cart before the horse! Don’t buy a wedding dress before you’re engaged. First of all, your tastes will probably change before you get married. Second, if you tell your bf you might freak him out. Focus your energy on getting that ring – then the rest will fall into place. Good luck!
Heck buy it… if you don’t use it as a wedding gown you can turn it into a halloween outfit. Too good of a deal and if it is screaming your name… buy it and store it. Slip a hint you found a nice white dress that could either be a weddding dress or halloween outfit some day to your man and see how he reacts. Best wishes, but don’t fully count your chickens until they hatch, have a back up plan!
Buy the dress. It sounds like you will beat yourself up later if you don’t. And the upside is if your style changes and you decide later that you want something different, you’re only down $120, and not even that if you manage to turn the dress around and sell it on craigslist or ebay.
As for telling your boyfriend, I would advise against it. I know that you’re only buying it because you love it and don’t want to let the opportunity pass you by, but more likely than not, he may feel as though you are pressuring him and trying to hint that you want to get married sooner than you two had planned.
Congrats on finding the dress, btw. I just bought mine last week and just like with finding the perfect man, when you know, YOU KNOW.
I know it’s a great deal, but it’s always best to wait until you have booked a location. It might look perfect now, but when you officially start planning, you might decide to have a completely different type of wedding and that perfect dress is no longer perfect. So, if you don’t mind potentially wasting $120, go for it.
I don’t think your nutz for beingexcited about the wedding, since the two of you have picked outrings….but he hasn’t proposed yet, has he? Who knowss what will happen from now to two years from now? Also, on another note, that dress may not even be in style or part of your taste, or even your size in 2 years. You are still in school people change their minds about styles all the time. I am sure you will come accross another dress down the line, probably even better.
Talk with your boyfriend about it. Tell him the situation ("I know our wedding is a long way off, but I found the dress I want to marry you in for a great deal. What do you think?).
Then, if you and your boyfriend decide it is a smart thing to do, go for it.
There is always the chance that he freaks out and thinks its psycho. But you’ll never know unless you talk about it.
Also consider whether the dress will still be what you want to wear in 2-years. Styles change, your size may change, your taste may change. Then, what you thought was a great deal is just a waste of $120.
Good luck!
go for it. It cant hurt any one tell him to he will be happy that it cost only 120.00 that is a good deal but the only thing is will you still love it in two years i am sure you will. Good Luck
You don’t even know that in two years you’ll be the same size! I wouldn’t buy it, you’ll always find good prices on dresses. That was the cheapest part of my wedding! Mine was only $89.00 and its beautiful! If you buy it you might freak him out or if you have a good relationship maybe you should try and tell him casually like, "Today when I was shopping I found the most beautiful dress and it was only $120.00 and see where it goes from there.
i think its wise! buy the dress..i looked everyones answers and the ones that say your taste or size will change, yes that is a possibility, so if that happens then sell the dress for more than what you bought it for on ebay or something:) you cant lose with this
good luck with everything 
You have two options:
1 – Tell him about the dress and ask him if he would mind if you buy it.
2 – Buy it and don’t tell him til’ after he pops the question.
I’d go with #1. My now-fiance & I were talking about getting engaged, he had already decided what colors he wanted for the wedding, we were looking at rings and had even discussed the date we would get married and I walked into a craft store and found invites that were 1/2 price and I just loved how pretty but simple they were.
I grabbed my cellphone, told him "I swear I didn’t plan this" and told him about the deal. His answer was "if you like them get ‘em – if I hate them or anything changes you can sell ‘em on eBay". I showed them to him and he loved ‘em and we saved more than we could have hoped.
The other cool thing is that they don’t make that style anymore so it was a good deal.
go ahead and buy it… $120 is a drop in the bucket. It really won’t hurt your budget. If you decide it’s not the dress for you in two years (gain or loss of weight?) you can easily sell it.
Buy it. If you change plans or your mind, you can sell it on ebay or even donate it to a charity. At that price, it wouldn’t be a huge sacrifice. I’d buy it, but not discuss it with him at present.
Buy it!
Ok before you buy it though….
Are you the same weight you have been for years? Do you plan on loosing weight before the wedding. If you loose or gain a little it will be fine you can get it altered… two years is a long time if you are someone who has had any weight issues. If not then you should go ahead and get it. It is not that big of a deal.
Go for it!!! Even if it doesn’t work out for some reason and you decide to get a different dress, it was only $120 so no big deal. On the other hand, if you still love it in 2 years, you got a total bargain!
My fiance and I knew we were going to get married long before we were actually engaged, so I started picking up things and buying decor for my wedding the whole year prior. We were engaged in April and are getting married in October, and let me say it has saved tons of money since I’m not doing it all at the same time…less stress as well!
As far as your wedding gown goes, I’m not sure I would advise you to get it now if you know you’ll be waiting another 2 years. Styles and tastes can change, as well as weight and preference…you may end up not wanting to be married on the beach in a couple of years, so just take all of that into consideration.
However with me, I have always had the same taste and never swayed from it……what I wanted 2 years ago I’m still doing now, so it’s really just a matter of determining the outcome and how set on this dress you are! Best wishes!! And congrats!
I know it sounds like a deal you can’t pass up, but here’s the deal:
1- you don’t want to curse yourself by buying a dress before you’ve been proposed to. ANYTHING could happen between now and then. Your wedding may be 2 years away!
2- You might find a WAY more perfect dress later. If you buy one now, you’ll feel stuck to this dress and not have the freedom to look or buy a (possibly) better dress later.
3- You can always take a picture of a dress to a REALLY GREAT seamstress and have the dress made later if you can’t find it any more… OR if your dress is by a popular, mass-producing designer, you should be able to find it later.
Besides, maybe you can give the money you would spend on the dress to him to help him get your ring! Ok, maybe not, but don’t drive yourself crazy over a dress before you explore your options.
If it’s $120… it’s a pretty good deal though… maybe you should get it… if you don’t use THAT dress, you can always make money on it later. But make sure the dress dosn’t age or turn yellow while you store it away for 2 years.
Good luck!
I don’t know, maybe I’m just superstitious, but I wouldn’t want to buy the dress before being asked. I wouldn’t want to jynx anything. You know, like when people are expecting a baby, they usually don’t do the nursery until the end. Similarly, I’d rather start putting money aside now and save up for a dress to buy later. Besides, what if by the time you get married, you find another dream dress that you like better. Plus, white dresses have a tendency to get yellow…so you’d probably still have to pay some money to preserve it. I dunno, but then again, if you REALLY do love it…then get it. However, don’t just get it because you like it and the price is great. Get it only because you LOVE it. Ask youself this question…if the dress was $600, would you still want to get it now. If the answer is yes, then ok, get it. But, if the answer is no, then this isn’t really your dream dress and u’re just getting too caught up over the bargain price. Good luck!
Have you talked to your boyfriend about it yet? If you two have decided you’re getting married, shopped for rings, and discussed details of the wedding, I don’t see why you shouldn’t discuss this with him as well. If he thinks it’s a good idea (especially considering the price), then go ahead.
Like some of the others have said, 2 years is a long time, and it may no longer be "exactly what you want" when the wedding is closer. However, if it’s only $120, it wouldn’t be that big of a deal to sell it and buy a different dress.
Just one more thing to consider……if you guys aren’t engaged yet, and you just happened to find this dress, I’m guessing you haven’t spent alot of time trying on different styles (or at least I hope you haven’t). I would be cautious of buying the first dress you like, because you never know how other styles may look on you until you try them on. Just something to think about!